走路— Part 1 评分报告

建议: Cải thiện: (1) Trả lời trực tiếp với một câu chủ đề rõ ràng (ví dụ: “Yes, I walk a lot, especially in the mornings.”). (2) Sử dụng ngữ pháp đúng (work → walk; word order; comparative forms). (3) Hạn chế lặp từ và nói rõ các ý cụ thể, tránh câu mơ hồ (ví dụ “when you go rock a lot” không rõ nghĩa). (4) Dùng liên từ đơn giản để nối ý (for example, because, so). Cụ thể thực hành: viết 2–3 câu hỗ trợ với thông tin chi tiết về tần suất, lợi ích thể chất và tinh thần, và một ví dụ cụ thể.

示例: Yes, I walk a lot, especially in the mornings. I usually walk for 30–40 minutes three or four times a week because it improves my fitness and reduces stress. For example, after a brisk morning walk I feel more energetic and focused for the day.

建议: Cải thiện: (1) Mở đầu bằng câu trực tiếp trả lời câu hỏi (Yes/No + short statement). (2) Chỉnh ngữ pháp thời quá khứ (when I was a child; I often went). (3) Tránh lặp từ và dùng cụm từ chính xác (family, strengthen bonds). (4) Thêm một chi tiết cụ thể (đi đâu, làm gì) để câu thêm sống động.

示例: Yes, I often went for walks as a child with my friends and family. We used to stroll around our neighborhood park every weekend, and I enjoyed those walks because they kept me active and helped me build closer relationships with my relatives.

建议: Cải thiện: (1) Trả lời trực tiếp với nguyên nhân rõ ràng (because...). (2) Dùng từ vựng chính xác (traffic, cars, peaceful, fresh air). (3) Sắp xếp câu rõ ràng, tránh câu rời rạc; dùng liên từ (so, because, and). (4) Thêm một ví dụ cụ thể hoặc lợi ích cụ thể (không khí trong lành, chỗ cho trẻ chơi).

示例: People like walking in parks because they are peaceful and away from traffic. Parks usually have many trees and open spaces, which provide fresh air and a safe place to exercise or relax. For example, parents often take their children to parks because there is plenty of room to play.

建议: Cải thiện: (1) Trả lời giả định bằng câu điều kiện đúng (If I had the chance, I would…). (2) Sử dụng cấu trúc chính xác và mạch lạc (from the north to the south of Vietnam). (3) Giải thích lý do ngắn gọn, tránh filler (“uh”, “is”). (4) Nên nêu thời gian hoặc cách thực hiện cụ thể để tăng tính thuyết phục.

示例: If I had the chance, I would walk from the north to the south of Vietnam. I want to do this because I have seen videos that show amazing landscapes and I think it would be an unforgettable cultural and physical challenge. I would plan it as a long trip over several weeks to enjoy the scenery.

建议: Cải thiện: (1) Bắt đầu bằng câu quá khứ rõ ràng (Yesterday afternoon I went for a walk...). (2) Dùng từ vựng chính xác (hike up the mountain / to the mountain, not pick the mountain). (3) Tránh filler (uh) và lặp từ; mô tả ngắn gọn, cụ thể (views, trail, weather). (4) Thêm cảm xúc ngắn gọn và một chi tiết cụ thể (a moment or sight you liked).

示例: Yesterday afternoon I went for a walk with my parents up a nearby mountain. The trail offered majestic landscapes and beautiful views of the city, and the cool weather made the hike very enjoyable. I felt really happy, especially when we reached a viewpoint with a wide panorama.

× To be honest I worked a lot especially in the morning because I find it.

✓ To be honest, I walked a lot, especially in the morning, because I found it helpful.

'Worked' is past tense but context refers to walking; use 'walked' for past action. 'I find it' should match past tense 'I found it'. Also need 'helpful' as an adjective to complete the idea.

× I find walking help me become more fitness and help my mental and physical become more better.

✓ I find walking helps me become fitter and helps my mental and physical health improve.

'Walking' is correct as a gerund, but the verb after a singular subject must be third person singular 'helps' (subject-verb agreement). 'More fitness' is incorrect; use comparative 'fitter' and 'more better' is redundant; use 'improve' for clarity.

× For example, when you go rock a lot they can enhance their immune system and make friends.

✓ For example, when people go hiking or rock-climbing a lot, they can strengthen their immune systems and make friends.

Original sentence is unclear and contains wrong noun 'rock' and pronoun mismatch. Clarify the activity (hiking or rock-climbing), use plural 'people' and plural possessive 'their immune systems' for agreement.

× In my recollection, when a kid, I often go outside to have a walk with my friends and my families walk while walking with them.

✓ In my recollection, when I was a kid, I often went outside to walk with my friends and family.

Childhood reference requires past tense 'was' and 'went'. 'Families' is incorrect; use 'family' as a collective noun. The phrase 'walk while walking with them' is redundant; simplify to 'walk with them'.

× I felt very happy because I'm I'm not only working for my health but also I can strengthen and bond with their relationship.

✓ I felt very happy because I was not only exercising for my health but also strengthening bonds in my relationships.

Mixes tenses and pronouns: use past tense 'was' to match 'felt'. 'Working' is wrong here; 'exercising' fits. 'Strengthen and bond with their relationship' is incorrect pronoun and structure; use 'strengthening bonds in my relationships'.

× To be honest, people like to walk in park because park is a public space where transport can't go to display.

✓ To be honest, people like to walk in parks because a park is a public space where vehicles do not go.

Use plural 'parks' or 'a park'. 'Transport can't go to display' is ungrammatical; better: 'vehicles do not go' or 'vehicles are not allowed'.

× So it's very safe for people to practice exercise and work here.

✓ So it's very safe for people to exercise and relax here.

'Practice exercise and work' is awkward; use verb 'exercise'. 'Work here' doesn't fit park context; 'relax' is more appropriate.

× And in the park is have a lot of trees, so you know.

✓ And in the park there are a lot of trees, so you know.

Correct 'there is/are' structure: plural 'trees' requires 'there are'. Remove extraneous 'is'.

× If I have a child, I would like to take a long walk from the northern of Vietnam to the southern of Vietnam because I watch a lot of video related to it and I found it very is, uh, unbelievable experience for me and I will try back to in the for in the future to do it.

✓ If I had the chance, I would like to walk from the north of Vietnam to the south because I have watched a lot of videos about it and I find it an unbelievable experience, so I will try to do it in the future.

Mixed conditional and tense errors: use 'If I had the chance' (unreal present) or 'If I have a child' depends on meaning; corrected to 'If I had the chance' to match 'would like'. Use 'have watched' for present perfect, 'find' present, 'an unbelievable experience' (article), and 'try to do it' as correct infinitive form.

× In my regulation, uh, in the, in the afternoon yesterday, I went for a walk with my parents to pick the mountain and I thought this place is very great, uh, with majestic landscape and, uh, beautiful city views and I found very happy here.

✓ Yesterday afternoon, I went for a walk with my parents to climb the mountain, and I thought this place was great, with a majestic landscape and beautiful city views, and I felt very happy there.

'Regulation' is wrong word; use 'yesterday afternoon'. 'Pick the mountain' should be 'climb the mountain'. Maintain past tense 'was' and 'felt'. Use 'there' not 'here' when referring to the place in past context.