走路— Part 1 评分报告

建议: Be concise, correct grammar and avoid repetition. Start with a clear topic sentence, then give one or two supporting details. Use correct verb forms and singular/plural agreement.

示例: Yes, I walk every day because I live on a hill and the nearest bus stop is downhill. Usually I walk down in the morning and back up in the evening, which gives me some daily exercise.

建议: Use clearer grammar and a coherent structure: state the main idea, then explain with specific details and correct tense. Avoid confusing phrases like "so that really let me"; use linking words such as "because" or "so".

示例: Not really. Because my parents were very overprotective, they often drove me to and from school, so I had few chances to walk or play outside with friends during primary school.

建议: Give a clear topic sentence and support with specific reasons and examples. Use natural collocations (e.g., "clear your mind", "connect with nature"). Use linking words like "for example" or "also" correctly.

示例: People enjoy walking in parks because it helps clear their mind and reduce stress. For example, a morning walk offers fresh air and a chance to connect with nature, and many people also walk their dogs there for exercise and company.

建议: Organise your answer: start with the place, then give two specific reasons with proper grammar and vocabulary. Correct article use and subject-verb agreement ("the sea views are pretty," "fresh air is relaxing"). Avoid hesitations like "uh."

示例: I would walk along the new seaside pathway near my home. I like it because the sea views are beautiful and the fresh air is very relaxing in the morning, and many local residents use it so it feels safe and friendly.

建议: Be direct: name the place and give specific recent details in correct tense and word order. Remove repetition and fix grammar ("newly developed garden", "after class"). Use linking words to connect ideas.

示例: Lately I walked in the newly developed garden near CityU. After class I often go there with friends to chat and grab lunch while enjoying the sea views, which is very relaxing.

× Since I am living on the hill, I need to walk down the hill to take bus to school.

✓ Since I live on the hill, I need to walk down the hill to take the bus to school.

Use simple present 'I live' for a permanent or habitual situation rather than present continuous 'I am living'. Also include the definite article 'the' before 'bus' because a specific bus service to school is implied.

× That's my usual way to go to school.

✓ That's my usual way of going to school.

Use the noun phrase 'way of going' rather than 'way to go' when describing a habitual method; 'way to go' is not ungrammatical but 'way of going' is more natural here.

× That's the reason indeed, I work a lot every day and it is the usual ways to travel from my home place to school.

✓ That's the reason. Indeed, I work a lot every day, and it is the usual way to travel from my home to school.

Split into two sentences for clarity. 'Ways' should be singular 'way' to match 'it is'. 'Home place' is unnatural; use 'home'. Ensure subject-verb agreement and clear sentence boundary.

× Not really. When I was young, my parents were very overprotective, so that really let me have a walk with my friends, even in my primary.

✓ Not really. When I was young, my parents were very overprotective, so they didn't really let me walk with my friends, even in primary school.

Use negative past ('didn't let') to express lack of permission in the past. 'Let me have a walk' is awkward; 'let me walk' is clearer. Specify 'primary school' for natural phrasing.

× In primary school they usually drove me home, so I didn't have much opportunity to go out for a walk.

✓ In primary school they usually drove me home, so I didn't have many opportunities to go out for a walk.

Use plural 'opportunities' because 'much' with countable noun is incorrect; use 'many opportunities'. Tense is correct.

× Well, in general it is a usual way people go for walk in the park to refresh their mind during early morning.

✓ Well, in general it is a usual way for people to go for a walk in the park to refresh their minds in the early morning.

Insert 'for' before 'people' and add the article 'a' before 'walk'. Use plural 'minds' to match 'people'. Use 'in the early morning' for natural time expression.

× Also it is a convenient way they can approach the nature positively.

✓ Also it is a convenient way for them to approach nature positively.

Use 'for them to' to introduce the subject of the infinitive. Remove the article before 'nature' because 'nature' here is uncountable and does not need 'the'.

× That's why people like to have a morning walk and also walk a dog in the park.

✓ That's why people like to have a morning walk and also walk their dog in the park.

Use possessive pronoun 'their' to show whose dog is being walked; without it the sentence is less clear.

× There is a long seaside pathway near my place where I live.

✓ There is a long seaside pathway near where I live.

Reduce redundancy: 'near my place where I live' is repetitive. 'Near where I live' is concise and natural.

× It is uh developed from the local council recently.

✓ It was developed by the local council recently.

Use past passive 'was developed' for a completed action. Use preposition 'by' to indicate the agent 'the local council'. 'Uh' removed for formality.

× I would like to walk because the sea views is so pretty and the fresh air are very relaxing when you have a walk during morning time.

✓ I would like to walk because the sea views are so pretty and the fresh air is very relaxing when you take a walk in the morning.

Match plural 'views' with verb 'are' and singular 'air' with 'is'. Use 'take a walk' and 'in the morning' for natural phrasing. Maintain second-person vs first-person consistency: use general 'you' or keep first-person; here 'you' is acceptable as a general statement.

× Also some of residents would walk.

✓ Also some of the residents would walk there.

Include definite article 'the' with 'residents'. Add 'there' for clarity of location.

× Since I am a student at City U in Hong Kong, there is a new developed garden recently.

✓ Since I am a student at City U in Hong Kong, a newly developed garden was built nearby recently.

Use 'a newly developed garden' and past tense 'was built' or 'opened' for a completed recent development. 'There is ... recently' is incorrect combination of present and recent past.

× I love to have a walk when when after class over there I can chat with my friends and grab lunch over there to enjoy the sea views, which is so relaxing.

✓ I love to take a walk there after class so I can chat with my friends and grab lunch to enjoy the sea views, which are so relaxing.

Use 'take a walk' rather than 'have a walk'. Remove duplicated 'when'. Use 'there' once for clarity. Change 'which is' to 'which are' to agree with plural 'sea views'.