纸— Part 1 评分报告

建议: 답변 구조가 명확하지 않고 반복과 불필요한 말(umm, like, struggling)이 많습니다. 주제 문장을 명확히 하고 1~2개의 구체적인 이유나 예시를 연결어(For example, because 등)로 이어 표현하세요. 문법적으로는 시제와 동사 형태(예: "have never made" 대신 간결한 설명 유지, "I need to learn" 등)를 고쳐 자연스럽게 말하도록 연습하세요.

示例: No, I have never made paper crafts, but I would like to try. For example, I enjoy creative activities, so I would like to learn origami or paper cutting to make simple decorations.

建议: 내용 전달이 불명확하고 단어 선택이 부적절합니다("harmful", "trip" 등). 짧고 직접적으로 답하고, 이유와 빈도(when/how often) 같은 구체적 정보로 뒷받침하세요. 불필요한 채워말(umm, I I)도 줄이세요.

示例: I rarely write physical letters nowadays. I only write them on special occasions, for example when I want to express sincere feelings that are difficult to say by message.

建议: 의견은 표현했으나 문장이 길고 혼란스럽습니다. 한두 문장으로 이유를 명확히 하고 연결어(However, Because 등)를 사용하세요. 복수·단수와 시제, 관사 사용에 유의하고 불필요한 반복을 제거하세요.

示例: I don't think many people keep handwritten letters today because messaging apps and social media are more convenient. However, some people still keep letters for sentimental reasons.

建议: 전달하려는 내용은 괜찮지만 문법과 어휘 선택에 오류가 있습니다("poem" 오용, "rotate" 부적절). 간결한 주제문과 이유(예: for study, for reminders)를 연결어로 덧붙이면 좋습니다.

示例: As a student, I usually carry paper and pens when I go out for study. But if I don't need them, I rely on my mobile phone for notes because it's more convenient.

建议: 좋은 내용(감정 표현을 위해 그림을 그렸다는 점)이 있으나 문장구조와 시제가 섞여 흐릿합니다. 과거 습관은 과거 시제로 간결히 말하고, 현재와의 비교는 연결어(Now, Nowadays)로 분리해 표현하세요.

示例: As a child, I loved drawing on paper because it helped me express my feelings. Nowadays, I mostly use paper for writing notes or letters instead.

× No, I have never made a craft with a paper before, but if I have a chance, I do want to do it.

✓ No, I have never made a craft with paper before, but if I have the chance, I would like to try it.

Original contains article error ('a paper' should be 'paper') and awkward modal tense. Use 'paper' without 'a' for uncountable material and 'if I have the chance' or 'if I had the chance' with 'would like to' for polite desire. Suggestion: use 'paper' as uncountable and 'would like to try' for willingness.

× Actually, I'm not really good at doing something else with my hand, but umm, I need to like, umm, struggling, uh, I need to struggling how to do it and then I have to work a better to do it.

✓ Actually, I'm not very good at doing things with my hands, and I have to practice to learn how to do it and improve.

Several issues: plural and noun form ('something else' -> 'things'), plural of 'hand' -> 'hands', incorrect verb forms 'need to struggling' should be 'need to practice' or 'am struggling to learn'. Also 'work a better' is incorrect; use 'improve' or 'practice more'. Suggestion: use correct verb patterns (need to + base verb) and plural nouns when appropriate.

× I I still write the physical letters when I feel like little bit like harmful or something else like that.

✓ I still write physical letters when I feel a little sentimental or when it feels more personal.

Awkward and incorrect word choice: 'like harmful' is wrong; likely meant 'sentimental' or 'nostalgic'. 'the physical letters' -> 'physical letters' (no article) and 'I I' is duplication. Suggestion: choose appropriate adjectives and remove repeated words.

× Umm but honestly in usual I didn't write it, but that's trip a little.

✓ But honestly, I don't usually write them; that's a bit rare for me.

Tense mismatch: 'in usual I didn't write it' should be 'I don't usually write them' (present habit). 'that's trip a little' is unclear; likely 'that's a bit rare'. Suggestion: use 'usually' with present simple for habits and plural pronoun 'them' for letters.

× Honestly speaking, I don't think so that the people still write the Handico handwriting letters today's it because as the online and then Internet platform has been like grown, a lot of people use some kind of like Internet messages or something else like Instagram or Kakaoto such like that platform so that we we doesn't have a chance to use the handwriting.

✓ Honestly, I don't think people still write handwritten letters today because online platforms have grown, and many people use internet messages or apps like Instagram or KakaoTalk, so we don't have many chances to use handwriting.

Many pronoun and article errors: 'the people' -> 'people', 'Handico handwriting letters today's it' should be 'handwritten letters today'. Verb agreement 'we we doesn't' -> 'we don't'. 'Internet platform has been like grown' -> 'online platforms have grown'. Suggestion: simplify sentence, use correct plural/singular forms and subject-verb agreement.

× As I am student I usually carry paper and pens when I go out, but if I don't need it to study I usually don't because I do have a poem and a mobile phone that I can rotate it or something else.

✓ As a student, I usually carry paper and pens when I go out, but if I don't need them to study I usually don't because I have a laptop and a mobile phone that I can use.

Article missing: 'As I am student' should be 'As a student'. Pronoun/number: 'it' should refer to plural 'them' (paper and pens). 'poem' likely incorrect word; probably 'laptop' or 'notebook'. 'rotate it' wrong verb; use 'use'. Suggestion: include correct articles and match pronouns to plural nouns.

× It is super comfortable for us. Yep, I usually use phones.

✓ It's very convenient, so I usually use my phone.

Use of 'super comfortable for us' is awkward; 'convenient' fits better. 'phones' -> 'phone' (singular when referring to own device) and include possessive 'my'. Suggestion: use natural collocations like 'convenient' and match number/possessive.

× As a child I usually love to drawing because it by the drawing I can show and then I can explain my feeling and then how do I feel even if I didn't know the world was something else.

✓ As a child I loved drawing because through drawing I could show and explain my feelings and how I felt even if I didn't understand the world.

Verb tense and preposition errors: 'love to drawing' -> 'loved drawing' or 'loved to draw'. 'by the drawing' -> 'through drawing'. 'my feeling' -> 'my feelings'. 'how do I feel' -> 'how I felt'. Suggestion: use past tense for childhood habits and correct prepositions.

× But from now on I use the paper for like writing some kind of like words and the letters such like this.

✓ But now I use paper for writing words and letters like this.

'From now on' is okay but awkward; 'now' is simpler. Remove filler 'like' repeated. Use 'paper' without article and simplify phrase. Suggestion: avoid unnecessary fillers and use concise phrasing.