Opportunities— Part 1 Relatório

Sugestão: Your answer is generally good: it directly responds and gives specific examples. To improve, make sentences shorter and clearer (max 4–5 sentences), add a clear topic sentence, and use linking words to connect ideas. Also correct small grammar issues (e.g., use past tense consistently: “I participated in music and swimming classes” and “It helped me build my confidence”).

Exemplo: Yes. My parents encouraged me to try new activities, so I took music and swimming classes when I was a child. As a result, I became more confident because performing and competing pushed me out of my comfort zone. For instance, learning piano helped me speak up during school performances.

Sugestão: Good idea and personal example. To raise your score, state your main opinion in one clear sentence, then use linking words (for example, moreover, as a result) and keep tense consistency (“I found” not “I find”). Add one specific reason or brief outcome to support your view. Keep it within 3–4 sentences.

Exemplo: Yes, I believe people should try many different things because it helps uncover hidden talents and broadens experience. For example, when I started learning piano I found I was naturally good at music, which gave me confidence and a new hobby. As a result, I became more open to trying other creative activities.

× Yes, when I was a child I had many opportunities to take part in various activities because my parents encouraged me to try new things, for example, I participated for both music and swimming classes.

✓ Yes, when I was a child I had many opportunities to take part in various activities because my parents encouraged me to try new things; for example, I participated in both music and swimming classes.

Incorrect preposition use with the verb participate and punctuation. The phrase 'participated for both music and swimming classes' should use the preposition in: 'participated in both music and swimming classes.' Also the original is a comma splice joining two independent clauses; replace the comma with a semicolon or split into two sentences to correct sentence structure. Suggestion: use 'participated in' and separate clauses with a semicolon or period.

× It helped me build confidence

✓ It helped me build confidence.

Missing final punctuation only; grammatically the tense 'helped' correctly matches the past context. Add the period to complete the sentence. Suggestion: always include appropriate sentence-ending punctuation.

× Yes, I think people should try as many activities as they can because it will help them find and discover their hidden talents and possibilities.

✓ Yes, I think people should try as many activities as they can because it will help them find their hidden talents and abilities.

Word choice and redundancy issue rather than strict tense. 'Find and discover' is repetitive; use one verb. 'Possibilities' is awkward here; 'abilities' or 'skills' is more natural. This fits the sentence context and maintains future implication 'will help.' Suggestion: avoid redundant expressions and choose precise nouns like 'abilities'.

× For example, when I started learning the piano, I find that I am quite good at music.

✓ For example, when I started learning the piano, I found that I was quite good at music.

Tense inconsistency: the subordinate clause 'when I started learning the piano' is past, so the following observation should also be in the past ('found' and 'was') to maintain sequence of tenses. Change 'find' to 'found' and 'am' to 'was.' Suggestion: keep tense consistent in related clauses; use past tense for past events.