爱好— Part 1 评分报告

建议: Be more concise and correct grammatical errors. Start with a clear topic sentence, then give one or two specific supporting details using linking words. Avoid redundancy (e.g., "having hobbies" repeated) and correct verb forms ("help" → "helps", "learning" → "learn").

示例: I have several hobbies, including playing sports, listening to music, and cooking. For example, I play basketball twice a week to stay fit, and I cook on weekends to try new recipes, which helps me relax and learn new skills.

建议: Organize your answer with a clear past-tense topic sentence and use specific examples. Fix unclear or incorrect phrases (e.g., "it's allowed me" → "they allowed me", "playing for more" unclear, "Commonwealth" seems irrelevant). Keep to past tense and avoid confusing or unrelated words.

示例: Yes. As a child I enjoyed drawing, painting and reading. Painting allowed me to express my creativity, and I often played football with friends after school, which kept me active. My parents encouraged these hobbies by taking me to art classes and weekend matches.

建议: Answer directly and clearly. Remove irrelevant or confusing words ("from China"). Use past tense for childhood hobbies and present tense for current ones, and avoid filler sounds like "Uh". Give a brief reason for the change.

示例: No, I don't follow any childhood hobby now. When I was a child I collected stamps, but I stopped collecting as I grew older because my interests shifted. Nowadays I prefer playing sports and listening to music for relaxation.

建议: Good clear response with examples. Improve grammar ("help" → "helps"), specify what "boat games" are or use clearer term (e.g., "boating" or "rowing"). Add a linking phrase to show result (e.g., "so" or "which").

示例: Yes, we share many hobbies, such as watching movies and cooking together. On weekends we sometimes go hiking or go boating, which is fun and helps us bond as a family.

× I find that having hobbies help me relax after a busy day at home and it also gives me the chance to meet new people and learning new skills.

✓ I find that having hobbies helps me relax after a busy day at home and they also give me the chance to meet new people and learn new skills.

Subject-verb agreement with gerund phrase: 'having hobbies' is treated as singular so needs 'helps' (Grammar problem ID 8 and 27). Also parallel structure: 'meet' and 'learn' should both be base verbs after 'to', so use 'learn' not 'learning'. Use 'they' to refer back to 'hobbies' (plural) so 'give' is plural. Improve by keeping parallel verb forms and matching subjects and verbs.

× For example, I love drawing and painting and cooking because it's allowed me to express my creativity.

✓ For example, I loved drawing and painting and cooking because they allowed me to express my creativity.

The question asks about childhood hobbies, so past tense should be used (Grammar problem ID 5). 'It's allowed me' is present perfect and mismatches tense; change to 'they allowed me'. Also use plural pronoun 'they' to refer to multiple hobbies. Ensure consistent past tense for clarity.

× I also enjoy playing for more with my friends after school and reading.

✓ I also enjoyed playing more with my friends after school and reading.

The phrase 'playing for more' is incorrect; 'playing more' or 'playing games' is correct (Grammar problem ID 11). Also align tense to past 'enjoyed' because discussing childhood. Remove extraneous word 'for'.

× Commonwealth was one of my favorite pastimes.

✓ Playing in the commonwealth games was one of my favorite pastimes.

The single word 'Commonwealth' is unclear and creates a sentence structure problem (Grammar problem ID 26). Likely the student meant 'Commonwealth Games' or an activity related to 'Commonwealth'; clarify by specifying the activity. If they meant a proper noun, use full phrase; ensure sentence makes sense.

× My parents even encouraged me to run the whole thing, which I really appreciated.

✓ My parents even encouraged me to run the whole thing, which I really appreciated.

No grammatical change needed if context refers to an event; however, ensure 'run the whole thing' is clear. Pronoun use is acceptable here. (Grammar problem ID 12).

× No, I don't have a hobby from China.

✓ No, I don't have a hobby from childhood.

The original 'from China' is likely a miswording; 'from childhood' fits the question about a hobby since childhood. This is an article/word choice/context issue (Grammar problem ID 22). Use appropriate noun phrase to match context.

× My my hobbies have changed and now I prefer playing sports or listening music.

✓ My hobbies have changed and now I prefer playing sports or listening to music.

Remove duplicate 'My'. Use 'listening to music' with correct preposition 'to' (Grammar problem IDs 6 and 11). Present perfect 'have changed' is correct; maintain present 'prefer'. Ensure correct verb-preposition collocation.

× Yes, I have the same hobbies as my family.

✓ Yes, I share some hobbies with my family.

Original is grammatical but slightly awkward; 'share some hobbies with my family' is more natural and precise (Grammar problem ID 6). No tense change required.

× On weekends we sometimes go hiking or play boat games.

✓ On weekends we sometimes go hiking or play boating games.

Parallel structure: 'go hiking' pairs with 'go boating' better than 'play boat games' (Grammar problem ID 8). Use consistent gerund forms or 'play' with a correct object like 'boat games' is uncommon; 'go boating' is natural.

× It's fun and help us get closer.

✓ It's fun and helps us get closer.

Subject 'it' (the activity) is singular, so the verb should be 'helps' rather than 'help' (Grammar problem ID 27). Maintain subject-verb agreement.