Parks— Part 1 Relatório

Sugestão: Be direct and fluent: start with a clear topic sentence, avoid fillers and unclear words, correct grammar (e.g. 'go to parks', 'made new friends'), and give one or two specific supporting details linked logically. Keep it under five sentences.

Exemplo: Yes, I loved going to parks as a child. I often went there with my parents on weekends, and I made new friends on the swings and slides. Those visits were fun because we would play until sunset and then buy ice cream on the way home.

Sugestão: Answer directly, use correct grammar and complete the sentence. State a clear reason and one specific example of what you do in the park to relax. Use linking words like 'because' and 'so' appropriately.

Exemplo: Yes, I still enjoy going to parks because my full workday often makes me tired. I go there to walk or sit under trees to relax, and sometimes I read a book for an hour to clear my mind.

Sugestão: Make a concise opinion first, then give two specific reasons using linking words (e.g. 'because' and 'also'). Avoid repetition and improve grammar ('benefit' → 'be beneficial').

Exemplo: Yes, I would like more parks in my city because parks attract tourists and provide green spaces for residents to relax. Also, well-designed parks can host cultural events that help preserve local traditions.

Sugestão: Give a clear specific example and a reason. Correct the place name usage (Disneyland is an amusement park) and use a short explanation of what you expect to do there. Keep it under five sentences.

Exemplo: Yes, I would love to visit Disneyland in the future because it is a famous amusement park with many attractions and shows. I want to try the rides and explore themed areas with friends or family.

× Absolutely, I liked to go parks when I was a child.

✓ Absolutely, I liked going to parks when I was a child.

The verb pattern 'like' followed by another verb commonly uses the -ing form (gerund) to express general enjoyment. Also 'go parks' needs the preposition 'to' before 'parks'; corrected sentence uses 'liked going to parks'.

× I enjoyed their, uh, tomato for new friends also, uh, playing in slides and swings and, umm, I remembered that my parents took me there, uh, once, you know, we weekend so I.

✓ I enjoyed meeting new friends, also playing on slides and swings, and I remember that my parents took me there on weekends.

Multiple errors: 'their' is incorrect for 'meeting' or 'finding' new friends; 'tomato' is wrong word choice and replaced by 'meeting'; 'playing in slides' should be 'playing on slides'; 'I remembered' should be 'I remember' for habitual past recollection or kept as past 'I remembered' depending on intention — here consistent simple past/past habitual works as 'I remember' or 'I remembered that my parents took me there on weekends.' Also 'we weekend so I' is ungrammatical; corrected to 'on weekends.' Suggestions: use correct verbs (meet meeting), correct preposition 'on' for slides/swings, and 'on weekends' for habitual time reference.

× Of course I like going to the parks because of the whole day workload makes me exhausted and stressed, so to reduce my that stress I usually go to.

✓ Of course I like going to parks because a whole day’s workload makes me exhausted and stressed, so to reduce that stress I usually go there.

Use of the article: 'the parks' is acceptable but 'going to parks' is more general. 'the whole day workload' needs an article and possessive: 'a whole day’s workload'. 'my that stress' has extra determiner; use 'that stress' or 'my stress'. The sentence ends with missing object; add 'there' to indicate 'to the park'. Suggestion: choose correct articles and possessive forms, remove conflicting determiners, and complete phrasal verbs with objects.

× Definitely, I would like to see more parks in our city and now because of the establishment offer, uh, new parks, uh, helps to gain the tourist attraction and help to boost the help to boost the, uh, local cultures and the traditions which will be benefit.

✓ Definitely, I would like to see more parks in our city because establishing new parks helps attract tourists and boosts local culture and traditions, which will be beneficial.

Pronoun and noun usage: 'the establishment offer' is awkward; rephrased to 'establishing new parks'. 'helps to gain the tourist attraction' should be 'helps attract tourists'. Repetition 'help to boost the help to boost' removed. 'local cultures and the traditions which will be benefit' needs article and adjective: 'local culture and traditions, which will be beneficial.' Suggestions: use active verbs (establishing), avoid repetition, and use correct adjective forms ('beneficial').

× Yes, there are lots of parks in our country which I want to go in the future like Disneyland which is located in zone where we can explore the new things and can enjoy.

✓ Yes, there are lots of parks in our country that I want to visit in the future, like Disneyland, which is located in a zone where we can explore new things and enjoy ourselves.

Sentence needed correction of 'want to go in the future' to 'want to visit in the future' (verb choice). Added relative pronoun 'that' and article 'a zone'. 'Explore the new things' should be 'explore new things'. 'Can enjoy' improved to 'enjoy ourselves' for reflexive sense. Suggestions: use appropriate verbs ('visit' for places), include articles where needed, and use reflexive pronoun for doing something to oneself ('enjoy ourselves').