Opportunities— Part 1 Relatório

Sugestão: Answer the question more directly at the beginning instead of using the slightly unnatural phrase “To be very specific.” Use “co-curricular” with a hyphen, and avoid repeating similar ideas such as “speaking skills,” “fluent,” and “expressing my ideas.” Your answer is well organized and includes specific examples and a clear result, but it could sound more natural with smoother phrasing.

Exemplo: Yes, I had several opportunities to try new activities as a child. I regularly took part in co-curricular activities, especially debate and public speaking competitions. These experiences helped me become more confident and fluent when expressing my ideas.

Sugestão: Give a clear answer first and then explain why with one or two specific benefits. Avoid the incorrect and unclear phrase “everyone should test it”; say “people should try new experiences” instead. Also correct “in their life” to “in their lives,” remove the repeated “it,” and avoid ending with the informal filler “So yeah.” Use linking words such as “because,” “for example,” and “as a result” to make your ideas more coherent.

Exemplo: Yes, I think people should try a variety of activities because it helps them discover their interests and develop new skills. For example, someone might try hiking, cooking, or joining a drama club. Even if they do not enjoy every activity, they can learn something valuable from each experience.

× Yes, I believe people should try different things in their life and because I found it very adventurous.

✓ Yes, I believe people should try different things in their lives because I find them very adventurous.

The plural noun people requires the plural possessive noun lives rather than the singular form life. Use lives because the sentence refers to the lives of many people.

× Yes, I believe people should try different things in their life and because I found it very adventurous.

✓ Yes, I believe people should try different things in their lives because I find them very adventurous.

The sentence expresses a general opinion, so use the present tense find instead of the past tense found. Use the present tense for opinions or situations that are generally true now.

× Yes, I believe people should try different things in their life and because I found it very adventurous.

✓ Yes, I believe people should try different things in their lives because I find them very adventurous.

The pronoun it is singular, but it refers to different things, which is plural. Use them to refer correctly to the plural noun things.

× Yes, I believe people should try different things in their life and because I found it very adventurous.

✓ Yes, I believe people should try different things in their lives because I find them very adventurous.

The combination and because incorrectly joins the ideas. Because alone is sufficient to introduce the reason. Avoid using two conjunctions when one clearly expresses the relationship between the ideas.

× Everyone should experience new things, especially in indoor or outdoor activities and it it will help them a lot.

✓ Everyone should experience new things, especially through indoor or outdoor activities, and this will help them a lot.

The pronoun it is repeated, creating an incorrect pronoun structure. Replace the repeated pronoun with this to refer clearly to the whole previous idea.

× Everyone should experience new things, especially in indoor or outdoor activities and it it will help them a lot.

✓ Everyone should experience new things, especially through indoor or outdoor activities, and this will help them a lot.

The original sentence contains a repeated pronoun and an unclear connection between the two ideas. The corrected sentence separates the main recommendation from its result more clearly. Use through to show that activities are the means of experiencing new things.