旅行— Part 1 评分报告

建议: Be more grammatical, concise and coherent. Start with a clear topic sentence, then give one or two specific supporting details using linking words. Correct tense and article errors and avoid repetition (e.g., don’t repeat “sit by the window”). Aim for natural phrasing and a varied vocabulary (e.g., “scenery” instead of “proper view”).

示例: Yes, I usually prefer a window seat when I travel. For instance, last summer I flew to Cox’s Bazar and chose the window so I could watch the coastline and clouds—I find the scenery calming and it makes the flight more enjoyable.

建议: Provide a clear, grammatical opening sentence, then one or two specific details using linking words. Correct word order and number expressions (e.g., “a 230-kilometre journey”). Avoid awkward phrasing like “I did visit.” Mention feelings or a brief detail to enrich the response.

示例: Yes, I did. When I was a child my family took a long trip of about 230 kilometres to Cox’s Bazar. We travelled by car and I remember stopping at small towns along the way, which made the journey fun and memorable.

× I love to sit by the window when I am travelling.

✓ I love sitting by the window when I travel.

The original uses a mixed continuous form that is less natural here. Use simple present 'I love' with gerund 'sitting' or simple present 'when I travel' for habitual action. Suggestion: use 'I love sitting by the window when I travel' to show a general preference and habitual action.

× For example, the last summer I visit Coxus Bazaar by airplane.

✓ For example, last summer I visited Cox's Bazar by airplane.

This sentence uses present tense 'visit' for a past event and has incorrect article/word form for the place name. Use simple past 'visited' for a completed action in the past. Also 'the last summer' should be 'last summer' and the place name is commonly 'Cox's Bazar'.

× I sit there in the window, sit beside in the window so that I can see the proper view of the outsides and I really enjoy very

✓ I sat by the window so that I could see the view outside, and I really enjoyed it.

The student mixes present and past tenses and has tense-agreement errors. For a past trip use past forms 'sat', 'could', and 'enjoyed'. 'Proper view of the outsides' is awkward; use 'view outside'. Also add object 'it' after 'enjoyed'.

× Yes, since I was a child I had a long journey with my parents.

✓ Yes, when I was a child I took a long trip with my parents.

The original 'since I was a child I had a long journey' mixes 'since' with a single past event incorrectly. Use 'when I was a child' for time reference and 'took a long trip' is more natural than 'had a long journey'.

× It's like two hundred thirty kilometers journey I did visit and this is Cox's Bazaar and I went there with my family and enjoyed very much.

✓ It was about a 230-kilometer journey to Cox's Bazar; I went there with my family and enjoyed it very much.

The original is ungrammatical and run-on. Use past 'It was' for past description, express distance as 'about a 230-kilometer journey', fix place name 'Cox's Bazar', and combine clauses clearly: 'I went there with my family and enjoyed it very much.' Also use 'enjoyed it very much' rather than 'enjoyed very much.'