Parks— Part 1 Relatório

Sugestão: Be more natural and concise. Start with a clear topic sentence answering the question, then add one or two specific supporting details. Avoid capitalization errors and unnecessary repetition. Use linking words (for example, “because” or “so”) to connect ideas and keep sentences to a maximum of five. Also correct minor grammar (e.g., “I remember going to Result Park,” not “Remember Me”).

Exemplo: Yes, I loved going to parks as a child. For example, I often went to Result Park in Malaybalay City because it was close to the city center and my parents liked taking me there. As a result, I have many happy memories and I still visit sometimes.

Sugestão: Make your response smoother and avoid hesitations and repetitions. Begin with a direct answer, then give a concise reason with a specific detail. Replace vague phrases like “a whole lot of feeling away from reality” with clearer language (for example, “a break from daily stress”). Keep to two or three sentences and use linking words like “but” or “because.”

Exemplo: Yes, I still enjoy going to parks, but I'm quite busy with work and studies. I love them because they give me a peaceful break from daily stress and a chance to relax in nature.

Sugestão: Answer directly and give specific reasons or examples. Avoid filler phrases like “you know” and be clear about what kind of parks you mean (playgrounds, green spaces, family-friendly parks). Use linking words such as “because” or “so” to explain benefits of more parks for the community.

Exemplo: Absolutely. I would like more family-friendly parks in my city because they would provide safe play areas for children and quiet green spaces for adults to relax. For instance, community parks with playgrounds and jogging paths would benefit many families.

Sugestão: Be precise and avoid contradictory or confused geographic statements. Start with a clear topic sentence naming the park or type of park, then give one specific reason why you want to visit (e.g., particular rides, shows). Remove filler words (“umm”) and keep to two or three sentences for clarity.

Exemplo: Yes, I would like to visit an amusement park in Manila in the future. I have heard it offers many exciting rides and attractions, and I would love to try the roller coasters and see the live shows.

× I can vividly Remember Me going to the Result Park which is a famous attraction here in our place Malaybalay City.

✓ I can vividly remember going to Result Park, which is a famous attraction here in our place, Malaybalay City.

The pronoun 'Me' is incorrectly used after 'remember.' After 'remember' when referring to one's own past action, use the gerund without a subject pronoun ('remember going') or use a full clause ('I remember that I went'). Also 'Remember' should not be capitalized mid-sentence. Add commas to set off the nonrestrictive clause and the place name for clarity. Suggestion: Use 'remember' + verb-ing for recalling past experiences and avoid adding 'me' (e.g., 'I remember going to Result Park').

× It is located in city center and I always ask my parents to bring me there.

✓ It is located in the city center and I always asked my parents to bring me there.

'City center' needs the definite article 'the' because it refers to a specific place. The original context is past (as a child), so the verb 'ask' should be in the past tense 'asked' to keep tense consistency with 'remember going' earlier. Suggestion: Use articles with fixed place names ('the city center') and keep tense consistent within a narrative about the past.

× So it goes to show that I really enjoy doing it and as time passes by, I still visit.

✓ So it shows that I really enjoyed it, and even as time passed, I continued to visit.

The sentence mixes present and past tense inconsistently. The context is about childhood habits; therefore past tense ('enjoyed', 'continued') is appropriate. 'It goes to show' is phrased awkwardly for this context; 'So it shows' or 'This shows' is clearer. Suggestion: Maintain consistent past tense when describing past habits.

× Of course, if given a chance, I can still visit the park every single day.

✓ Of course, if given the chance, I could still visit the park every single day.

When speaking hypothetically about what you would do if given a chance, use 'could' (or 'would') rather than 'can.' 'If given a chance' is better as 'if given the chance.' Suggestion: Use could/would for hypothetical situations (e.g., 'If given the chance, I would visit every day').

× However, I'm still busy. But I can I can really say that I still like it.

✓ However, I'm still busy, but I can really say that I still like it.

There is a repeated phrase 'I can I can' which is a duplication error. Combining the two clauses with a comma before 'but' produces a single coherent sentence. Suggestion: Proofread to remove repeated words and combine short related sentences for flow.

× No, I love going to parks because it just gives me a whole lot of feeling away from reality.

✓ No, I love going to parks because they give me a strong feeling of being away from reality.

'Gives me a whole lot of feeling' is unnatural; use 'give me a strong feeling' and change 'it' to 'they' to agree with the plural 'parks.' Also rephrase 'feeling away from reality' to 'feeling of being away from reality' for clarity. Suggestion: Match subject number with verb and use natural collocations ('a strong feeling of being away from reality').

× I want to explore a lot of places and, you know, feel the kid inside me.

✓ I want to explore a lot of places and, you know, feel the child inside me.

'Feel the kid inside me' is colloquial and 'kid' can be changed to 'child' for standard English in a test context. This is more a word choice than strict grammar but improves register. Suggestion: Use 'child' in formal or test responses.

× I want to visit a specific park in the other city and the other towns, which provides parks for kids as well as the adults.

✓ I want to visit specific parks in other cities and towns, which provide facilities for kids as well as adults.

'A specific park in the other city and the other towns' is unclear and uses singular/plural inconsistently. Change to plural 'parks' and 'other cities and towns.' 'Which provides' should agree with plural 'parks' so use 'provide.' Also 'the adults' should be 'adults.' Suggestion: Ensure subject and verb agree in number and be precise about singular vs plural.

× Of course I would want to go to a an amusement park in Manila which is in the South in the northern part of the Philippines.

✓ Of course I would like to go to an amusement park in Manila, which is in the southern part of the Philippines.

There is an extra article 'a an' — keep 'an.' 'Would want to' is wordy; 'would like to' is more natural for expressing desire. 'The South in the northern part' is contradictory; Manila is in the southern part of Luzon island but not 'northern part of the Philippines'; use 'southern part' if intended. Also add a comma before the nonrestrictive clause. Suggestion: Use 'an amusement park' and ensure geographic descriptions are accurate and not contradictory.

× I heard that they have a lot of umm rides and attractions and I would love to explore it myself.

✓ I heard that they have a lot of rides and attractions, and I would love to explore them myself.

Fillers like 'umm' should be omitted in written answers. 'Rides and attractions' is plural, so the pronoun referring to them should be plural ('them') not 'it.' Combine clauses with a comma before 'and.' Suggestion: Remove fillers and ensure pronoun number matches the noun it replaces.