走路— Part 1 评分报告

建议: 在回答时要更直接和简洁，避免频繁的填充词（uh, um）和重复信息。先用一句明确的主题句回答问题，然后给出一两句具体原因或细节，注意时态与词汇的准确性（例如 spare time to walk 而不是 to work）。

示例: No, I don't walk a lot because I work long hours during the week. I usually feel too tired after work, and I don’t have much free time for exercise, so I often drive or take public transport instead.

建议: 回答要注意时态一致（过去时），並且说明具体细节以增强内容（例如和谁去、去哪儿、玩什么）。避免句子重复和语法错误。

示例: Yes, I did. When I was a child I spent a lot of time playing outdoors with my neighbours in the local park. Those walks and games with friends are among my fondest memories because I had more free time back then.

建议: 回答应更有条理，使用连接词（for example, because, so）并给出具体原因和例子。注意词汇搭配（scenery 单数，riverside，不要用 business issue）。避免模糊或不连贯的表达。

示例: People like walking in parks because the scenery is peaceful and natural. For example, parks often have trees and riversides where visitors can relax, get fresh air, and escape the stress of work.

建议: 先直接回答问题，然后用一两句具体理由支持答案。注意用词和语法（get stressed out 表示变得有压力，应为 relieve stress；long arms works 无意义，应改为 long hours of work；fresh breaths → fresh breath/ fresh air）。

示例: I would choose the park near my home because it has a lovely riverside. Walking there helps me relax and relieves the stress from long hours of work, and the fresh air is very refreshing.

建议: 回答要用正确的时态（lately → present perfect or past simple for recent activity）並避免重复。提供具体时间或频率会更好（e.g., last weekend, every evening）。注意短语搭配（breathe fresh air；released → relieved）。

示例: Lately I have been going to the park near my home almost every evening because it has a nice riverside. Walking there lets me breathe fresh air and helps me feel relieved after long workdays.

× Uh, no, I don't 'cause I'm, uh, how to say I'm an employee and I have to, uh, work every week, so I don't have spare time to work.

✓ Uh, no, I don't, 'cause I'm an employee and I have to work every week, so I don't have spare time.

句中重复使用不必要的动词“work”（“have spare time to work”与前文“I have to work every week”含义重复）。另外口语缩略“'cause”可保留，但应避免冗余短语。建议简化为“I don't, 'cause I'm an employee and I have to work every week, so I don't have spare time.” 这样更清晰。

× That's really a pity for me, 'cause I have 'cause I'm getting lots of weight.

✓ That's really a pity for me, 'cause I'm getting a lot of weight.

使用现在进行时“I'm getting”表示体重逐渐增加是合理，但原句中有重复的“'cause”和非标准表达“lots of weight”。应将“lots of weight”改为更自然的“a lot of weight”。说明：保持现在进行时态并删去多余词。

× Well, yes I do. I did 'cause when I was a child I really have lots of time to to work and play with other children.

✓ Well, yes I did, 'cause when I was a child I really had a lot of time to play with other children.

叙述过去经历时应使用过去时态。原句混用了“do/did”和现在时“have”。应把“have”改为过去式“had”；“to to work and play”有多余“work”且与儿童活动不符，删去并改为“to play”。同时“a lot of”比“lots of”更口语且更准确。

× So that's really good memories for me, 'cause when I grow up I don't have much time to work.

✓ So those are really good memories for me, 'cause when I grew up I didn't have much time to play.

“memories”复数时主语需用复数谓语“those are”。描述小时候的情况要用过去时，“when I grew up”应为“when I grew up”或更准确为“after I grew up”；原句“don't have much time to work”时态和语义不匹配，应改为过去时“didn't have much time to play/work”并根据上下文选词，这里改为“play”。

× Uh, because the parks have really beautiful natural sceneries and uh, riversides often and uh, usually many people are full time employees and they are really tired of, uh, they're getting involved in the business issue.

✓ Uh, because parks have really beautiful natural scenery and often riversides, and usually many people are full-time employees and they're really tired because they're involved in business issues.

“sceneries”应为不可数名词“scenery”；“the parks”若泛指改为“parks”或指特定公园保留定冠词。“riversides often”语序不自然，应为“often riversides”或“often have riversides”。“full time”需连字符“full-time”。“business issue”应为复数或复合名词“business issues”。总体调整使名词单复数与语序正确。

× I definitely choose the park, especially the park near my home 'cause this park has really beautiful Riverside and I can get stressed out from the long arms works and fresh breaths of fresh air to relax.

✓ I would definitely choose the park, especially the park near my home, 'cause this park has a really beautiful riverside and I can relieve stress from long hours of work and enjoy fresh air to relax.

需要使用条件式“would”表假设（Where would you like... if you had the chance）。“Riverside”不应大写且通常为单数“riverside”或“riverfront”；“long arms works”是错误搭配，应为“long hours of work”。“fresh breaths of fresh air”冗余，改为“enjoy fresh air”。此外调整短语顺序更自然。

× I usually go to the park near my home 'cause, uh, it has really beautiful Riverside and I can breathe new or fresh air from it.

✓ I usually go to the park near my home 'cause it has a really beautiful riverside and I can breathe fresh air there.

“Riverside”不应大写并需不带冠词或用“a”；“breathe new or fresh air”中“new”不自然，保留“fresh air”。从公园“breathe air from it”语序不自然，改为“breathe fresh air there”。时态“usually go”是正确的，只需修正名词和搭配。

× It really makes me feel released from the long hour jobs and works.

✓ It really makes me feel relieved from long hours of work.

“feel released”用法不当，应为“feel relieved”。“long hour jobs and works”应为“long hours of work”或“long working hours”。合并重复词并使用正确形容词形式。