Bike— Part 1 Relatório

Sugestão: Be more concise and grammatical: start with a clear topic sentence, then give one or two specific supporting details using linking words. Avoid repetition and irrelevant phrases.

Exemplo: Yes, I did. My grandfather first taught me to ride in a nearby yard when I was about six, and later my father practiced with me on quiet streets. Because of their help, I became confident riding on my own.

Sugestão: Reduce hesitations and organize your answer: give a clear opinion, then two specific supporting reasons with linking words and examples. Use precise vocabulary (infrastructure, bike lanes) and finish with a brief conclusion.

Exemplo: Yes, bikes are very popular in Israel today. In the last few years the government has built many bike lanes and paths in cities and nature areas, so more people cycle for commuting and leisure. For example, Tel Aviv now has an extensive network of lanes that make cycling safer and easier.

× I did have bikes on my childhood.

✓ I did have a bike in my childhood.

The noun 'childhood' is a singular time period and should be used with the preposition 'in'. Also 'bikes' vs 'bike': context implies possession of a single bike (more natural), so change to singular. Use 'in my childhood' rather than 'on my childhood'.

× It was my grandfather that took me when I was young to a nearby yard that we can practice.

✓ It was my grandfather who took me when I was young to a nearby yard where we could practice.

Use 'who' with people instead of 'that'. The clause describing the yard should use 'where' rather than 'that' when referring to a place. Also maintain past-tense modal 'could' to match 'took' and 'was'.

× And yeah, also my father took me to the right and to practice also.

✓ And my father also took me to the right place to practice.

The phrase 'to the right' is incomplete; 'right place' is the intended meaning. Place the adverb 'also' near the verb for natural word order. Remove redundant 'also' at end.

× I want to share that when I had.

✓ I want to share that memory of when I had a bike.

The original sentence is incomplete and lacks an object after 'had'. Completing the thought with 'a bike' or 'that memory' corrects the sentence structure.

× In Israel on uh, nowadays, uh, the bikes are very popular and actually uh, they're uh, in the last few years, the country build a lot of uh, roads, uh, in the nature and also inside the, the city that people can, uh, ride their bikes also in like, for example, for the, in Tel Aviv uh, the.

✓ In Israel nowadays, bikes are very popular. In the last few years the country has built a lot of bike paths in natural areas and inside the city so that people can ride their bikes, for example in Tel Aviv.

Remove filler words and use 'nowadays' without 'on'. Use present perfect 'has built' to describe recent changes continuing to present. Use 'bike paths' or 'roads' and 'in natural areas' instead of 'in the nature'. 'So that' introduces purpose clause. Clean up redundant phrases for clarity.