Parks— Part 1 Relatório

Sugestão: Be more concise and correct grammar. Start with a clear topic sentence, avoid fillers and repetitions, correct verb forms and articles, and add one specific detail. Use one linking word if adding detail.

Exemplo: Yes. I loved going to the park with my grandpa when I was a child. It was a great place to unwind after kindergarten and to meet other children; for example, I often played hide-and-seek with neighborhood kids on the grass.

Sugestão: Fix grammar and sentence clarity. Begin with a direct topic sentence, then give one or two specific, linked reasons. Avoid repetition (e.g., "really" many times) and incorrect verb forms.

Exemplo: Yes, I still enjoy going to parks. They help me relax and clear my mind after a busy day of studying, and I often sit on a bench to read or listen to music so I can recharge for the evening.

Sugestão: Be specific and correct word choice. State your main opinion, then give two clear, linked reasons with accurate vocabulary (e.g., "improve air quality", "provide recreational facilities"). Avoid awkward phrases like "avoid and have more place to visit."

Exemplo: Yes, I would. More parks would improve the city's air quality and provide recreational facilities such as playgrounds and walking paths, so residents would have healthier places to exercise and relax.

Sugestão: Use correct tense and smoother phrasing. Start with a clear statement of which park you mean, then explain why with specific activities. Correct gerunds and verbs (e.g., "lying on the grass", "doing some homework"). Avoid hesitations and fillers.

Exemplo: Yes. I would like to visit the park at Stanford University because it looks spacious and peaceful. I imagine lying on the grass there to study or relax, which would be an inspiring change from my usual study spots.

× I used to go to the park with my grandpa, which is such really great activities for me to watch and to to let my head out after kindergarten.

✓ I used to go to the park with my grandpa, which was a really great activity for me to watch and to let my mind be free after kindergarten.

The original sentence uses plural 'activities' and awkward verb forms. 'Which is' should match 'activity' (singular) and the participle structure 'to let my head out' is idiomatic error. Use 'was' for past context and 'activity' singular; 'let my mind be free' is a clearer phrasing.

× It's such a really like great spot for me to make new friends and play together with other people.

✓ It was such a great spot for me to make new friends and play with other children.

The original contains redundant and informal modifiers ('such a really like great') and awkward collocations ('play together with other people'). Use one adjective 'great' and a natural collocation 'play with other children'. Also keep past tense 'was' to match 'used to'.

× I really enjoy going to the park now because it's such a really great activity for me to relax and also to immerse in my own world after a really hectic schedule of studying at school.

✓ I really enjoy going to the park now because it's a great way for me to relax and immerse myself in my own world after a hectic day of studying at school.

Reduce redundant modifiers ('such a really great' -> 'a great way') and correct verb pattern 'immerse myself' (requires reflexive pronoun). Use 'day' instead of 'schedule' for natural collocation.

× Because now I getting much older, I become much older stressful.

✓ Because I'm getting older, I become more stressed.

Missing auxiliary 'am' for continuous tense; 'getting' requires 'am getting'. Use comparative form 'more stressed' instead of 'much older stressful', and 'become' with adjective 'stressed'.

× So a part would be something really useful for me.

✓ So the park is something really useful for me.

Original sentence 'a part' is unclear and ungrammatical. Likely intended 'the park' or 'a park'; choose 'the park' for context. Rephrase to clear subject-verb structure.

× I really want to see more parks in university because I think it's such a really great way to also enhance the overall quality air quality in our city, but also to provide more physical facilities for people to avoid and have more place to visit.

✓ I really want to see more parks at the university because I think they are a great way to enhance the overall air quality in our city and to provide more recreational spaces for people to visit.

Use preposition 'at' with 'the university'. Replace 'it's such a really great way' with 'they are a great way' to agree with plural 'parks'. Fix 'quality air quality' redundancy and unclear phrase 'physical facilities for people to avoid' — replace with 'recreational spaces'.

× Yes, there was a park in Stanford which is such a really, uh, big and like top tier university in the world.

✓ Yes, there is a park at Stanford, which is a very big, top-tier university in the world.

If referring to current existence, use present 'is' not past 'was'. Use article 'a' before 'very big' and hyphenate 'top-tier'. Replace informal fillers and 'in Stanford' with 'at Stanford'.

× So I want to go there and laying on the grass and doing of some of my homework, which is always my dream.

✓ So I want to go there, lie on the grass, and do some of my homework, which has always been my dream.

Use base verbs after 'want to' ('lie', 'do'), not gerunds. Remove 'of' after 'doing'. For time consistency, use present perfect 'has always been' for an ongoing dream.

× So that would be the park I really want to go in the future.

✓ So that would be the park I really want to go to in the future.

The correct preposition with 'go' + destination is 'to' (go to a place), not 'in'.