食物— Part 1 评分报告

建议: Be more concise, correct grammar, and add a clear reason with specific detail. Avoid redundancy and filler. Use linking words for coherence. Focus on one main idea (favorite food) and briefly mention alternatives.

示例: My favourite food is steak because I enjoy the rich flavor and high protein it provides. For example, I often choose a grilled ribeye with a side of roasted vegetables on weekends. However, I also enjoy pizza occasionally, especially when it’s freshly baked with tomato, mozzarella and basil after a long week.

建议: Avoid hesitations and finish sentences clearly. Provide a concise topic sentence then specific supporting details about the change and why it happened, using linking words like 'however' and 'now'.

示例: When I was young I loved sweets and fast food such as chocolates, burgers and biscuits. However, as I grew older I started to prefer healthier options; for example, I now choose salads and lean meats because I care more about nutrition and energy levels.

建议: Reduce fillers, correct word choice and sentence structure, and add specific details about seasonal changes. Use linking words such as 'however' or 'but' to contrast habitual eating with seasonal variations.

示例: I usually stick to the same basic diet throughout the year, but I do buy seasonal fruits in summer. For instance, I often buy strawberries and raspberries in July because they are fresher, cheaper and tastier than in other months.

建议: Give a clear, complete answer with correct grammar and one or two specific examples explaining why the change happened. Remove trailing phrases and hesitations.

示例: Yes. As a child I ate a lot of sweets and junk food such as chocolates and biscuits. Over time I adopted a healthier diet with more protein and vegetables; for example, I now prefer grilled chicken with a mixed salad because I want to maintain my health and energy.

× My favorite food is a steak.

✓ My favorite food is steak.

Using the indefinite article 'a' before 'steak' is incorrect when speaking about a food in general. Foods used in a general sense are usually uncountable (no article) or plural. Use 'steak' without 'a' to refer to the food category.

× they keep me more healthier

✓ they keep me healthier

'More healthier' is redundant because 'healthier' is already the comparative form of 'healthy.' Using both 'more' and the comparative '-er' is incorrect. Use 'healthier' alone.

× but sometimes I like pizza to celebrate after a hard week and pizza especially with fresh.

✓ but sometimes I like pizza to celebrate after a hard week, especially when it is fresh.

The original sentence has a fragment 'pizza especially with fresh' and unclear structure. Add a subordinating clause and verb ('when it is') to complete the idea and use a comma before 'especially'. This makes the sentence grammatical and clear.

× When I was a child, I was a big fan of chocolates, burgers, biscuits and all kinds of junk foods.

✓ When I was a child, I was a big fan of chocolate, burgers, biscuits and all kinds of junk food.

'Chocolate' and 'junk food' are usually uncountable when referring to types of food generally, so use singular uncountable form. 'Chocolates' can be correct if referring to individual pieces, but here the general preference suits the uncountable forms.

× However, as I'm getting older, I, uh, developed an appreciation to salads and meat.

✓ However, as I'm getting older, I have developed an appreciation for salads and meat.

The clause 'as I'm getting older' is present progressive and indicates a change that continues to the present, so the present perfect 'have developed' is appropriate. Also, use the preposition 'for' with 'appreciation' rather than 'to.'

× I uh, these days I prefer more.

✓ These days, I prefer them more.

The original lacks a clear object—'prefer more' needs what is preferred. Adding 'them' (referring to salads and meat) completes the sentence. Also remove filler hesitation and add a comma for clarity.

× I don't really change what I eat all year.

✓ I don't really change what I eat throughout the year.

'All year' is understandable but 'throughout the year' is more idiomatic here. This is a minor pronoun/phrase choice to improve naturalness.

× I say I eat the same food uh, but uh, some seasonal uh, fruits, uh, I buy them umm in the summer like strawberries and raspberries because they are cheaper and more taste.

✓ I usually eat the same foods, but I buy some seasonal fruits in the summer, like strawberries and raspberries, because they are cheaper and tastier.

Multiple issues: 'the same food' is better as 'the same foods' (general plural), 'some seasonal fruits' positions improved, remove filler words, and use comparative adjective 'tastier' rather than 'more taste.' Also consolidate into a single clear sentence and add commas for readability.

× When I was a child I used to eat more carbohydrates and sugars like chocolates, biscuits and all kind of junk foods.

✓ When I was a child I used to eat more carbohydrates and sugar, like chocolate, biscuits and all kinds of junk food.

Use uncountable forms 'sugar' and 'chocolate' for general categories. Change 'all kind' to 'all kinds' and 'junk foods' to 'junk food' (uncountable) for correct pluralization and natural expression.

× But gradually I developed a healthier diet includes more protein and vegetables like salads or maybe.

✓ But gradually I developed a healthier diet that includes more protein and vegetables, like salads.

The clause requires a relative pronoun 'that' to link 'a healthier diet' and 'includes.' Also remove the trailing 'or maybe' which is incomplete. Use present tense 'includes' to describe the current content of the diet while 'developed' remains past for the change.