Parks— Part 1 Relatório

Sugestão: Cần sửa ngữ pháp cơ bản (thì, mạo từ), giảm lặp từ và làm câu ngắn gọn rõ ràng. Nên mở đầu bằng câu chủ đề ngắn, tiếp theo cung cấp 1–2 chi tiết cụ thể (ví dụ: hoạt động, cảm xúc) dùng linking words như "and" hoặc "which" đúng cách. Giữ tối đa 5 câu.

Exemplo: Yes, I loved going to parks as a child. I used to ride my bike there with my father and we explored many corners together, which created some of my fondest memories. I especially remember playing near the big pond and feeding ducks, and those moments made me feel happy and free.

Sugestão: Cần chỉnh thì và động từ, tránh lặp ý. Bắt đầu bằng câu trực tiếp trả lời, sau đó dùng linking word như "because" hoặc "so" để giải thích lý do; cung cấp một ví dụ cụ thể (thời gian, hoạt động). Giữ câu ngắn gọn, tối đa 4 câu.

Exemplo: Yes, I still go to the park almost every weekend because it helps me relax from school stress. For example, I often sit under a tree and read or take a short walk, which clears my mind. This routine makes me feel calmer and more focused for the week ahead.

Sugestão: Cần diễn đạt rõ ràng, tránh tiếng ừm, sửa cấu trúc câu để trực tiếp trả lời. Sử dụng linking words như "because" để giải thích lợi ích (môi trường, sức khỏe) và đưa một ví dụ so sánh. Giữ câu ngắn, ko lặp từ.

Exemplo: Yes, I would like to see more parks in my city because they would make the area greener and improve people's wellbeing. For instance, more parks mean cleaner air and more spaces for families to exercise or relax, which would benefit the whole community.

Sugestão: Cần mạch lạc, sửa lỗi collocation ("relying in my city"), bỏ tiếng ừm. Nên mở đầu trực tiếp với ý muốn, sau đó nêu lý do cụ thể và một chi tiết bổ sung (ví dụ: hoạt động bạn sẽ làm ở đó). Dùng linking word như "because" hoặc "so".

Exemplo: Yes, I want to visit Kung Fu Park in Hanoi in the future because it has a wide variety of animals and plants. I would like to go alone to explore at my own pace and take photos of the wildlife, which would be a memorable experience.

× I really enjoy going to park to the park.

✓ I really enjoyed going to the park.

The sentence mixes present tense 'enjoy' with past context 'as a child'. Use past tense 'enjoyed'. Also missing article 'the' before 'park'. Suggestion: Use past tense consistently and include articles: 'I really enjoyed going to the park.'

× As a child I had a bike and I usually rode there with my father.

✓ As a child, I had a bike and I usually rode it to the park with my father.

Pronoun reference missing: 'rode there' is unclear. Add object 'it' for the bike and specify destination 'to the park'. Also add comma after introductory phrase. Suggestion: Clarify the object and destination: 'I usually rode it to the park with my father.'

× We circled around and explore many corners of the park and which are some of my fondest memories.

✓ We circled around and explored many corners of the park, which are some of my fondest memories.

Parallel verb forms required: 'circled' (past) should be matched with 'explored' (past), not present 'explore'. Remove extraneous 'and' before 'which' and use comma to introduce relative clause. Suggestion: Maintain past tense and correct clause linking: '...park, which are some of my fondest memories.'

× Currently I'm still go to the park at every weekends to relax my mind and depart brings me a sense of belonging and relaxing due to the busy shadow of my school work.

✓ Currently I still go to the park every weekend to relax my mind; it gives me a sense of belonging and relaxation because of the heavy burden of my schoolwork.

Errors: 'I'm still go' mixes forms; use 'I still go' or 'I'm still going'. 'At every weekends' incorrect preposition and plural—use 'every weekend'. 'Depart brings' is wrong word choice and structure; use 'it gives'. 'Relaxing' should be noun 'relaxation'. 'Busy shadow of my school work' is awkward—use 'heavy burden of my schoolwork'. Suggestion: Use correct verb form, proper prepositions, and natural expressions: 'I still go to the park every weekend... it gives me a sense of belonging and relaxation.'

× So I usually went there to relax my mind and to free myself.

✓ So I usually went there to relax my mind and free myself.

Redundant 'to' before 'free myself' is acceptable but can be streamlined. Ensure tense consistency: if referring to past habit, 'usually went' is fine; if present habit, use 'usually go'. Suggestion: Keep tense consistent with surrounding sentences; e.g., 'I usually went there...' or 'I usually go there...'.

× Currently in our cities, there's, uh, tree parks and two of them I have.

✓ Currently in our city, there are three parks, and I have been to two of them.

'There's' is singular; use 'there are' for plural. 'Tree' is a misspelling of 'three'. 'in our cities' vs context—likely singular 'our city'. 'Two of them I have' is incorrect word order; use 'I have been to two of them.' Suggestion: Use correct plural verb, correct number spelling, and natural word order: 'There are three parks ... I have been to two of them.'

× And I would say that more parks, more parks in the city would have the city to be greener and better for people to go there.

✓ I would say that more parks in the city would make the city greener and better for people to visit.

Awkward repetition and incorrect structure 'would have the city to be'. Use 'would make' to express causation and 'visit' instead of 'go there'. Suggestion: Use clear cause-effect structure: 'more parks... would make the city greener and better for people to visit.'

× In the future, I would go to Kung Fu Park in Hanoi by myself instead of relying in my city.

✓ In the future, I would like to go to Kung Fu Park in Hanoi by myself instead of staying in my city.

'Would go' can be acceptable but 'would like to go' expresses desire more naturally. 'Relying in my city' is incorrect; likely meant 'staying in my city'. Suggestion: Use 'would like to' for wishes and choose correct verbs for contrast: 'instead of staying in my city.'

× And the reason why I want to go to this park is due to the umm variety of animals and plants that it has and I would love to see it by my eyes.

✓ The reason I want to go to this park is the variety of animals and plants it has, and I would love to see them with my own eyes.

Use 'the reason I want' rather than 'the reason why I want'; 'due to' is awkward here—use 'is'. 'See it by my eyes' is incorrect: plural 'them' for animals and plants, and idiom is 'with my own eyes'. Suggestion: Use correct pronoun agreement and natural prepositional phrase: 'see them with my own eyes.'