Hometown— Part 1 Relatório

Sugestão: Ngữ pháp và lựa chọn từ sai nhiều, câu rườm rà và có lỗi về đại từ, mạo từ và thứ tự từ. Cần trả lời trực tiếp, dùng một câu chủ đề rõ ràng, sau đó thêm 1–2 chi tiết cụ thể. Tránh lặp từ và sửa các lỗi như “in near”, “a quite vibrant”, “low delicious”, “his sister come theirs”. Sử dụng liên từ đơn giản nếu cần (e.g., “and”, “also”, “because”).

Exemplo: I was born and raised in Jiang City, a vibrant coastal town popular with international visitors. It is known for its fresh seafood and beautiful beaches, which attract many tourists who come to relax and try local dishes.

Sugestão: Câu lặp từ, thì và thứ tự từ sai; danh từ riêng và cụm từ không chính xác. Nên mở đầu bằng một câu trả lời nội dung rõ ràng, sau đó cung cấp 1–2 chi tiết cụ thể dùng liên từ phù hợp. Sử dụng thì hiện tại đơn cho thói quen. Sửa tên dịch vụ không rõ (“Jain service”).

Exemplo: I like the good transport links in my hometown. There is an international airport and frequent bus and train services, so I can travel to other cities easily and save a lot of time.

Sugestão: Thì dùng chưa chính xác và một vài lỗi chia động từ (should use present perfect for duration). Câu hơi dài, cần cấu trúc rõ: trả lời trực tiếp về khoảng thời gian, rồi nêu tình trạng hiện tại và kế hoạch tương lai với các liên từ hợp lý. Hạn chế lặp từ như “I now I move”.

Exemplo: I lived in Niagara City for almost 20 years during my childhood and adolescence. I have recently moved to Ho Chi Minh City to study at university, but I plan to return to my hometown in the future to build my career.

Sugestão: Ý chính rõ ràng nhưng có nhiều lỗi ngữ pháp và từ vựng không chính xác (“Costa tourist city”, “higher inners”). Nên mở đầu bằng câu chủ đề trực tiếp, sau đó giải thích với 1–2 lý do cụ thể và ví dụ. Dùng từ vựng phù hợp như “tourist city”, “limited job opportunities”, “limited higher education options”.

Exemplo: I don't think it's ideal for young people. Because it is mainly a tourist city, there are limited job opportunities and few higher education options, so many young people move to larger cities like Ho Chi Minh City to study and find work.

× I was born and raised in near Jiang City, which is a quite vibrant because of many international travelers.

✓ I was born and raised near Jiang City, which is quite vibrant because of many international travelers.

'in near' is incorrect; use either 'in' or 'near'. Also 'a quite vibrant' is wrong article/adjective order — use 'quite vibrant'. Ensure correct preposition and article placement.

× My hometown is also famous for its low delicious local cuisine such as seafood and the stunning beach.

✓ My hometown is also famous for its delicious local cuisine, such as seafood, and its stunning beach.

'low delicious' is incorrect adjective order and 'low' is inappropriate. Add possessive 'its' before 'stunning beach' and use commas to separate items.

× So many of his sister come theirs to joy to try seafood and enjoy seaside.

✓ So many of his sisters come there to enjoy trying the seafood and relaxing by the seaside.

Incorrect pronouns: 'his sister' should be plural 'his sisters'; 'theirs' is wrong context; 'joy to try' should be 'enjoy trying'. Use correct pluralization and pronouns.

× I I really enjoy the accessibility of my hometown.

✓ I really enjoy the accessibility of my hometown.

Duplicate 'I' is a typographical error; remove the extra pronoun to fix sentence structure.

× It had many transport options such as an International Airport, Jain service and but it's not only help me travel to all the city conveniently then owns and but also save me a lot of time.

✓ It has many transport options such as an international airport and train service, and it not only helps me travel to the city conveniently but also saves me a lot of time.

Use present tense 'has' to match current fact. 'Jain' is misspelling of 'train'. Fix conjunction order 'not only... but also' and subject-verb agreement for 'helps' and 'saves'.

× I live in Niagara City for almost 20 years during my childhood and my youth.

✓ I lived in Niagara City for almost 20 years during my childhood and my youth.

Use past tense 'lived' because the time period refers to the past. Present tense 'live' contradicts 'during my childhood and my youth'.

× However, I now I move to Ho Chi Minh City to study at university.

✓ However, I have now moved to Ho Chi Minh City to study at university.

Use present perfect 'have moved' to indicate a recent change of residence. Remove duplicate 'I'.

× Beside, I think I will return to my hometown in the future to continue building my career.

✓ Besides, I think I will return to my hometown in the future to continue building my career.

Use 'Besides' (one word) as a discourse marker meaning 'in addition'.

× I think my hometown isn't a great place for young people because my hometown mainly known as a Costa tourist city, there are few job opportunities and limits higher education options, so many young people often choose to move to a bigger city to study and find higher inners, especially in Ho Chi Minh City.

✓ I think my hometown isn't a great place for young people because my hometown is mainly known as a coastal tourist city; there are few job opportunities and limited higher education options, so many young people often choose to move to a bigger city to study and find better opportunities, especially in Ho Chi Minh City.

Missing verb 'is' after 'mainly known'. 'Costa' should be 'coastal'. 'limits higher education options' should be 'limited higher education options'. 'higher inners' is unclear — likely 'better opportunities'. Use semicolon or sentence separation for clarity and correct adjective forms.