Part 1
Examinador
Did you have a bike when you were a child?
Candidato
Yes, I have the red one when I was a kid that was bought by my parents, which was good. Uh, that was my favorite one as far as I remember.
Examinador
Do you think bikes are popular in your country?
Candidato
Yes, I think so many people use bike their bikes when they are commute or go to the school because it is not no need to have a license and and it also don't need to use any energy.
Did you have a bike when you were a child?
Pontuação: 62.0Sugestão: 回答は意味が伝わりますが、文法ミス(時制、冠詞、過去形の一致)と冗長な表現が目立ちます。また、トピック文の後にもう一つか二つの具体的な詳細を短く付け加えるとより良くなります。改善ポイント: 1) 過去の出来事には過去形を使う(例:I had, it was) 2) 冠詞を正しく使う(a/an/the) 3) 簡潔に話し、余分なフィラー(uh)を減らす 4) 1〜2文で具体的な詳細(どんな色/どんな特徴/どこで乗ったか)を加える 例文で練習して、文法と流暢さを同時に向上させてください。
Exemplo: Yes, I had a red bike when I was a child. My parents bought it for me, and I used to ride it to the park every weekend. It was my favorite because it was small and easy to handle.
Do you think bikes are popular in your country?
Pontuação: 54.0Sugestão: 回答内容は理解できますが、文法(主語と動詞の一致、否定の二重表現)、語順、冗長さや不自然な表現が多いです。より自然で論理的にするには: 1) 文を整理して主語と動詞を一致させる(people use bikes, they commute) 2) 二重否定を避ける(it does not require a license) 3) 「エネルギーを使わない」は不正確なので“it’s eco-friendly or cheap to maintain”など具体的表現を使う 4) リンクワード(for example, because, so)を入れて理由を明確にする 理由を2点程度に絞って簡潔に述べる練習をしてください。
Exemplo: Yes, I think bicycles are quite popular in my country. Many people use bikes to commute or go to school because they don't need a driving license and they are inexpensive to maintain. For example, students often ride bikes to campus to save money and avoid traffic.
× Yes, I have the red one when I was a kid that was bought by my parents, which was good.
✓ Yes, I had a red one when I was a kid; it was bought by my parents and it was my favorite.
「have the red one when I was a kid」には時制の不一致があるため過去形hadを使う必要があります。さらに『that was bought by my parents』は過去分詞を使った受動表現ですが、文を自然にするために分割し明確な述語を用いました。改善の提案: 1) 子供の頃の出来事は過去形で表現する。2) 受動態は文をつなげるために簡潔にする。3) 不要な関係代名詞whichは削除し、文を短く明確にする。
× Yes, I think so many people use bike their bikes when they are commute or go to the school because it is not no need to have a license and and it also don't need to use any energy.
✓ Yes, I think many people use bikes when they commute or go to school because you do not need a license and they do not use any fuel.
この文には複数の時制・品詞・構造の誤りがあります。主な問題点と修正: 1) 'so many people'は語順がおかしいので'many people'にする(限定詞の順序)。2) 'use bike their bikes'は語順と重複の誤りなので 'use bikes' に修正。3) 'are commute'は進行形の誤用で、一般的な習慣は現在形を使うため 'commute' に。4) 'go to the school'では冠詞不要なので 'go to school' に。5) 'it is not no need to have a license'は二重否定で不自然、代わりに 'you do not need a license' や 'no license is needed' を使う。6) 'and and it also don't need to use any energy'は主語一致と語彙選択の誤りで 'they do not use any fuel' または 'they do not require fuel' に修正。改善の提案: 1) 習慣や一般事実には現在形の一般動詞を使う。2) 冠詞の有無を確認する。3) 二重否定を避ける。4) 主語に合う動詞の形を使う(単複数一致)。