爱好— Part 1 评分报告

建议: Be more natural and specific. Start with a clear topic sentence, use correct grammar (e.g. say “For example” instead of “example”), and give one or two brief supporting details about why you enjoy those hobbies. Keep it under five sentences and avoid listing without context.

示例: Yes, I have several hobbies. For example, I enjoy drawing because it helps me relax and express my ideas, and I play the guitar to unwind and accompany my singing.

建议: Correct tense and vocabulary mistakes and be concise. Use past tense to describe childhood (e.g. “When I was a child I liked…”). Remove unclear words like “corpus.” Give one specific detail about how you did the hobby or who you did it with.

示例: Yes. When I was a child, I liked playing the piano and cooking with my family. My parents taught me simple recipes and I practiced piano every weekend.

建议: Organize the answer with a clear topic sentence and use correct grammar. State which hobby you've kept since childhood, then briefly explain why it continued to the present. Use linking words (for example, because, so) and avoid fragmented phrases.

示例: Yes, I have had a hobby since childhood: playing the piano. I continued because it helped me focus and gave me confidence, and later I also enjoyed drawing and figure skating as additional creative outlets.

建议: This answer is clear but can be improved by using smoother phrasing and a linking contrast. Begin with a direct statement, then give two short specific examples and a brief reason or result.

示例: No, my hobbies are mostly different from my family’s. However, I sometimes draw with my little sister and we enjoy cooking together on weekends, which brings us closer.

× Yes, I have many hobbies, example drawing and playing guitar.

✓ Yes, I have many hobbies, for example drawing and playing the guitar.

This sentence has a sentence structure issue and article omission. Use 'for example' to introduce examples. Also include the definite article 'the' before musical instruments when speaking generally about playing them in this context. Improve by saying 'for example' and 'the guitar'.

× Yes, I have a corpus.

✓ Yes, I have a collection.

'Corpus' is not the correct word for hobbies; it means a body of texts. This is a word choice/vocabulary error related to present-tense description. Replace with 'collection' or 'set' to correctly convey many hobbies.

× When I've been a child, I like to playing piano and cooking with my family.

✓ When I was a child, I liked to play the piano and cook with my family.

Multiple tense and form errors: 'I've been a child' uses present perfect incorrectly; use simple past 'I was a child'. 'I like to playing' mixes 'like' with gerund incorrectly in past context; use past 'liked' and the base verb 'play' or gerund 'playing' consistently. Also add 'the' before 'piano'.

× Yes, I have a hobby. Well, I sense childhood or it is playing piano and.

✓ Yes, I've had a hobby since childhood: playing the piano.

Sentence structure and tense errors: 'I sense childhood' is incorrect word choice; use 'since childhood' to indicate duration. Combine into a single clear sentence and use present perfect 'I've had' for an activity that started in the past and continues. Add 'the' before 'piano'.

× Drawing and figure skating alike with because it just helped me.

✓ I also enjoy drawing and figure skating because they helped me a lot.

This sentence is ungrammatical and disordered. Reorder to subject-verb-object, use plural pronoun 'they' to refer to two activities, and include 'because' to show reason. Add 'a lot' for clarity. Use past tense 'helped' if referring to past benefit.

× No, I don't have same hobbies as my family members, but I like drawing with my little sister and I like cooking with my family.

✓ No, I don't have the same hobbies as my family members, but I like drawing with my little sister and cooking with my family.

Missing definite article 'the' before 'same hobbies' is an article error. Also the second clause repeats 'I like' unnecessarily; combine verbs for conciseness. Ensure parallel structure: 'drawing with my little sister and cooking with my family.'