公园— Part 1 评分报告

建议: Be clear and use correct vocabulary and grammar. Start with a direct topic sentence and add one or two specific supporting details using linking words. For example, correct the tense and avoid unclear words like “shelled.”

示例: Yes, I liked going to parks when I was a child. For example, I often went with my family on weekends to play on the swings and have picnics, which made those days very enjoyable.

建议: Give a complete sentence and explain why briefly. Use linking words (however, because, although) and be specific about how often or why you go or don’t go.

示例: Not really, although I visit parks occasionally. I usually go once a month to exercise or relax because I’m busy during the week.

建议: Answer directly and coherently. Avoid confusing or irrelevant statements. Use a topic sentence then give a specific reason with linking words (because, so, therefore).

示例: Yes, I would like to see more parks in my city because they provide green space and improve air quality, so residents can exercise and relax more easily.

建议: Be specific about the kind of park and structure your answer: topic sentence + supporting detail(s). Use correct words (e.g., ‘park’ not ‘parkour’) and link ideas with words like ‘because’ or ‘so’.

示例: In the future I would like to visit a quiet, leafy park that is calm and relaxing because walking there would help me de-stress and make me feel happier.

× Yeah, I used to go to the park when I was shelled.

✓ Yeah, I used to go to the park when I was a child.

The student used the non-word 'shelled' which creates a sentence structure error and makes the meaning unclear. Replace it with the correct noun 'a child' to match the intended meaning and the past habitual 'used to'. Ensure vocabulary fits context to avoid broken sentence structure.

× Not really, but sometime.

✓ Not really, but sometimes.

The student wrote 'sometime' (an adverb meaning 'at some unspecified time') instead of 'sometimes' (an adverb of frequency). This is a word choice error affecting meaning. Use 'sometimes' to indicate occasional occurrence. Also complete the clause if desired (e.g., 'Not really, but sometimes I do').

× That would be a good idea if I see a lot, but in my city there's a lot of wealth.

✓ That would be a good idea if I saw more, but in my city there is a lot of wealth.

The conditional is mixed incorrectly: 'That would be' requires a past-tense/ subjunctive clause ('if I saw') rather than present 'see'. This is a tense/verb form error (present participle/past confusion). Also 'see a lot' is vague; 'saw more' or 'there were more parks' is clearer. Maintain consistent conditional structure: 'would' + past subjunctive after 'if'.

× A parkour, calm and relaxing and give me the feeling of the relax and make me happy.

✓ A park that is calm and relaxing and gives me a feeling of relaxation and makes me happy.

Multiple issues: 'parkour' is the wrong word (parkour is a sport), missing relative pronoun and incorrect verb forms 'give' and 'make' which should agree with singular 'park' ('gives', 'makes'). 'The relax' is incorrect; use the noun 'relaxation'. This is primarily sentence structure and subject-verb agreement: include a relative clause 'that is', use correct noun forms, and ensure verbs agree with the singular subject.