Hobby— Part 1 Relatório

Sugestão: Be more concise and clear: start with a direct topic sentence, then give specific supporting details. Reduce hesitations and redundant phrases, and use linking words to connect ideas. For example, say what genres you read, why you enjoy them, and how often you read. Aim for 2–4 sentences, fluent delivery, and correct collocation (e.g., "read fantasy and horror novels" not "English of fantasy").

Exemplo: I enjoy several hobbies, especially reading novels. I mainly read fantasy and horror novels because I like imaginative plots and suspenseful stories, and I usually read for an hour each evening to relax.

Sugestão: Provide a clear topic sentence and add specific details with linking words. Use correct tense and concise phrases (e.g., "I used to dance when I got tired during studying"). Explain how dancing helped you and perhaps give an example or frequency. Keep answers within 2–4 sentences and avoid repetition.

Exemplo: Yes, I used to dance as a child. Dancing helped me relax and feel energetic again after studying, so whenever I felt tired I would dance for about 10–15 minutes to refresh myself.

Sugestão: Be concise and correct with time expressions and durations. Use linking words (e.g., "and", "so") to connect ideas and avoid unnatural durations unless realistic. One and a half hours during study breaks is long; specify shorter breaks if true. Fix grammar ("I have danced since childhood" or "I've had this hobby since I was a child").

Exemplo: Yes, I have practiced dancing since I was a child and I still do it. During long study sessions of five to six hours, I take short breaks and usually dance for about 10–20 minutes to relax and re-energize.

Sugestão: Answer directly and avoid repetition. Give a specific comparison and complete the explanation. Use linking words like "however" or "while" to contrast your hobby with family members'. Provide a clear result or reason (e.g., "he relaxes by browsing his phone"). Keep it to 2–3 sentences and finish thoughts fully.

Exemplo: No, we have different hobbies. While I dance to relax after studying, my father prefers to browse his phone to unwind, so we usually spend our free time in different ways.

× Yes, I do have many hobbies like reading story books.

✓ Yes, I have many hobbies, such as reading storybooks.

The original sentence uses 'do have' which is unnecessary for a simple affirmative present statement; use simple present 'have'. Also 'story books' is better as the compound noun 'storybooks' or 'story books' as one term and 'like' is more formal as 'such as'. Suggestion: use simple present for possession and combine the noun.

× It basically includes English of fantasy books and Horror Story books.

✓ They are mainly fantasy and horror storybooks in English.

The structure 'includes English of fantasy books' is ungrammatical. Use plural subject 'they' or refer to 'my reading' and say 'mainly fantasy and horror storybooks in English.' Also 'Horror Story' should not be capitalized and 'storybooks' is one word. Ensure articles and noun forms match.

× Which, you know, makes me uh, read. Makes me feel read in uh again.

✓ Reading them makes me want to read more and refreshes me.

The original has fragmentary and unclear clauses ('makes me read', 'feel read in again') and informal fillers. Convert to a full sentence showing cause and effect: 'Reading them makes me want to read more and refreshes me.' This clarifies meaning and fixes sentence fragments.

× Yes, I had the hobby when I was a child and it was dancing.

✓ Yes, I had a hobby as a child: dancing.

Use a more natural past-tense phrasing. 'Had the hobby when I was a child' is wordy; 'had a hobby as a child' is concise. Maintain past tense 'had'.

× Dancing makes me relax and I feel enthusiastic for doing my next work that is after studying.

✓ Dancing helps me relax and makes me feel enthusiastic about doing the next task after studying.

'Makes me relax' should be 'helps me relax' or 'makes me relaxed'; 'enthusiastic for doing' is incorrect collocation — use 'enthusiastic about doing'. 'Next work that is after studying' is awkward; use 'the next task after studying.'

× I used to dance when I get tired in middle of my studies.

✓ I used to dance when I got tired in the middle of my studies.

The sentence mixes past habit 'used to' with present 'get'; both verbs should be past: 'used to' + 'got'. Also include the article 'the' before 'middle'.

× Yes, I do have a hobby when I was a child that is dancing and I'm still practicing it right now.

✓ Yes, I have had a hobby since I was a child: dancing, and I am still practicing it now.

The original mixes present 'do have' with past 'when I was a child.' Use present perfect 'have had' or 'have had ... since' to indicate a hobby from childhood continuing to now. Also 'right now' is redundant with 'still'; 'practicing it now' is fine.

× Also during my study hours that is five to six hours.

✓ Also, during my study period, which is five to six hours,

The phrase 'study hours that is five to six hours' is ungrammatical. Use 'which is' to refer to the period and make it a relative clause. Better: 'during my study period, which is five to six hours.'

× When I get tired I usually dance for one and a half hour.

✓ When I get tired, I usually dance for one and a half hours.

Use plural 'hours' after 'one and a half'. Also add a comma after the subordinate clause. 'Usually dance' is fine in present habitual context.

× That makes my body relaxed and make me feel.

✓ That relaxes my body and lifts my mood.

Original has subject-verb disagreement and an incomplete phrase 'make me feel.' Use active verb 'relaxes' and provide a complete complement 'lifts my mood.' Ensure subject-verb agreement.

× No, no, actually my parents or my family members have different hobbies and I have the opposite of that.

✓ No, actually my parents and other family members have different hobbies, and mine are different from theirs.

'Parents or my family members' is redundant and awkward; use 'parents and other family members.' 'I have the opposite of that' is unclear; use 'mine are different from theirs.' Fix pronoun reference 'theirs.'

× For example, I have the dancing hobby for my long study sessions and my father has a hobby of using phone when he's very tired, which makes him.

✓ For example, I dance during long study sessions, while my father uses his phone when he is very tired.

'Have the dancing hobby for my long study sessions' is awkward — better to say 'I dance during long study sessions.' 'Has a hobby of using phone' is unnatural; use 'uses his phone.' The clause 'which makes him' is incomplete and should be removed or completed with the effect (e.g., 'which helps him relax').