Parks— Part 1 Relatório

Sugestão: Be more concise and grammatically correct. Start with a clear topic sentence, avoid repetition, correct tense and article use, and briefly give specific details about the games and feelings. Reduce hesitation and filler words.

Exemplo: Yes. I loved going to parks as a child. I often played basketball and football with neighbourhood kids, and we also played a traditional game called Kaya Mushak. Those visits felt exciting because I made close friends and learned teamwork.

Sugestão: Give a clear main sentence and support it with one or two concise reasons using linking words. Avoid filler words and emotional repetition; be specific about what you enjoy doing in parks now.

Exemplo: Yes, I still enjoy going to parks because they remind me of my childhood and help me relax. For example, I like watching children play and reading on a bench, which makes me feel peaceful and nostalgic.

Sugestão: Answer directly then add a short reason with specific examples. Fix grammar (tense and parallelism) and remove unnecessary phrases like “maybe you don't believe me.” Use linking words such as “because” or “so” to connect ideas.

Exemplo: Yes, I would. I have visited most parks in my city because I enjoy walking, playing badminton, and lying on the grass to relax, so more parks would give me greater variety.

Sugestão: Be specific and avoid vague or emotional phrases like “real life for me.” Give a clear reason why you want to visit Central Park and one detail about what you would do there. Reduce hesitations and repetition.

Exemplo: Yes. One park I want to visit is Central Park in New York City because I admire its size and diverse attractions. For instance, I would like to rent a bike to explore the paths and visit the Conservatory Garden.

× I remember that day when I was a child and I really enjoy to go to the park and play with other children, play basketball or football or we have a traditional, uh game.

✓ I remember the days when I was a child and I really enjoyed going to the park to play with other children, play basketball or football, or play a traditional game.

Mixed tense and verb form errors: 'remember that day' should be plural 'the days' or 'that day' needs consistent reference; speaker refers to past so use past tense 'enjoyed' not present 'enjoy'. 'Enjoy to go' is incorrect collocation — 'enjoy' should be followed by a gerund: 'enjoy going'. Also 'we have a traditional game' in past context should be 'played a traditional game'. Suggestion: keep past tense consistently and use gerunds after 'enjoy' and 'play' when describing habitual activities in the past.

× It's called Kaya Mushak, and I really Miss World.

✓ It's called Kaya Mushak, and I really miss it.

'Miss World' is unclear and capitalized incorrectly here; likely intended to say 'miss it' referring to the game. 'Miss' as a verb should be lowercase and followed by the object pronoun 'it'. Use appropriate pronoun to refer back to the game.

× I really do because, uh, it's very, uh, nostalgic to me.

✓ I really do because it feels very nostalgic to me.

'Nostalgic to me' is understandable but 'feel nostalgic' is the natural collocation in English. Using 'feels' matches present-state description. Suggestion: use 'feel' plus adjective for emotional states.

× And sometimes I watch children and I really enjoy it to see them happy and I really wish I could be a child again.

✓ And sometimes I watch children and I really enjoy seeing them happy, and I really wish I could be a child again.

'Enjoy it to see' is incorrect structure: 'enjoy' should be followed by a gerund ('seeing'), not an infinitive or 'it to see'. Replace with 'enjoy seeing'. The rest 'wish I could be a child again' is correct past-subjunctive desire.

× Maybe you don't believe me but I saw most of the parks in my city because one of the best uh hobbies for me is going to the park and walking, play badminton and lie down in the grass.

✓ Maybe you don't believe me but I have seen most of the parks in my city because one of my favorite hobbies is going to the park to walk, play badminton, and lie down on the grass.

Tense and collocation: 'saw most of the parks' is acceptable but present perfect 'have seen' better connects past experience to present. 'One of the best uh hobbies for me' is unnatural; use 'one of my favorite hobbies'. Parallel verb forms required: 'going to the park to walk, play badminton, and lie down' and preposition 'on the grass' is correct instead of 'in the grass'.

× Yes, there are. And one of the most, uh, favorites is Central Park in New York City and I really, uh, want to go there one day because I really love it and uh, it can be, uh, real life for me.

✓ Yes, there are. One of my favorites is Central Park in New York City, and I really want to go there one day because I really love it and it would be like a dream come true for me.

Awkward phrasing and tense/modal choice: 'one of the most favorites' is incorrect; use 'one of my favorites'. 'It can be real life for me' is unnatural; to express aspiration use modal 'would be' and an idiom such as 'like a dream come true'. Keep present desire 'want to go' and use conditional 'would be' for hypothetical emotional impact.