Parks— Part 1 Relatório

Sugestão: 文法と発音の誤り、語彙の選択ミス、冗長な表現を改善してください。まず、動詞の時制と形（e.g. "used to go" や "I usually went"）を正しく使い、冠詞や複数形にも注意しましょう。また、「UMM tour」のような意味不明な語は避け、具体的な活動（playing, feeding ducks, having picnics 等）を述べると自然です。回答は最大5文に抑え、最初に直接的なトピック文を置き、その後に一つか二つの具体例を接続詞（because, and, so）でつなぎましょう。

Exemplo: Yes, I loved going to parks as a child. I usually went with my brother, and we spent hours playing on the swings and feeding the ducks. Because the park was close to our house, we visited almost every weekend and made many happy memories.

Sugestão: 文法（現在形と過去形の混同）を直し、語句の選択を明確にしてください。例えば "my house is near the park" のように単語を正確に使い、時制を統一します。思い出を述べる際は過去の習慣は過去形、現在の好みは現在形で表現し、理由や具体例を一つ加えると説得力が増します。不要なフィラー（uh等）は減らしましょう。

Exemplo: Yes, I still like going to parks. My house is near a large park, so I often walk there with my grandparents at weekends. I enjoy the fresh air and peaceful atmosphere, which helps me relax.

Sugestão: アイデアを論理的に整理して、正しい文法で明確に表現してください。意見を述べる際はトピックセンテンスを先に置き、その後に理由を具体的に述べます（e.g. "Parks reduce pollution, provide recreation"）。また比較や対比をすると良いですが、"more buildings and mansions" のような表現は文脈に合っていないため、"instead of more buildings" のように正しく言い換えてください。

Exemplo: Yes, I would like more parks in my city. Parks make the city calmer and improve air quality, so they are better than building more apartments in every empty space. For example, new parks could provide places for children to play and for adults to exercise.

Sugestão: 志望を述べるときは、目的地や理由を具体的に示してください。繰り返しやフィラーを減らし、正しい前置詞（"abroad" は副詞、"parks abroad" や "a park abroad" のように使う）を使いましょう。具体的な公園名やそこに行きたい理由（scenery, activities, famous attractions）を一つ挙げると説得力が増します。

Exemplo: Yes, I would like to visit some famous parks abroad. For example, I hope to go to Yellowstone National Park in the USA because I want to see the geysers and wildlife. In the future I plan to save money and travel there for a one-week trip.

× Yes I did, I usually going to park with my brother.

✓ Yes, I did. I usually went to the park with my brother.

The original uses 'usually going' which is incorrect because 'usually' requires a main verb form. In past habitual context use past simple 'usually went'. Also add articles and punctuation: 'the park'. Suggestion: use 'I usually went to the park with my brother.'

× Park is a very good UMM tour and I love it.

✓ The park was a very good time and I loved it.

'Park' needs the definite article 'the'. 'UMM tour' is unclear; likely intended 'time' or 'memory'. Match tense with previous 'Yes I did' (past), so use past 'was' and 'loved'. Suggestion: use clear nouns and correct articles.

× Yes, I do uh, my horse near the park.

✓ Yes, I do. My house is near the park.

The sentence mixes present affirmation with a fragment. 'horse' is likely a misspelling of 'house'. Use 'is' to link subject and location. Suggestion: say 'My house is near the park.'

× I went to the park with my grandmother, grandfather in weekend.

✓ I went to the park with my grandmother and grandfather on the weekend.

Missing conjunction 'and' between 'grandmother' and 'grandfather'. Use the preposition 'on' with 'the weekend' in this context. Suggestion: 'I went to the park with my grandmother and grandfather on the weekend.'

× It's a very good memories.

✓ They're very good memories.

'memories' is plural, so pronoun must match: 'They are' or 'They're'. Also 'very good memories' keeps plural agreement. Suggestion: 'They're very good memories.'

× Yes, absolutely Park makes me a relaxed and peaceful.

✓ Yes, absolutely. The park makes me feel relaxed and peaceful.

Need the definite article 'the' before 'park'. 'Makes me a relaxed and peaceful' is ungrammatical; use 'makes me feel relaxed and peaceful'. Suggestion: use 'feel' after 'makes me'. Also punctuation fixes.

× So I in my opinions park is uh more buildings and mansions and not.

✓ So, in my opinion, the park has more buildings and mansions and not much green space.

Use singular 'opinion' not 'opinions'. Need commas and 'the park'. The original 'more buildings and mansions and not' is incomplete; clarify contrast: 'not much green space'. Suggestion: restructure sentence for clarity.

× I want to, I want to uh, abroad park, for example, uh, USA and the big park is there.

✓ I want to visit parks abroad; for example, parks in the USA which are very large.

'abroad park' is incorrect word order; use 'visit parks abroad'. 'USA' needs 'in the USA'. Clarify 'the big park is there' as 'parks in the USA which are very large'. Suggestion: use 'visit parks abroad, for example in the USA.'

× So in the future I will try it.

✓ So in the future I will try to visit them.

'try it' is vague and 'visit them' refers back to parks. Use infinitive 'try to visit' to express intent. Suggestion: 'I will try to visit them in the future.'