公园— Part 1 评分报告

建议: Cải thiện: Tránh tiếng ngập ngừng và lỗi ngữ pháp nhỏ. Cụ thể, dùng thì quá khứ cho hành động trong quá khứ (I liked), rút gọn từ thừa và thêm chi tiết cụ thể. Ví dụ: giới thiệu chủ đề, nêu lý do, đưa ví dụ ngắn. Luyện phát âm từ nối và loại bỏ "uh" để tự nhiên hơn.

示例: Yes, I liked going to parks as a child. I often visited parks with my parents because many parks in Vietnam have exercise equipment and colourful playgrounds. For example, we used to play on swings and ride small bicycles every weekend, which made those visits very memorable.

建议: Cải thiện: Sửa lỗi từ vựng và cấu trúc (không phải "going to bed" hay "this play"). Dùng câu ngắn gọn, đúng ngữ pháp và thêm liên từ cho mạch lạc. Nêu rõ cảm giác và hoạt động bạn làm ở công viên. Tránh lặp từ và hoàn thiện ý bị bỏ dở.

示例: Yes, I still enjoy going to parks because they give me a real sense of freedom and relaxation. For instance, I like walking along tree-lined paths and sitting on a bench to read, which helps me unwind after a busy day.

建议: Cải thiện: Tránh ngập ngừng và nói rõ lý do một cách mạch lạc. Sửa ngữ pháp câu điều kiện và dùng từ phù hợp (appear → were built/added; get closer to the next → visit them). Thêm ví dụ về lợi ích cụ thể và ảnh hưởng đến cộng đồng.

示例: Yes, I would. If more parks were built in my city, people could visit them more often, which would encourage exercise and outdoor activities. For example, local residents might use parks for morning jogging or group tai chi, improving public health.

建议: Cải thiện: Hoàn thành ý và sửa ngữ pháp (it talks, I became, get closer to nature). Tránh nói lặp "you know" quá nhiều. Thêm chi tiết cụ thể tên công viên hoặc hoạt động bạn muốn làm và lý do khiến bạn hứng thú.

示例: Yes, I would love to visit a national park in the United States. I saw videos of Yellowstone and became fascinated by its landscapes; I would like to hike, see geysers, and observe wildlife to feel closer to nature.

× As a child, I'd really like to go to the park with my parents because, uh, in Vietnam there are lots of exercise facilities for people to do and also some playground for children to play.

✓ As a child, I really liked going to the park with my parents because in Vietnam there were lots of exercise facilities for people to use and also some playgrounds for children to play in.

'I'd really like to go' is present conditional/contrasting with past; use past 'I really liked' to match 'As a child'. 'There are' should be past 'there were'. 'Facilities for people to do' is incorrect: use 'facilities for people to use'. 'Some playground' should be plural 'some playgrounds' and we need the preposition 'play in'. Suggestion: match tense, use correct verb + preposition collocations, and pluralize countable nouns when needed.

× Absolutely yes, I still like going to bed now 'cause this play give me a sense of freedom and relaxations.

✓ Absolutely yes, I still like going to parks now because this place gives me a sense of freedom and relaxation.

'going to bed' is wrong contextually; use 'going to parks'. 'this play' is a wrong word choice; use 'this place'. 'give' must be third person singular 'gives'. 'relaxations' is usually uncountable 'relaxation'. Suggestion: choose correct nouns, ensure subject-verb agreement, and use uncountable nouns appropriately.

× On top of that I also feel relaxed because there is real space for me to to get closer to the environment avoid from the.

✓ On top of that I also feel relaxed because there is real space for me to get closer to the environment and get away from the city.

'to to' is a typo; remove duplication. 'get closer to the environment avoid from the.' is ungrammatical: use 'get closer to the environment' and express leaving urban area as 'get away from the city'. Suggestion: avoid duplicated words, use proper conjunctions and complete prepositional phrases.

× Uh, if the parks, uh, appear more in my cities, meanwhile, I can get closer to the next more often and moreover, this can burst, uh, so some residents to exercise more like doing some exercise facilities or go for work.

✓ If more parks appeared in my city, I could get to them more often, and this could encourage some residents to exercise more by using the facilities or to go for walks.

'appear more in my cities' is awkward; use 'appeared in my city'. 'meanwhile' and 'moreover' are misused. 'get closer to the next' is unclear; use 'get to them'. 'this can burst, uh, so some residents to exercise' is incorrect; use 'this could encourage some residents to exercise'. 'doing some exercise facilities' is wrong; use 'using the facilities'. 'go for work' likely 'go for walks'. Suggestion: simplify structure, choose correct verbs for encouragement, and use correct prepositions and collocations.

× You know, when I came across the videos on Tiktok, it talk about the National Park in United States of America.

✓ You know, when I came across videos on TikTok, they talked about a national park in the United States of America.

'the videos' to 'videos' optional but fine; 'Tiktok' should be 'TikTok'. 'it talk' is incorrect: use plural 'they talked' to agree with 'videos' and past tense 'talked' to match 'came across'. 'the National Park in United States of America' should be 'a national park in the United States of America'. Suggestion: ensure subject-verb agreement and consistent past tense, and use articles correctly.

× I'm really become a big fan of that place because you know, I can get closer with the nature and.

✓ I really became a big fan of that place because I could get closer to nature.

'I'm really become' is incorrect; use past 'I really became' to match prior past context. 'get closer with the nature' should be 'get closer to nature' and omit 'the'. The sentence ended incomplete; finish the idea. Suggestion: use correct past tense forms, proper preposition 'to' with 'get closer', and avoid unnecessary articles.