Part 1
Giám khảo
Did you like going to parks as a child?
Thí sinh
Yes, I like going to barks, sometimes with my family, sometimes with my friends, but I I prefer going going to the park with my friends because I enjoy playing with him.
Giám khảo
Do you still like going to parks now?
Thí sinh
Yes, I still enjoy going to the bank, but it is not like when I was young. Now I am going only to sitting and doing barbecue and, umm, speaking with the family or friends and, uh, taking some tea or making.
Giám khảo
Would you like to see more parks in your city?
Thí sinh
Yes, because there are a safe playing areas for children. Also there are a place for older peoples to be relaxed. So it uh, it has a negative, uh, advantage effect in the society.
Giám khảo
Are there any parks you want to go to in the future?
Thí sinh
Yes, sure, I want to visit more barks, not only here in our city. I want to visit the other cities and other countries to visit their parks and take a new experience.
Did you like going to parks as a child?
Điểm: 58.0Gợi ý: حاول أن تكون إجابتك أكثر صحة نحويًا ودقة في المفردات، وقلل التكرار. ابدأ بجملة موضوعية واضحة ثم أضف تفاصيل داعمة محددة باستخدام روابط بسيطة (like, because, and). مثلاً صحّح الأخطاء في نطق الكلمات (park not bark) واستخدم ضمائر متناسقة (them not him). لا تتجاوز خمس جمل.
Ví dụ: Yes, I liked going to parks as a child because they were fun places to play. I often went with my family for picnics, but I preferred going with my friends because we played games together. For example, we would play football and climb trees, which was very exciting.
Do you still like going to parks now?
Điểm: 55.0Gợi ý: عدل الأخطاء اللفظية واستخدم جمل أوضح ومتكاملة. تجنب الكلمات المكررة والتردد (umm, uh) واصحح المفردات (park not bank). ابدأ بجملة مُركّزة ثم أضف مثالين محددين عن أنشطتك الحالية في الحديقة، مستعملًا وصلات مثل but, now, for example.
Ví dụ: Yes, I still enjoy going to parks, but my visits are different now. These days I usually go to relax and have barbecues with family or friends. For example, we sit, chat, and drink tea while the children play nearby.
Would you like to see more parks in your city?
Điểm: 50.0Gợi ý: حاول أن تكون الجمل منطقية وخالية من التناقضات: لا تكن تستخدم عبارات متضاربة مثل "negative advantage". صغ رأيًا واضحًا وادعمُه بأسباب محددة ومترابطة باستخدام روابط مثل because, also, therefore. صحّح الأخطاء النحوية (there are safe playing areas -> there would be safe play areas; older peoples -> older people).
Ví dụ: Yes, I would like more parks in my city because they provide safe play areas for children. Also, parks offer peaceful spots for older people to relax. Therefore, more parks would improve community health and social life.
Are there any parks you want to go to in the future?
Điểm: 60.0Gợi ý: اضبط المفردات والنحو: استخدم 'parks' بدل 'barks' و'gain new experiences' بدل 'take a new experience'. ابدأ بجملة مباشرة ثم أعطِ مثالاً محدداً عن نوع الحدائق أو الدولة التي تود زيارتها واستخدم وصلات مثل not only... but also وfor example.
Ví dụ: Yes, I would like to visit more parks in the future, not only in my city but also in other places. For example, I want to see famous botanical gardens and national parks in other countries to learn about different plants and cultures.
× Yes, I like going to barks, sometimes with my family, sometimes with my friends, but I I prefer going going to the park with my friends because I enjoy playing with him.
✓ Yes, I liked going to parks, sometimes with my family, sometimes with my friends, but I prefer going to the park with my friends because I enjoy playing with them.
