Part 1
Giám khảo
Where do you go to relax recently?
Thí sinh
Definitely my bed. Do you know that sleeping on the bed or relaxing on the bed is the most clothed thing in the world and I'm doing the same thing and it really can clean my mind and let me start everything from zero.
Giám khảo
Who do you usually relax with?
Thí sinh
Maybe I only dress with my pets or with my husband. But I have to say if you really want to clean your mind you really need to find your inner self and relax together with him, with her.
Giám khảo
Do you think listening to music is relaxing?
Thí sinh
If listening to some piano music or the meditation music it really can clear your mind but for some closet music or rock music it never helps
Giám khảo
What do you do to relax?
Thí sinh
Are we relaxed just to take a nap or sometimes just listen to music without thinking anything or play games to relax?
Where do you go to relax recently?
Điểm: 55.0Gợi ý: 「my bed」と直接答えられている点は良いですが、「the most clothed thing」は意味が通らないため、「the most comfortable place」や「the most relaxing place」にしましょう。また、「clean my mind」は通常「clear my mind」、「start everything from zero」は「start afresh」と言います。長く不自然な一文にせず、理由を2文程度で明確に説明してください。
Ví dụ: Definitely my bed. It’s the most comfortable place for me to relax because I can take a nap and clear my mind. After that, I feel refreshed and ready to start afresh.
Who do you usually relax with?
Điểm: 45.0Gợi ý: 質問は「誰とリラックスするか」なので、「I usually relax with...」と明確に答えましょう。「dress with」は「spend time with」または「relax with」、「clean your mind」は「clear your mind」が適切です。また、ペットや夫を指す「him, her」は不自然で、ここでは代名詞を使わず具体的に説明すると自然です。
Ví dụ: I usually relax with my husband or my pets. My husband and I often watch TV together, while my pets make me feel calm when I play with them. Spending time with them helps me clear my mind.
Do you think listening to music is relaxing?
Điểm: 65.0Gợi ý: ピアノ音楽や瞑想音楽について意見を述べ、ロック音楽との対比もできています。ただし、「If listening...」ではなく「Listening to...」または「I find...」で始めましょう。「the meditation music」は「meditation music」、「closet music」はおそらく「classical music」の誤りなので、意図に合う語を使ってください。対比には「However」や「whereas」を使うと、より明確になります。
Ví dụ: Yes, I find certain types of music very relaxing. Soft piano or meditation music helps me clear my mind, especially after a stressful day. However, I don’t find rock music relaxing because it is usually too loud and energetic.
What do you do to relax?
Điểm: 50.0Gợi ý: 複数の方法を挙げようとしていますが、疑問文の形になっており、質問への直接的な回答になっていません。「I usually...」で始め、動詞の形をそろえて説明しましょう。「listen to music without thinking about anything」や「play video games」など、自然な表現を使い、最後に効果を加えると内容が充実します。
Ví dụ: I usually take a short nap or listen to music without thinking about anything. Sometimes, I also play video games to take my mind off work. These activities help me relax and feel less stressed.
× Definitely my bed.
✓ I definitely go to my bed to relax.
The original answer is a sentence fragment because it does not contain a subject and a finite verb. Use a complete sentence such as I definitely go to my bed to relax.
× Do you know that sleeping on the bed or relaxing on the bed is the most clothed thing in the world...
✓ Do you know that sleeping in bed or relaxing in bed is the most relaxing thing in the world...
When referring to the general activity of sleeping, English normally uses in bed rather than on the bed. On the bed is used when emphasizing the physical surface.
× ...is the most clothed thing in the world...
✓ ...is the most relaxing thing in the world...
Clothed describes someone or something wearing clothes, so it does not express the intended meaning. Use relaxing to describe an activity that helps you rest.
× Maybe I only dress with my pets or with my husband.
✓ Maybe I usually relax with my pets or my husband.
The verb dress does not fit the intended meaning of the answer. The sentence needs the verb relax, which directly answers the question Who do you usually relax with? Also, usually is more natural than only here.
× ...relax together with him, with her.
✓ ...relax by yourself.
The pronouns him and her do not have clear antecedents and do not agree with the idea of finding your inner self. Use the reflexive expression by yourself when referring to relaxing alone.
× If listening to some piano music or the meditation music it really can clear your mind but for some closet music or rock music it never helps
✓ If you listen to piano music or meditation music, it can really clear your mind, but some other types of music or rock music never help.
The if-clause needs a clear subject and verb: If you listen. The original sentence also joins several ideas without clear punctuation or structure. Use a complete conditional clause followed by the result.
× ...piano music or the meditation music...
✓ ...piano music or meditation music...
Music is generally an uncountable noun when referring to a type of music in general, so it does not need the definite article the here. Use the meditation music only when referring to specific meditation music already mentioned.
× Are we relaxed just to take a nap or sometimes just listen to music without thinking anything or play games to relax?
✓ I relax by taking a nap, listening to music, or playing games.
The question asks what you do, so the answer should use the present simple: I relax. Are we relaxed is a passive or linking-verb structure and does not describe your regular activity.
× Are we relaxed just to take a nap or sometimes just listen to music without thinking anything or play games to relax?
✓ I relax by taking a nap, listening to music, or playing games.
After the preposition by, use the gerund form of the verb: taking, listening, and playing. Keeping the three activities in the same -ing form also creates a parallel structure.
× ...listen to music without thinking anything...
✓ ...listen to music without thinking about anything...
The verb think normally takes the preposition about when referring to a subject or matter. Therefore, say think about anything rather than think anything in this context.
× Are we relaxed just to take a nap or sometimes just listen to music without thinking anything or play games to relax?
✓ I relax by taking a nap, listening to music without thinking about anything, or playing games.
The original sentence is incorrectly formed as a question even though it is intended to be an answer. It also lacks a clear subject and uses an inconsistent list of activities. Use I relax followed by parallel activity phrases.