Part 1
Giám khảo
Did you have any opportunities to take part in new activities as a child?
Thí sinh
Yes my mum wanted me to develop in many respects. So when I was in primary school she sent me to a basketball class. I don't know basketball and I was very small at that time. I tried I tried my best but I can't throw the ball into the basket. That's so bad.
Giám khảo
Should people try as many different things as they can?
Thí sinh
Yes, to make the most of our life, we need to try as much things as possible if we have opportunity and time so that we can have many new ways to entertain ourselves and see a bigger world so that make our short life more interesting.
Did you have any opportunities to take part in new activities as a child?
Điểm: 68.0Gợi ý: 回答基本切题,也提供了具体经历,但存在明显的时态、搭配和重复问题。将“I don't know basketball”改为“I didn’t know how to play basketball”,因为你是在描述童年经历;将“I can't throw”改为“I couldn’t throw”。避免重复“I tried”,并用“However”连接转折。最后不要用“That’s so bad”评价自己,可以说明这次经历带来的结果或感受,使结尾更自然。
Ví dụ: Yes, I did. When I was in primary school, my mum encouraged me to develop different skills, so she enrolled me in a basketball class. I was quite small and didn’t know how to play, so I struggled to get the ball into the basket. However, I tried my best and gradually became more confident.
Should people try as many different things as they can?
Điểm: 64.0Gợi ý: 观点明确,但句子过长,且有多处语法问题。使用“as many things as possible”,而不是“as much things as possible”;“if we have the opportunity and time”需要冠词;“so that make”应改为“so that they can make”。建议拆成两到三句,并用“First of all”和“Besides”组织理由。还可以加入一个具体例子,例如学习运动或尝试新爱好,让内容更有说服力。
Ví dụ: Yes, I think people should try a variety of activities whenever they have the time and opportunity. First of all, new experiences can help us discover our interests and develop useful skills. Besides, they allow us to meet different people and see the world from a broader perspective, which makes life more meaningful.
× I don't know basketball and I was very small at that time.
✓ I didn't know how to play basketball, and I was very small at that time.
句子描述的是童年时期的经历,因此应该使用过去时。这里将 “don't know” 改为 “didn't know”。另外,“know basketball”表达不自然;表示“不会打篮球”时,应使用 “know how to play basketball”。
× I can't throw the ball into the basket.
✓ I couldn't throw the ball into the basket.
这句话描述的是过去在篮球课上的能力,所以情态动词 “can” 的过去式应为 “could”,否定形式为 “couldn't”。
× To make the most of our life, we need to try as much things as possible.
✓ To make the most of our lives, we need to try as much things as possible.
主语是 “we”,表示每个人的生活时通常使用复数 “lives”,因此 “our life” 应改为 “our lives”。
× We need to try as much things as possible.
✓ We need to try as many things as possible.
“Things” 是可数名词复数,因此要使用修饰可数名词的数量词 “many”,不能使用修饰不可数名词的 “much”。正确结构是 “as many things as possible”。
× If we have opportunity and time,
✓ If we have an opportunity and time,
“Opportunity” 是可数名词单数,前面需要冠词。这里是泛指一次机会,因此使用不定冠词 “an”。
× So that we can have many new ways to entertain ourselves and see a bigger world so that make our short life more interesting.
✓ So that we can have many new ways to entertain ourselves and see a bigger world, making our short life more interesting.
第二个 “so that” 后面的 “make” 缺少主语,句子结构不完整。可以改为现在分词短语 “making our short life more interesting”,表示前面行为带来的结果。
× So that make our short life more interesting.
✓ So that make our short lives more interesting.
“Our” 后面表示每个人各自的生活时,应使用复数名词 “lives”,因此 “our life” 应改为 “our lives”。