الأخطاء الرئيسية هنا هي أخطاء في الزمن، الجمع، الضمائر وتهجئة الكلمات. يجب استخدام الماضي 'liked' لأن السؤال يسأل عن الطفولة (Did you like...), استخدم الجمع 'parks' أو مفرد 'the park' بحسب السياق؛ في الجملة الأصلية الكلمة 'barks' هي تهجئة خاطئة لـ 'parks'. تم تكرار كلمات 'I' و'going' عن طريق الخطأ. استخدم ضمير 'them' للإشارة إلى 'my friends' بدل 'him'. اقتراحات للتحسين: 1) لاحظ زمن السؤال (Did you...) واستخدم الماضي عند الإجابة عن عادات سابقة. 2) تحقق من تهجئة الكلمات الأساسية مثل 'parks'. 3) تأكد من تطابق الضمائر مع المرجع (plural -> them). 4) تجنب التكرار العرضي للكلمات.
× Yes, I still enjoy going to the bank, but it is not like when I was young. Now I am going only to sitting and doing barbecue and, umm, speaking with the family or friends and, uh, taking some tea or making.
✓ Yes, I still enjoy going to the park, but it is not like when I was young. Now I only go to sit and have a barbecue and talk with family or friends and have some tea.
الجملة الأصلية تحتوي على أخطاء في اختيار الكلمات وزمن الفعل وترتيب الكلمات. 'bank' و 'bark' هنا هي تهجئات خاطئة ويجب أن تكون 'park'. التعبير الصحيح للفعل الروتيني هو 'I only go to sit' أو ببساطة 'I only go to sit and have a barbecue' بدل 'I am going only to sitting'. استخدم 'talk' بدلاً من 'speaking' في هذا السياق لتكون أكثر طبيعية. استخدم 'have some tea' بدلاً من 'taking some tea or making'. اقتراحات للتحسين: 1) استخدم الزمن الحاضر البسيط للأفعال الروتينية (I go, I have). 2) تجنب بناءات غير صحيحة مثل 'going to sitting'. 3) تحقق من كلمات مثل 'park' بدلاً من 'bank'. 4) رتب الأنشطة بشكل طبيعي: 'sit and have a barbecue, talk with family, have some tea'.
× Yes, because there are a safe playing areas for children. Also there are a place for older peoples to be relaxed. So it uh, it has a negative, uh, advantage effect in the society.
✓ Yes, because there are safe playing areas for children. Also, there are places for older people to relax. So, it has a positive effect on society.
الأخطاء هنا تشمل استخدام غير صحيح للأدوات (articles)، الجمع والتهجئة والاختيار اللفظي. يجب إزالة 'a' قبل 'safe playing areas' لأن العبارة جمع. 'a place' يجب أن يصبح 'places' ليطابق الفكرة العامة، و'older peoples' خطأ لأنه يجب أن يكون 'older people'. 'to be relaxed' غير طبيعي؛ الأفضل 'to relax'. الجملة الأخيرة تحتوي على تناقض 'negative advantage effect' وعبارة 'in the society' غير طبيعية؛ الأفضل 'positive effect on society' أو 'a negative effect on society' حسب المقصود. افترضت أن المقصود إيجابي لذلك صححت إلى 'positive effect on society'. اقتراحات للتحسين: 1) تأكد من توافق المقالات مع الأسماء المفردة أو الجمع. 2) استخدم 'people' بدون -s للجمع. 3) استخدم تعابير طبيعية مثل 'places to relax' و 'effect on society'.
× Yes, sure, I want to visit more barks, not only here in our city. I want to visit the other cities and other countries to visit their parks and take a new experience.
✓ Yes, sure, I want to visit more parks, not only here in our city. I want to visit other cities and countries to see their parks and gain new experiences.
الأخطاء تشمل تهجئة 'barks' بدل 'parks' وتوافق الجمع والتعبير الطبيعي باللغة الإنجليزية. 'the other cities and other countries' يمكن تبسيطها إلى 'other cities and countries'. 'to visit their parks and take a new experience' غير طبيعي؛ الأفضل 'see their parks and gain new experiences' أو 'have new experiences'. اقتراحات للتحسين: 1) تحقق من تهجئة الكلمات الأساسية. 2) استخدم تركيبًا أكثر طبيعية مثل 'see their parks' و 'gain new experiences'. 3) اجعل الجمع والتعابير العامة بدون 'the' عندما تتحدث بشكل عام عن مدن وبلدان أخرى.