Study— Part 1 Relatório

Sugestão: Be more concise and natural: give a clear topic sentence stating your status, then one brief detail about your degree and university. Avoid repeating words and correct prepositions (e.g., 'in Hospitality Management' or 'with a degree in Hospitality Management at Bulacan State University').

Exemplo: I'm a recent college graduate with a degree in Hospitality Management from Bulacan State University. I finished my studies this year and I’m currently looking for entry-level roles in the hospitality industry.

Sugestão: Use correct institution names and past tense consistently, remove repetition, and link ideas with a short connector. Be specific about locations and avoid errors in names. Improve fluency by using one or two clear sentences.

Exemplo: I studied Hospitality Management at Bulacan State University’s main campus. Before that, I attended Marcelo Pilar National High School; both schools are in Palolas, Bulacan.

Sugestão: Start with a direct opinion, then give a specific reason and an example. Use linking words like 'because' or 'for example' and avoid vague phrases such as 'things that we need to learn.'

Exemplo: Yes, I think it’s a very good place to study because the courses are practical and focus on real industry skills. For example, we had hands-on training in hotel operations that I can apply in future jobs.

Sugestão: Clarify your opinion and correct language errors. If you do want changes, give one concrete suggestion; if not, explain why briefly. Avoid fragmented or unclear phrases.

Exemplo: I wouldn’t ask for major changes because the program taught me the key skills I need. However, I would add more internship placements to give students additional real-world experience.

Sugestão: Answer directly with a clear plan and reasons. Use complete sentences and linking words like 'because' to explain why. Be specific about your next steps (e.g., taking a course, pursuing a diploma, or attending workshops).

Exemplo: Even though I’ve graduated, I plan to take short courses in event management to strengthen my skills because having structured training will make my job search easier and better prepare me for industry roles.

× I'm a fresh college graduate. I graduated as Hospitality Management in Bulacan State University main campus.

✓ I'm a recent college graduate. I graduated in Hospitality Management from Bulacan State University Main Campus.

The original has awkward word choice and preposition errors. 'Fresh' is not commonly used for graduates; 'recent' is appropriate. 'Graduated as Hospitality Management' is incorrect: use 'graduated in Hospitality Management' to indicate the field of study. Add the preposition 'from' before the university and capitalize 'Main Campus' as a proper noun. Improve word order for natural English.

× Where do you study?

✓ Where did you study?

The student is a graduate, so the action occurred in the past. The original uses present tense; change to past tense with 'did' to match context. Use past tense when referring to completed education.

× I studied my College in Balakan State University while I I studied my high school in Marcelo Pilar National High School. Both are located in Palolas, Bulacan.

✓ I studied college at Bulacan State University, and I attended Marcelo Pilar National High School for high school. Both are located in Palolas, Bulacan.

Errors include incorrect university name spelling ('Balakan' -> 'Bulacan'), redundant 'I I', awkward phrasing 'studied my College'. Use 'studied college at' or 'attended' for institutions. Separate the two clauses with 'and' for clarity.

× Based on my experience, that university is a good place to study because they can teach us the things that we need to learn and I think we can use it in the future.

✓ Based on my experience, that university is a good place to study because they teach us the things we need to learn, and I think we can use them in the future.

Pronoun agreement and tense: 'they can teach us' is okay but 'can' is unnecessary; simple present 'teach' is preferable for habitual truth. 'The things that we need to learn' is fine, but 'use it' incorrectly refers to 'things' (plural) with 'it' (singular). Change to 'use them'. Also combine clauses more smoothly.

× If I were given a chance to make any changes where I studied, I think I would say no because they teach me enough to 5 seconds. Use it.

✓ If I were given a chance to make any changes to the place where I studied, I would say no because they taught me enough to use in the future.

Multiple issues: preposition and word order ('changes to the place where I studied'), tense consistency with conditional 'If I were... I would...' is correct but the explanation should use past tense 'taught' (referring to completed teaching) or present perfect; 'they teach me enough' is ungrammatical for a past experience. The phrase 'to 5 seconds. Use it.' is nonsensical; replace with 'to use in the future' to convey meaning. Remove extraneous fragments.

× What are your future study plans?

✓ What are your future study plans?

This question is fine as written; no correction needed. It correctly asks about future plans using present progressive/perfect sense for planned future actions.

× Though I already graduated, study plans can still be helpful because having a plan can. Make my task and jobs easier than doing it immediately and without plans.

✓ Although I have already graduated, study plans can still be helpful because having a plan can make my tasks and jobs easier than doing them immediately without planning.

Run-on sentence and punctuation errors: 'can.' is an incomplete clause. Use 'Although I have already graduated' (present perfect) to link past action to the present. 'Make my task and jobs easier' needs subject-verb order: 'can make my tasks and jobs easier'. Use plural 'tasks' and 'them' to refer back. Replace 'without plans' with 'without planning' for natural phrasing.