Hometown— Part 1 Relatório

Sugestão: Give a direct, concise topic sentence first, then add one or two specific, relevant details. Avoid minor factual errors and informal comments that don't add meaning (e.g., 'Zurich is cool'). Use linking words to connect ideas (for example, 'because' or 'and').

Exemplo: I come from Zurich, the largest city in Switzerland. It lies in the north-central part of the country near the German border, so many people speak Swiss German. Because it is a financial and cultural centre, Zurich offers many international events and job opportunities.

Sugestão: Start with a clear topic sentence naming one main thing you like, then expand with two specific details connected by linking words. Finish sentences fully and avoid vague phrases like 'village vibe' without clarification. Use varied vocabulary (e.g., 'lakefront', 'pedestrian-friendly').

Exemplo: I like Zurich because, despite being a big city, it feels compact and friendly. For example, the city has a large lake where people swim in summer, and most neighbourhoods are walkable, so you can reach shops and parks without a car.

Sugestão: Answer briefly and accurately with clear time expressions (e.g., 'I have lived there for 31 years'). Use linking words to organise additional information (for example, 'however' or 'but'), and avoid incomplete or awkward sentences. Give a specific reason for your preference if you state it.

Exemplo: I have lived in Zurich for 31 years since I was born and raised there. I did spend one year living in Seoul, but when I returned I decided to move back because I prefer Zurich's lifestyle and opportunities.

Sugestão: Start with a clear direct answer, then give two specific reasons supported by examples. Use linking words (for example, 'firstly', 'also') and vary vocabulary (e.g., 'employment opportunities', 'cultural activities'). Avoid repetition of words like 'options' and 'opportunities'.

Exemplo: Yes, I think Zurich is great for young people. Firstly, there are many job and internship opportunities in finance, tech and creative industries, and secondly, the city offers plenty of cultural and sports activities, such as music festivals and outdoor clubs, which help young people build social networks.

× It is located in the North Central port and not that far away from the German border.

✓ It is located in the north-central part of the country and not that far from the German border.

The student used 'North Central port' which is incorrect. The correct phrase is 'north-central part (of the country)'. Also use 'far from' rather than 'far away from' in this context. Suggestion: use correct geographic phrasing and common prepositions: 'in the north-central part' and 'far from'.

× This could also be a reason why we speak Swiss German and Zurich is cool.

✓ This could also be a reason why we speak Swiss German, and Zurich is cool.

The original sentence runs two independent ideas without proper connection. Insert a comma before the conjunction 'and' to join two independent clauses. Also consider separating into two sentences for clarity. Suggestion: use punctuation or split into sentences to avoid run-on sentences.

× What I like about Zurich is that even though it's the largest city in Switzerland, it doesn't feel that way when you live there because it's more giving a village vibe.

✓ What I like about Zurich is that even though it's the largest city in Switzerland, it doesn't feel that way when you live there because it has more of a village vibe.

The phrase 'more giving a village vibe' is ungrammatical. Use 'has more of a village vibe' to describe the general impression. Suggestion: use 'have/has' + 'a/an' + noun phrase, and 'more of a' to express comparative impression.

× You have a Big Lake where you can swim.

✓ There is a large lake where you can swim.

Using 'You have a Big Lake' is informal and inconsistent in capitalization. For a neutral response use 'There is a large lake' or 'Zurich has a large lake'. Also 'Big' should not be capitalized. Suggestion: use consistent capitalization and natural subject ('Zurich has' or 'There is').

× Everything is reachable by walking, which I.

✓ Everything is reachable by walking, which I like.

The original sentence ends abruptly with 'which I.' and lacks the verb. Complete the clause with the intended verb, e.g., 'which I like' or 'which I enjoy'. Suggestion: always finish relative clauses with a verb and object.

× I was born and raised in Zurich, so therefore I left here for around 31 years.

✓ I was born and raised in Zurich, so I have lived here for around 31 years.

'Saw therefore I left here for around 31 years' is incorrect tense and word choice. Use present perfect 'have lived' to indicate duration up to now. 'Left here' is wrong meaning. Suggestion: use 'have lived here for (duration)' to express how long you have lived in a place.

× One year I've lived abroad in Seoul, but when I came back, I instantly knew that I would move back to Zurich.

✓ I lived abroad in Seoul for one year, but when I came back I immediately knew that I wanted to move back to Zurich.

'One year I've lived abroad' is awkward order and tense. Use simple past 'I lived ... for one year'. 'Instantly' is less natural than 'immediately'. 'Would move back' implies future from past; 'wanted to move back' correctly expresses the past desire. Suggestion: use clear past tense sequencing: 'I lived... I came back, and I immediately knew I wanted...'.

× No other city I would consider in Switzerland because I like living.

✓ No other city in Switzerland would I consider because I like living here.

Word order is incorrect and the sentence is missing 'here' to complete the thought. Reorder to 'No other city in Switzerland would I consider' or better 'I would not consider any other city in Switzerland because I like living here.' Suggestion: use natural affirmative word order and include necessary pronouns/adverbs like 'here'.

× Yes, in my opinion, Zurich is an excellent place for young people to grow up in because one of the main reasons is that you have many options as well as opportunities.

✓ Yes, in my opinion, Zurich is an excellent place for young people to grow up because one of the main reasons is that there are many options and opportunities.

Avoid ending the clause with the preposition 'in' when unnecessary: 'to grow up' is sufficient. Also 'you have many options' is less formal; use 'there are many options and opportunities.' Suggestion: prefer 'grow up' without trailing 'in' and use 'there are' for existence.

× You have different jobs that you could choose and areas that you can work in.

✓ There are different jobs you can choose from and different fields you can work in.

Combine natural phrasing: 'There are different jobs you can choose from' avoids overuse of 'you' and is more idiomatic. Also 'areas' is vague; 'fields' or 'sectors' is better. Maintain consistent preposition placement: 'choose from' and 'work in'. Suggestion: use 'there are' and idiomatic verb-preposition combinations like 'choose from' and 'work in'.