工作— Part 1 评分报告

建议: Be clearer and concise: start with a direct topic sentence, correct vocabulary (e.g., 'major' not 'measure'), and avoid repetition. Use one or two supporting details and a linking word if needed. Also check word forms (electrical/electronic) and word order.

示例: I am a student at TMU, where I study electrical and electronic engineering. I attend classes five days a week, and I enjoy subjects like science, mathematics and English, so I often spend extra time practicing them.

建议: Give a clear direct response naming the place, then add one concise detail about travel using correct grammar and a linking word. Fix word order and unnecessary fragments.

示例: My school is in Minami-Osawa. I usually take the train from Kyoto, and the journey takes about 30 minutes.

建议: Begin with a direct answer, then provide specific reasons using linking words. Avoid repeating articles and plural/singular mistakes (e.g., 'many spaces'). Add a concrete example of the natural surroundings to be more vivid.

示例: Yes, it's a good place to study because the campus is large and there are many quiet study spaces. Also, the natural surroundings, such as nearby trees and a small park, help me feel relaxed while I study.

建议: Answer directly, then explain clearly. Use correct grammar for plural/singular and relative clauses (e.g., 'students who are from different majors'). Give a specific reason or example of how mixing with students from other majors helps you.

示例: Yes, I like studying there because many students are from different majors, so I can meet a variety of people. For example, I often discuss projects with students from business and design, which gives me new perspectives.

建议: Start with a clear topic sentence about your plans, then give specific steps or reasons. Use correct verb forms and avoid repetition. Mention where or in what field you want to go abroad to make it more concrete.

示例: I plan to work abroad after graduation to meet people from different countries. Therefore, I need to improve my English and deepen my knowledge in my major so I can find suitable international job opportunities.

× I'm a student of TMU.

✓ I'm a student at TMU.

Incorrect use of preposition (Grammar problem type 11). Use 'at' for being enrolled or attending a university. Suggestion: say 'a student at [university]'.

× I go to school five days a week and my measure is electronical and electronic engineering.

✓ I go to school five days a week and my major is electrical and electronic engineering.

Incorrect use of words and adjectives (Grammar problem type 13) and incorrect word choice. 'Measure' is wrong; the correct noun is 'major'. 'Electronical' is not standard; use 'electrical'. Suggestion: use 'my major is electrical and electronic engineering'.

× I like to learn about science and mathematics and English.

✓ I like learning about science, mathematics and English.

Incorrect verb form preference (Grammar problem type 8/13). 'Like to learn' is acceptable but 'like learning' is more natural with subjects. Also punctuation: use commas to separate items. Suggestion: use 'I like learning about...' or 'I like to learn...' consistently.

× I my school is located in Munami Osawa so I go there by train from Kyoto for it takes for about 30 minutes to go.

✓ My school is located in Munami Osawa, so I go there by train from Kyoto; it takes about 30 minutes to get there.

Sentence structure errors (Grammar problem type 26) and incorrect phrasing. Remove extra pronoun 'I' at start, fix connector punctuation, and use 'it takes about 30 minutes to get there' for natural timing expression. Suggestion: split long sentence into clearer clauses and use 'get there' or 'travel there'.

× Yes, I think it's a good place to study because there are the school is large and there are many space to study and also the nature is good.

✓ Yes, I think it's a good place to study because the school is large, there is lots of space to study, and the natural surroundings are pleasant.

Article and agreement errors (Grammar problem types 17 and 1) and incorrect noun number/form (Grammar problem type 1). 'There are the school is large' is redundant and ungrammatical; use 'the school is large'. 'Many space' should be 'lots of space' or 'a lot of space' (space is uncountable). 'Nature is good' is awkward; use 'natural surroundings are pleasant'. Suggestion: use correct articles, uncountable noun forms, and concise clauses.

× I feel relaxed when I see the nature.

✓ I feel relaxed when I see nature.

Incorrect article use with 'nature' (Grammar problem type 17) and unnecessary 'the'. Use 'see nature' or 'see the natural scenery'. Suggestion: omit 'the' before 'nature' or rephrase as 'see the natural scenery'.

× Yes, I'd like the place where I work because there are many students that is differ from my major, so I can make friends, various friends.

✓ Yes, I like the place where I study because there are many students who are from different majors, so I can make various friends.

Multiple sentence structure and agreement errors (Grammar problem types 26 and 27). Use 'like' rather than 'I'd like' for current preference, 'work' should be 'study' given context. 'Many students that is differ from my major' has wrong relative pronoun and verb agreement; use 'students who are from different majors'. 'Make friends, various friends' is awkward; use 'make various friends' or 'make friends from different majors'. Suggestion: use correct relative clauses and consistent verbs.

× It is good for me to talk.

✓ It is good for me to talk with them.

Incomplete meaning and pronoun omission (Grammar problem type 12 and 26). Sentence is grammatically simple but vague; adding 'with them' clarifies who. Suggestion: specify the object of 'talk'.

× My future work plans is to go abroad and make many friends, so I I need to study English harder from now on and I need to learn more about my major.

✓ My future work plans are to go abroad and make many friends, so I need to study English harder from now on and learn more about my major.

Subject-verb agreement error (Grammar problem type 27) and repetition/wordiness. 'Plans' is plural so verb should be 'are'. Remove duplicated 'I' and the repeated 'I need to'. Suggestion: use 'plans are' and streamline the second clause: 'so I need to study English harder and learn more about my major'.