Study— Part 1 Relatório

Sugestão: 質問に直接答えた後で、文法と語順の誤りを直し、情報を簡潔にまとめると良いです。例えば冠詞の使い方（a/an/the）、現在進行形や在籍表現（I am a student/ I study at ...）の修正、数字の表現（I'm a third-year studentやI'm 30 years oldなど）を明確に区別することを意識してください。また文は3〜4文以内に収め、冗長な繰り返しを避けましょう。

Exemplo: I'm a student. I study economics at Jose University, and I'm currently a third-year student.

Sugestão: 場所の表現と形容詞の使い方を自然にする必要があります。'hot geology campus' は意味が不明確なので正しい名称や適切な形容詞を使い、場所の位置関係や理由を簡潔に説明してください。またフィラー（uh, um）を減らし、接続詞で文をつなげて流れを良くしましょう。

Exemplo: I study on the Hot Geology campus, which is a bit far from central Tokyo. However, it’s comfortable and convenient for students.

Sugestão: 肯定の理由を述べるときは、冗長な言葉を減らして具体例を加えると説得力が増します。'around my campus' の単数形・複数形を正しくし、なぜ静かで学習に適しているのか（図書館や自習スペースなど）を一文で付け加えてください。

Exemplo: Yes. The campus is very quiet, with good libraries and study rooms, so I can concentrate on my work.

Sugestão: 要望を数で示すのは良いですが、『Only three』の後に具体的な三つを列挙する必要があります。語彙（charging port, power outlets, laptops）を正しく使い、文法的に簡潔な提案を3点挙げる形にしましょう。また疑問形は不要なので平叙文で理由を述べてください。

Exemplo: There are three improvements I'd like. First, the university should install power outlets on every table for charging laptops. Second, it could provide more quiet study rooms. Third, improving Wi-Fi speed would help with online research.

Sugestão: 将来の計画は明確ですが、繰り返しや口語的表現を減らし、具体的な職種や理由を述べると良いです。'work in the bank' は 'work at a bank' または 'work in banking' を使い、'set a more in financial ways' は意味が不明瞭なので具体的な目標（e.g. become a financial analyst）に言い換えてください。

Exemplo: I'm studying economics now, and after graduation I'd like to work in banking, ideally as a financial analyst to gain experience in investment and risk management.

× I'm student and I'm going to Jose University and my major is economics and I'm 30 years grade student.

✓ I'm a student and I'm going to Jose University and my major is economics and I'm a 3rd-year student.

The sentence misses the indefinite article 'a' before 'student' and uses an unidiomatic phrase '30 years grade student'. Use 'a' for singular countable nouns. '30 years grade student' is incorrect; likely intended 'third-year student' or '3rd-year student'. Use numerals with hyphen for compound adjectives before nouns. Also ensure parallel and natural phrasing by keeping 'my major is economics' and 'I'm a 3rd-year student'. Note: Use 'a' before singular professions or roles and use 'third-year' for year of study.

× I'm studying in hot geology campus.

✓ I'm studying at the Hot Geology campus.

Use 'at' for locations such as campuses or institutions. Capitalize proper names like 'Hot Geology' if it is a specific campus name. Also include the article 'the' before 'Hot Geology campus' because it refers to a specific campus. If 'hot' is descriptive, it should be lowercase and phrasing may need revision; here treating it as a proper name.

× It is, uh, kind of far from the center of Tokyo, but yeah, it is comfortable, it's convenient.

✓ It is kind of far from the center of Tokyo, but it is comfortable and convenient.

Avoid repeating pronouns unnecessarily and remove filler hesitations. Use 'it is' consistently and connect adjectives with 'and' for smoother, grammatical coordination. This removes redundancy and improves fluency.

× Yes, it is because, uh, around my campuses it, it is very quiet and uh, so then I can focus my studying.

✓ Yes, it is because the area around my campus is very quiet, so I can focus on my studies.

Use singular 'campus' if referring to the one you attend; 'campuses' implies multiple. 'Around my campus' is the correct prepositional phrase. 'Focus my studying' is unidiomatic; use 'focus on my studies'. Remove filler words and duplicate pronouns.

× Only three. The university should add a port charger, charging electronic port in a every table in today's education scenes.

✓ Just three. The university should add a charging port at every table in today's educational settings.

'Only three' is better as 'Just three' in spoken response. 'A port charger' and 'charging electronic port' are awkward; use 'charging port'. 'In a every table' is incorrect: use 'at every table' or 'on every table'. 'Education scenes' is unnatural; use 'educational settings' or 'today's classrooms'.

× Uh, they're using a laptop is, umm, getting more important?

✓ Using laptops is becoming more important.

The original mixes structures and ends with a question mark incorrectly. For a statement, use the gerund 'using' as subject: 'Using laptops is becoming more important.' Use plural 'laptops' when speaking generally. 'Becoming' is the correct present progressive sense for change.

× So I am studying uh, economics right now. So after graduating uh, I want to work in the bank. So yes, I wanna set a more in uh, financial ways.

✓ I am studying economics right now. After graduating, I want to work at a bank. I want to pursue a career in finance.

'Work in the bank' is usually 'work at a bank' or 'work in banking.' 'Wanna set a more in financial ways' is ungrammatical and unclear. Replace with 'pursue a career in finance' for a natural, grammatical expression. Remove unnecessary filler 'so' and 'uh' and ensure correct preposition use and idiomatic phrases.