建筑— Part 1 评分报告

建议: 질문에 직접 답하는 것은 잘 했지만 발화가 중복되고 우물거림(uh, so when I was commuting, so when I'm commuting)과 반복(‘tall building, tall nice buildings’)이 많아 명료성이 떨어집니다. 문장은 1–2개의 명확한 문장으로 간결하게 정리하세요. 또한 관사(a/the)와 복수형 사용을 정확히 하고 장소 이름은 일관되게 말하세요. 연습 방법: 거울 앞에서 하루 일과를 1문장으로 요약하되 불필요한 채우기 말(um/uh)을 줄이는 연습을 하세요.

示例: Yes. I live near Kangamon, and I usually see several tall, modern buildings when I commute every day.

建议: 의도를 잘 전달하려 했지만 문장이 중복되고 문법 오류(‘in interesting’, ‘fascinated for me’)가 있습니다. 장소명도 Huanggamun/Guangdong 혼동이 있어 혼란을 줍니다. 질문에 대한 직접적인 토픽 문장 후, 이유를 분명한 연결사(so, because, therefore)를 사용해 구체적인 설명을 한두 문장만 덧붙이세요. 연습 방법: 찍는 이유(예: 건축 양식, 색감)를 구체적으로 1–2문장으로 준비해 말하기 연습을 하세요.

示例: Yes. I often take photos of buildings because I admire their architectural details and the way light falls on their facades.

建议: 답은 했지만 내용이 모호하고 불필요한 반복(‘they have that have’, ‘uh’)과 어색한 표현(‘in on’)이 많습니다. 방문하고 싶은 이유(예: 전망, 음식, 역사)를 구체적으로 설명하고, 문장을 연결할 때 because, although 같은 연결어를 쓰세요. 연습 방법: 한 건물에 대해 방문 이유와 기대하는 활동을 2문장으로 명확히 정리해 말하는 연습을 하세요.

示例: Yes. I would like to visit a tall building near my neighborhood because it houses a popular pizza restaurant with great views from the upper floors, although it is usually very crowded.

建议: 의견은 분명하지만 반복(‘flat, flat, usually’)과 어색한 연결이 있습니다. 장점(예: view, facilities, quiet)과 단점(예: stairs, elevator crowding)을 한두 문장으로 균형 있게 제시하면 더 설득력 있습니다. 연결어(so, because, however)를 활용해 문장을 깔끔하게 구성하세요. 연습 방법: 장점 하나, 단점 하나를 준비해 2문장 이내로 말하는 연습을 해보세요.

示例: Yes, I would. I prefer living in a flat in a tall building because it offers excellent views of the river or nearby mountains, although it can sometimes be noisy when the elevators are crowded.

× Yes, I live near Kangamon, so when I was commuting, so when I'm commuting every day, I usually, uh, see the tall building, tall nice buildings.

✓ Yes, I live near Kangamon, and when I commute every day, I usually see tall, nice buildings.

The student mixed past continuous and present continuous with awkward repetition. Use simple present for habitual actions: 'when I commute every day, I usually see'. Remove redundant clauses and filler words. Also correct adjective order to 'tall, nice buildings'.

× Yes, as I mentioned umm I I usually see many tall buildings near Huanggamun, so I'm interested in taking pictures of buildings near Guangdong.

✓ Yes, as I mentioned, I usually see many tall buildings near Huanggamun, so I'm interested in taking pictures of buildings there.

Using 'near Guangdong' is likely incorrect because Guangdong is a large region; 'there' or 'near Huanggamun' is clearer. Also add commas and remove duplicate 'I'. Use consistent location reference.

× It's really it's really in interesting and fascinated for me.

✓ It really interests me and I find it interesting.

The original mixes passive and adjective forms incorrectly. Use 'it interests me' or 'I find it interesting'. Avoid repeating 'it's really'.

× Yes, there is a building that I really like to visit. It's a nice tall building. They have uh, that have uh, pizza, nice pizza restaurant.

✓ Yes, there is a building that I would really like to visit. It's a nice tall building and it has a nice pizza restaurant.

Pronoun 'they' is incorrect for a singular building; use 'it'. Use 'has' for possession. Simplify 'that have' to 'it has'. Also choose 'would like to' for preference.

× It's really a delicious pizza restaurant, but uh, there are so many people in on.

✓ It's a very good pizza restaurant, but there are always so many people in it.

Use 'in it' to refer to being inside the restaurant. 'In on' is incorrect. Also 'really a delicious' is awkward; use 'a very good' or 'a delicious'.

× Yes, pretty much. Actually I prefer living in a flat, umm, flat, usually flat, usually made of uh, tall building.

✓ Yes. Actually, I prefer living in a flat, usually in a tall building.

The original repeats words and has incorrect word order 'flat usually made of tall building'. Use 'a flat, usually in a tall building' to express location. Keep simple present 'I prefer'.

× So I prefer living in a tall building. It's, it has a great view like river or Mountain View.

✓ So I prefer living in a tall building. It has a great view, like a river view or a mountain view.

Capitalize 'Mountain' is unnecessary; use 'mountain view'. Include articles 'a river view' and 'a mountain view'. Remove extraneous 'it's,'.