Part 1
Giám khảo
Did you have a bike when you were a child?
Thí sinh
When I was a youngster, my mom bought a new bicycle for me, like a present for my birthday party. I feel very happy and excited when I have that because in that year, this is the limited products. So I'm very proud of my bike and I.
Giám khảo
Do you think bikes are popular in your country?
Thí sinh
To be honest in my country they people keen on riding motorbike most but car is too expensive for their salary. But bike just students who study a primary ride the bike to school. I'm cannot see the bike anymore in the road.
Did you have a bike when you were a child?
Điểm: 58.0Gợi ý: Cải thiện: (1) Trả lời trực tiếp, rõ ràng bằng một câu chủ đề; (2) Sửa ngữ pháp và thì (nên dùng quá khứ đơn khi kể chuyện quá khứ); (3) Rút gọn và tránh thừa ý, dùng liên từ để nối mạch câu; (4) Thêm chi tiết cụ thể ngắn gọn (ví dụ: màu sắc, cách bạn dùng xe) để làm câu trả lời sinh động hơn. Ví dụ cụ thể: - Dùng “I was very happy” thay cho “I feel very happy” khi nói về quá khứ. - Thay “this is the limited products” bằng mô tả rõ ràng: “bicycles were rare in my town at that time.” - Giữ câu tối đa 4-5 câu, mỗi câu rõ ý.
Ví dụ: Yes. When I was a child my mother bought me a bright red bicycle for my tenth birthday. I was very excited because bicycles were rare in our town then, so I felt proud to ride it. I used it every afternoon to ride to my friend’s house and around the neighborhood. It was one of my favorite childhood memories.
Do you think bikes are popular in your country?
Điểm: 52.0Gợi ý: Cải thiện: (1) Bắt đầu bằng câu chủ đề rõ ràng trả lời trực tiếp; (2) Sử dụng cấu trúc ngữ pháp đúng (sử dụng danh từ số nhiều/số ít, trật tự từ) và thì phù hợp; (3) Dùng liên từ để làm rõ so sánh và nguyên nhân (e.g., “because”, “however”); (4) Thêm số liệu hoặc ví dụ cụ thể nếu có (ví dụ: who uses motorbikes, which age groups use bicycles).
Ví dụ: Not really. Most people in my country prefer motorbikes because they are affordable and convenient for city traffic. Cars are too expensive for many families, so only wealthier people own them. Bicycles are now mainly used by young children who ride to primary school, so you rarely see adults cycling on the roads.
× When I was a youngster, my mom bought a new bicycle for me, like a present for my birthday party.
✓ When I was a youngster, my mom bought a new bicycle for me as a present for my birthday.
The sentence is mostly correct but 'like a present for my birthday party' is awkward and informal. Use past tense consistently (bought) and replace 'like' with 'as' to indicate role. Also 'birthday party' can be shortened to 'birthday' for natural phrasing.
× I feel very happy and excited when I have that because in that year, this is the limited products.
✓ I felt very happy and excited when I had it because that year such products were limited.
The context is past (childhood), so verbs should be past tense: 'felt' and 'had'. 'That' referring to the bike should be 'it'. 'This is the limited products' is ungrammatical: use 'such products were limited' to express scarcity in that year.
× So I'm very proud of my bike and I.
✓ So I was very proud of my bike.
The original ends with an incomplete phrase 'and I.' Remove the fragment and use past tense 'was' to match the context. Keep the sentence concise.
× To be honest in my country they people keen on riding motorbike most but car is too expensive for their salary.
✓ To be honest, in my country people are keen on riding motorbikes, but cars are too expensive for their salaries.
Pronoun and determiner issues: remove 'they' before 'people'. Use plural nouns 'motorbikes' and 'cars' and plural verbs 'are'. 'Salary' should be plural 'salaries' when referring generally. Add commas for clarity.
× But bike just students who study a primary ride the bike to school.
✓ But only primary school students ride bikes to school.
Word order and adjective use: 'only' should modify 'primary school students'. Use the compound noun 'primary school students' and plural 'bikes'. Remove redundancy 'ride the bike'.
× I'm cannot see the bike anymore in the road.
✓ I cannot see bikes on the road anymore.
'I'm cannot' is incorrect; use 'I cannot' or 'I can't'. Use plural 'bikes' for general statement and 'on the road' is the correct prepositional phrase. Place 'anymore' at the end for natural order.