Tiredness— Part 1 Relatório

Sugestão: Be concise and grammatical. Start with a clear topic sentence that directly answers the question, avoid repetition, correct grammar (e.g., subject-verb agreement), and add a brief specific reason. Use one or two linking words if needed.

Exemplo: Yes, I often feel tired when I go outside because I suffer from congestion. For example, walking in busy streets makes my breathing difficult, which leaves me feeling exhausted quickly.

Sugestão: Make a direct, grammatically correct statement and give specific details. Use a linking word to connect the reason and an example. Avoid filler words like “umm” and finish your sentence clearly.

Exemplo: I usually feel tired when I am in crowded or polluted places because poor air quality and noise drain my energy. For instance, after commuting on a packed bus I often feel weak and need to rest.

Sugestão: Answer directly with a topic sentence, use correct verb forms, remove hesitations, and provide a brief reason or result. Keep to a maximum of 3–4 short sentences and use a linking word to show result.

Exemplo: When I feel tired, I usually stay at home and lie down in bed while listening to calming music. This helps me relax and recharge, so I feel refreshed and ready to continue my day.

× Yeah, I feel so tired whenever I whenever I go outside and it's make me feel so much congested wherever I go outside.

✓ Yeah, I feel so tired whenever I go outside, and it makes me feel very congested wherever I go.

Errors: repeated phrase 'whenever I' (sentence structure) and verb form 'make' should be 'makes' to agree with singular subject 'it' (subject-verb agreement) which falls under present tense issue and subject-verb agreement. Also 'so much congested' is unnatural; use 'very congested'. Suggestion: remove the duplicate phrase, use 'it makes' for third-person singular present, and replace 'so much congested' with 'very congested'.

× I feel tired whenever I umm being in crowded or polluted place which make me feel drained and.

✓ I feel tired whenever I am in crowded or polluted places, which makes me feel drained.

Errors: 'being' is incorrect here; you need the present simple 'am' for a state (present tense issue). 'Place' should be plural 'places' to match general meaning (singular/plural). 'Make' should be 'makes' to agree with singular relative pronoun 'which' referring to the situation, and the sentence fragment ending with 'and.' should be completed or removed (sentence structure). Suggestion: use 'I am in' for location, pluralize 'places' for generality, change 'make' to 'makes', and remove the unfinished 'and'.

× Whenever I feel tired, probably I like to, uh, rest in my house, laying in bed and listening to music, which makes my which makes me feel refreshing.

✓ Whenever I feel tired, I like to rest at home, lie in bed, and listen to music, which makes me feel refreshed.

Errors: 'laying' is the present participle of 'lay' (to put something down) but the intended verb is 'lie' (to recline); use base form 'lie' or 'lie down' after 'like to' which requires infinitive, so use 'lie' not 'laying' (verb form issue). 'Listening' should be parallel with other verbs: use 'listen' to match 'lie' (parallel structure). Repetition 'which makes my which makes me' is a duplication and should be 'which makes me feel refreshed'. Also 'rest in my house' is better as 'rest at home'. Suggestion: use infinitive or base forms for parallel verbs after expressions like 'like to', correct 'lay' vs 'lie', ensure parallel structure, and replace 'refreshing' (adjective) with 'refreshed' (past participle/adjective describing person).