鞋子— Part 1 评分报告

建议: Be more concise and structure your response with a clear topic sentence, then one or two specific supporting details. Reduce hesitations and unnecessary lists. Use linking words (for example, “mainly”, “but also”) to make the answer coherent. Aim for 2–4 sentences and avoid filler words.

示例: I don't buy shoes very often; I mainly choose comfortable ones. For example, I prefer orthopedic shoes for daily wear, but I also own a few heels and sandals for special occasions.

建议: Provide a complete, coherent answer with fewer hesitations and a clear time frame. Start with a direct topic sentence, then give one or two specific reasons or outcomes. Avoid trailing off and finish your thought. Use linking words like “because” and “so” correctly.

示例: Yes, I used to buy shoes online from the USA because they were much cheaper and I could find good bargains. However, now I usually buy shoes in local stores so I can try them on before purchasing.

建议: Give a clear, structured answer: start with a general statement about variation, then give a specific average and one example of a higher-cost item. Remove hesitations and finish sentences fully. Use linking words like “for example” or “however”.

示例: It depends on the type, but on average I spend about €100 per pair. For example, I might pay more for boots, whereas sandals usually cost less.

建议: Answer directly and give a clear reason with a concise explanation. Reduce repetition and hesitations and use linking words like “because” and “so” to connect ideas. Provide one short example of how this affects your choices.

示例: I prefer comfortable shoes because I have knee problems and flat feet. So I choose supportive footwear, such as orthopedic shoes, rather than fashionable but uncomfortable styles.

× I'm not keen on buying a bunch of different shoes, I just love comfortable shoes, so I buy orthopedic shoes and of course I have some heels and sandals, sneakers and so on.

✓ I'm not keen on buying lots of different shoes; I just prefer comfortable ones, so I buy orthopedic shoes, and of course I also have some heels, sandals, and sneakers.

Run-on sentence and awkward wording: multiple clauses joined with commas create a comma splice. Also 'a bunch of' is informal and 'comfortable shoes' repeated is wordy. Suggest using a semicolon or period to separate independent clauses, replace 'a bunch of' with 'lots of' or 'many', and use 'comfortable ones' to avoid repetition. List items should be separated with commas and include 'also' for clarity.

× Yeah, uh, in some period of time, I, I used to order shoes, uh, from USA, uh, because it was cheap and uh, uh, I, I could get really bargain. So for now I just go to the.

✓ Yes, for a period of time I used to order shoes from the USA because they were cheap and I could get great bargains. Now I just go to the shops.

Multiple problems: 'for USA' should be 'from the USA' (preposition and article), 'it was cheap' should be 'they were cheap' to agree with plural 'shoes', and 'get really bargain' is incorrect collocation; use 'get great bargains'. 'So for now I just go to the.' is incomplete; complete the sentence to 'Now I just go to the shops.' Use past tense consistently for past habitual actions ('used to order', 'were').

× Umm, it depends, uh, on which type of shoes I'm buying. Uh, but approximately I spent €100 per pair of shoes. Uh, if it's, uh, boots, of course I will spend more, but for Sandal?

✓ It depends on which type of shoes I'm buying, but I usually spend about €100 per pair. If they're boots, of course I spend more, but for sandals I spend less.

Tense inconsistency: 'it depends' and 'I'm buying' are present, but 'I spent €100' is past; change to present habitual 'I usually spend'. 'If it's, uh, boots' mixes singular 'it' with plural 'boots' — use 'if they're boots'. 'Sandal' should be plural 'sandals'. Also clarify comparative phrase 'I spend less' rather than a question fragment.

× Of course comfortable because I have, uh, some problems with my knees, umm, and I have a flat, uh, uh, soil. So, uh, I'm, I'm suffering in uh, uncomfortable shoes.

✓ Of course comfortable, because I have some problems with my knees and flat feet. So I suffer when I wear uncomfortable shoes.

'I have a flat, soil' is incorrect word choice; the correct term is 'flat feet'. 'I'm suffering in uncomfortable shoes' is unnatural — use 'I suffer when I wear uncomfortable shoes' or 'they cause me pain'. Also remove filler words and make sentence complete by adding subject and verb correctly.