Paper— Part 1 Relatório

Sugestão: 문장 구조와 문법을 다듬고 문장을 두세 개로 나누어 더 자연스럽고 명확하게 말하세요. 예를 들어 시제 일관성을 유지하고 관사(a/the)와 복수형을 정확히 사용하세요. 또한 연결어를 사용해 이유나 감정을 덧붙이면 답이 풍부해집니다.

Exemplo: Yes. When I was little, I made paper cranes as a form of origami. I enjoyed folding them because it was a relaxing and creative activity.

Sugestão: 불필요한 말(예: Absolutely) 대신 주제 문장으로 시작하고 시제를 과거로 통일하세요. 긴 문장은 둘로 나누어 연결어를 사용해 논리적으로 말하세요. 또한 'papers' 대신 'paper'나 'paper cranes' 같은 정확한 표현을 사용하세요.

Exemplo: I liked drawing on paper and making paper cranes when I was a child. I even tried to fold many cranes because I was told that making a thousand cranes would make a wish come true.

Sugestão: 문장을 더 자연스럽게 연결하고 관사와 전치사를 바로잡으세요. 'Exactly' 같은 단어는 불필요하니 빼고, 언제 쓰는지 구체적으로 말할 때는 상황과 대상에 대해 명확히 하세요.

Exemplo: Yes, I still write physical letters sometimes. For example, I send handwritten cards at Christmas or to celebrate a baby's birthday.

Sugestão: 표현을 명확하고 간결하게 고치세요. 'I used to say dependent person' 같은 문장은 뜻이 불명확하니 제거하고, 이유를 말할 때는 연결어(For some people... However...)를 사용하세요. 'memorable memories'처럼 중복되는 표현은 피하세요.

Exemplo: Some people still keep handwritten letters because they find them sentimental and meaningful. However, others throw them away because they consider them unnecessary clutter.

Sugestão: 답의 흐름을 더 명확히 하고 중복을 줄이세요. 이유를 설명할 때 구체적인 활동(예: taking notes, practicing problems)을 제시하면 좋습니다. 문장 끝을 명확하게 마무리하세요.

Exemplo: Yes, I usually carry a notebook and pens when I go out because I'm preparing for IT exams. I often jot down notes or practice problems whenever I get a spare moment.

× When I was little I made the crane with the papers it is kind of origami and I enjoyed that

✓ When I was little I made a crane out of paper; it was a kind of origami and I enjoyed it.

The phrase 'made the crane with the papers' is awkward: use 'made a crane out of paper' for materials. 'Papers' is countable plural but here 'paper' (uncountable) is correct. Also run-on sentence: separate into two clauses and use past 'was' and pronoun 'it'. Use article 'a' before 'crane'. Suggestion: Break into shorter sentences, use 'a' for singular countable nouns, and use 'paper' for material.

× Absolutely I like to draw something on the paper as well as I made a crane with papers because I have been told if I made a thousand of cranes, the dreams came true, so I made it.

✓ I definitely liked to draw on paper and I also made cranes because I was told that if I made a thousand cranes, my dreams would come true, so I did.

Tense inconsistency: the speaker is talking about childhood, so past tense should be used ('liked', 'made'). Use 'on paper' (no article). 'A thousand of cranes' is incorrect: say 'a thousand cranes'. Reported belief uses past simple + conditional 'would'. Replace 'so I made it' with 'so I did' or 'so I did that'. Suggestion: Keep past tense throughout when referring to childhood and use correct expressions for quantities.

× Yes, I write physical letters. Exactly I write a card when on Christmas or some babies are having a birthday, we send the handwritten card to babies.

✓ Yes, I write physical letters. For example, I write cards at Christmas or when babies have birthdays; we send handwritten cards to them.

Awkward adverb 'Exactly' and incorrect preposition 'on Christmas' should be 'at Christmas'. 'Some babies are having a birthday' is unnatural: use 'when babies have birthdays'. 'We send the handwritten card to babies' should be plural 'cards' and pronoun 'them'. Suggestion: Use natural time expressions ('at Christmas') and match number and pronouns correctly.

× I used to say dependent person. Some people keep handwritten letters because it is memorable memories and the others they thought it is just a waste so they don't want to keep the written letters.

✓ I used to be a sentimental person. Some people keep handwritten letters because they are memorable, while others think they are a waste and don't want to keep them.

'Used to say dependent person' is ungrammatical; likely meant 'used to be a sentimental person'. 'It is memorable memories' is redundant; use 'they are memorable'. 'The others they thought' has tense and subject issues; use present 'others think'. Match plural pronouns for 'letters' ('them'). Suggestion: Use clear subject-verb structure and avoid redundancy (memorable memories -> memorable). Keep consistent tense.

× Yes usually I carry paper and pens with me when I go out because these days I need to prepare IT tests so I always write down something on the note so I need it

✓ Yes, I usually carry paper and pens with me when I go out because these days I need to prepare for IT tests, so I always write notes and need them.

Missing preposition 'for' in 'prepare for IT tests'. 'Write down something on the note' is awkward; use 'write notes' or 'write something on a note'. Pronoun agreement: 'so I need it' should be 'so I need them' to match 'paper and pens' or 'notes'. Suggestion: Use 'prepare for' with exams, use plural pronouns to match plural nouns, and prefer concise phrases like 'write notes'.