Parks— Part 1 Relatório

Sugestão: Be more concise and correct small grammar errors. Start with a clear topic sentence, then add one or two specific supporting details using linking words. Avoid repeating words.

Exemplo: Yes, I loved going to parks as a child. For example, my family visited every weekend, and I often played football and games with my friends, which made those outings very memorable.

Sugestão: Organize the answer into a clear topic sentence and follow with specific details. Correct grammar and remove repetitions. Use linking words (for example, and) to make the response coherent.

Exemplo: Yes, I still enjoy going to parks. For example, I walk my dog there regularly, and we often play with a ball, which is good exercise for both of us.

Sugestão: Give a direct reason and one detailed example, avoid repetition and unclear statements. Use correct vocabulary (parks, environment) and clearer structure: topic sentence + reason + example + brief conclusion.

Exemplo: Yes, I would, because parks improve the environment and people's wellbeing. For instance, near my house the Osaka Castle park has many trees and green spaces, and I hope the city will create more parks like that in the future.

Sugestão: Provide a clear, specific example of a park you'd like to visit and explain why. Remove repetitions and add linking words to connect reasons. Mention one concrete activity you would do there.

Exemplo: Yes, I would like to visit famous parks abroad, for example Ueno Park in Tokyo, because I am curious about its cherry blossoms. I would like to go with my teacher and enjoy Japanese songs while walking there.

× I enjoyed playing the football and playing with my friends.

✓ I enjoyed playing football and playing with my friends.

The definite article 'the' is unnecessary before uncountable or general sports names. Use 'playing football' to refer to the activity in general. Suggestion: omit 'the' before sport names (e.g., 'playing tennis', 'playing football').

× I have a dog and we always take a walk and we always play with a with a boat with we always play was a ball at in the park.

✓ I have a dog and we always take a walk and always play with a ball in the park.

This sentence contains many word order and extra-word errors. The phrase 'take a walk' is correct, but 'play with a with a boat with we always play was a ball at in the park' is ungrammatical. Remove duplicated and wrong words, use 'play with a ball' and place 'in the park' at the end for correct word order. Suggestion: keep clauses simple and avoid repeating words.

× Yes I would because perks are good for environment.

✓ Yes, I would, because parks are good for the environment.

Two issues: 'perks' is a misspelling of 'parks' and the noun 'environment' requires the definite article 'the' when speaking about the environment in general. Also add commas for natural pauses. Suggestion: use 'parks' and 'the environment'.

× I love trees and greens.

✓ I love trees and green spaces.

'Greens' is informal and unclear. Use the noun phrase 'green spaces' to refer to areas with vegetation. 'Green' alone is an adjective and needs a noun. Suggestion: use 'green spaces' or 'greenery'.

× Near my house there is a Osaka castle which has lots of green and I believe, I hope I would.

✓ Near my house there is Osaka Castle, which has lots of greenery, and I hope so.

Use 'Osaka Castle' without an article; 'a' before a proper noun is incorrect. 'Lots of green' should be 'lots of greenery' or 'lots of green space'. The clause 'I believe, I hope I would' is ungrammatical; use 'I hope so' to express hope. Suggestion: remove the article before proper names and rephrase the hope clause.

× I believe I would like to have 5 like it more in the future in my city.

✓ I think I would like to have five more in the future in my city.

The original sentence is awkward and contains unclear phrasing 'have 5 like it more.' Use 'five more' to indicate quantity, and 'think' is more natural than 'believe' here. Also write numbers as words in formal speech. Suggestion: rephrase to 'I think I would like to have five more in my city in the future.'

× I want to go to the park and other other countries.

✓ I want to go to parks in other countries.

The phrase 'the park and other other countries' repeats 'other' and mixes singular 'the park' with plural 'countries.' Use 'parks in other countries' to mean parks located in foreign countries. Suggestion: make number and preposition consistent.

× I want to know how it looks like and I want to bring my teacher there and I want to play Japanese song together.

✓ I want to know what they look like, and I want to bring my teacher there so we can play Japanese songs together.

'How it looks like' is ungrammatical; use 'what they look like' or 'how it looks' (not both 'how' and 'like'). Also 'Japanese song' should be plural 'Japanese songs' if you mean more than one, and 'play ... together' needs a subject for 'together' — rephrase to 'so we can play Japanese songs together.' Suggestion: choose correct question word ('what' or 'how') and ensure verbs and pronouns agree with plural 'parks'.