Parks— Part 1 Relatório

Sugestão: Cải thiện ngữ pháp (thì và số ít/những từ bị lặp), dùng câu chủ đề rõ ràng và rút gọn thông tin thừa. Nên dùng thì quá khứ đơn (I enjoyed) và thay các cụm lặp bằng từ phù hợp; sắp xếp ý theo cấu trúc: câu chủ đề + 1–2 chi tiết cụ thể. Tránh dùng quá nhiều tính từ chung chung (very wide, very large) và sửa lỗi động từ/ danh từ (have -> had).

Exemplo: Yes, I enjoyed going to parks when I was a child. I liked playing on the swings and climbing frames, and I also enjoyed the fresh air and open space. For example, my friends and I often played hide-and-seek near the big oak tree.

Sugestão: Sử dụng câu ngắn gọn, mạch lạc; tránh lặp từ (“now”, “park”) và hoàn thành câu. Dùng linking words để kết nối ý (for example, because, so) và sửa ngữ pháp (go to the park, feel relaxed). Thêm một ví dụ cụ thể về thời gian hoặc hoạt động để làm rõ.

Exemplo: Yes, I still enjoy going to the park. I often go for walks there to get some fresh air and relax after a busy day, so I feel less stressed. For example, I usually visit the park on weekends with friends and we walk for about an hour.

Sugestão: Tránh lặp từ và hoàn thiện ý. Dùng câu rõ ràng: nêu lí do chính rồi giải thích cụ thể (ví dụ: nơi tập thể dục, gặp gỡ bạn bè). Sử dụng linking words (because, so, therefore) và sửa ngữ pháp: "suitable for people who want to relax" hoặc "work" nên cụ thể (work outdoors?).

Exemplo: Yes, I would. More parks would give people places to exercise, relax and meet friends, which is important in a busy city. For instance, a new park near my house would let residents walk their dogs or do morning yoga.

Sugestão: Rõ ràng hóa tên địa điểm (Disneyland), tránh dùng "park" chung chung; sửa lỗi ngữ pháp và cấu trúc (I can meet people, enjoy food, try rides). Hạn chế câu ngắn lặp, dùng câu có kết cấu rõ: lý do + ví dụ cụ thể. Dùng từ vựng chính xác (rides, attractions, meet friends).

Exemplo: I would like to visit Disneyland in the future because it has many attractions and activities. For example, I want to try the rides, watch the parades and enjoy different food stalls with friends.

× When I was a child, I really enjoy going to the park because I want to play games in the park and enjoy the fresh air around around here because park is very wide, very large and have more games and activities in.

✓ When I was a child, I really enjoyed going to the park because I wanted to play games and enjoy the fresh air there; the park was very wide and had many games and activities.

Use past simple for habits and states in the past (enjoy -> enjoyed, want -> wanted). Use correct noun phrases and articles (the park). Use past tense for 'have' (had). Combine and reduce repetition for clarity. Suggestions: practice forming past simple for regular verbs (add -ed) and use 'the' for a specific park; replace 'more' with 'many' when quantifying countable nouns.

× Nowadays, I still like going to park because I can walk and enjoy the fresh air in the park.

✓ Nowadays, I still like going to the park because I can walk and enjoy the fresh air there.

Use the definite article 'the' before 'park' when referring to a specific park (going to the park). 'There' is more natural than repeating 'in the park'. Suggestions: remember to use 'the' with singular nouns when both speaker and listener know which one is meant.

× Now because I want to feel more comfortable and relaxing after a busy day.

✓ I go because I want to feel more comfortable and relaxed after a busy day.

Original is a sentence fragment beginning with 'Now because'. Also use adjective 'relaxed' (not 'relaxing') to describe a feeling. Recast into a full sentence with subject and verb. Suggestions: avoid sentence fragments; ensure each sentence has a subject and a verb, and use correct adjective forms to describe states.

× I usually go to park at the weekend with my friends or.

✓ I usually go to the park at the weekend with my friends.

Add 'the' before 'park'; remove trailing 'or' which makes the sentence incomplete. Suggestions: check for incomplete sentences and unnecessary conjunctions at the end.

× Yes, I would like to see more parks in my city because I because it is suitable for people who want to, who want to work and enjoy the fresh air after a busy day.

✓ Yes, I would like to see more parks in my city because they are suitable for people who want to work and enjoy the fresh air after a busy day.

Avoid repetition ('because I because it'). Use plural 'they' to refer to 'parks'. Remove the repeated 'who want to'. Suggestions: ensure pronouns agree in number with their antecedents and avoid repeated phrases.

× The park I want to go to in the future is Disney because I really enjoy activities in here.

✓ The park I want to go to in the future is Disneyland because I really enjoy the activities there.

Use correct proper name 'Disneyland' if intended; use 'the activities' and 'there' instead of 'in here'. 'In here' is inappropriate when speaking about a place you will visit. Suggestions: use correct place names and use 'there' for referring to locations; include 'the' before plural/specific activities.

× This is an interesting park. I can do anything in here such as play or enjoy food or can miss meet everyone in here.

✓ This is an interesting park. I can do many things there, such as play, enjoy food, or meet people I miss.

Use 'there' not 'in here' for a place to be visited. 'Do anything' is too broad; 'many things' is natural. 'Miss meet everyone' is ungrammatical — separate 'miss' and 'meet'; suggest 'meet people I miss' or 'meet everyone I know'. Suggestions: use correct prepositions ('there'), avoid 'anything' when listing activities, and order verbs properly (meet people I miss).