Hometown— Part 1 Relatório

Sugestão: Be more fluent and concise. Start with a clear topic sentence, avoid filler words (uh, um), correct prepositions and article use, and use one or two supporting details. Link ideas with simple phrases.

Exemplo: I come from Kintao, a small city in the south of Kazakhstan near Turkistan. I have lived there since I was born, and I still visit often because my family lives there.

Sugestão: Organize your answer: give a topic sentence, then two specific supporting details with linking words. Use correct nouns and adjectives (peaceful people, delicious food) and avoid repetition and fillers.

Exemplo: I like my hometown because it is peaceful and the people are very friendly. In addition, there are many small cafés that serve delicious traditional food, which makes the town feel cosy and comfortable.

Sugestão: Answer the time question directly first, then add one linked detail and keep tense/use of articles correct. Avoid unrelated long statements; if you mention future plans, link them clearly to the question.

Exemplo: I have lived in Kintao since I was born; both of my parents still live there. However, in the future I would like to live in Malaysia because I admire its culture and job opportunities.

Sugestão: Give a clear direct answer (yes/no) then explain with two specific reasons using linking words. Use correct vocabulary (few entertainment options, limited activities) and avoid vague phrases and fillers.

Exemplo: Not really. There are few activities for young people in Kintao; apart from parks and cafés there are almost no entertainment venues or cultural events, so many young people move to larger cities for more opportunities.

× My hometown is, uh, in the South of the Kazakhstan.

✓ My hometown is in the south of Kazakhstan.

Use of the definite article 'the' before country names is incorrect for most countries; 'Kazakhstan' does not take 'the'. Also 'south' should be lowercase when used in a general location. Remove filler words for clarity.

× I live in city Kintao, uh, near the Turkistan, uh, near the Turkistan.

✓ I live in the city of Kintao, near Turkistan.

Use 'the city of' or 'in the city' to refer to a specific city. 'Near the Turkistan' is incorrect: 'Turkistan' is a place name and does not need 'the'. Repeating the phrase is unnecessary; streamline to a single phrase.

× And it's the, my city that I've lived since my birth.

✓ It's the city where I have lived since I was born.

The original mixes structures and uses incorrect word order. Use 'where' to refer to a place and 'since I was born' is the correct time expression. Present perfect 'have lived' fits with 'since'.

× I like about my hometown that uh, peaceful and uh, umm, friendly peoples.

✓ What I like about my hometown is that it is peaceful and the people are friendly.

'Like about' requires a clause introduced by 'what' or rephrasing. 'Peoples' is incorrect here; 'people' is the correct plural noun. Use 'it is' for describing the town and 'the people are' for describing residents.

× Also very delicious foods on the cafes.

✓ There is also very delicious food in the cafes.

'Foods' is usually uncountable when speaking generally; use 'food'. Preposition 'in' is correct for cafes. Add 'There is' to form a complete sentence describing existence.

× Umm, it's a small region, uh, with uh, quiet and comfortable umm, fillings.

✓ It's a small area with a quiet and comfortable atmosphere.

'Region' can be used but 'area' fits better; 'quiet' and 'comfortable' are adjectives that need a noun like 'atmosphere' or 'feelings'. 'Fillings' is incorrect in this context.

× I've lived there since my birth and my father and mother, exactly, my parents too, lived in this city.

✓ I have lived there since I was born, and my parents also live in this city.

Mixing present perfect 'have lived' with past 'lived' is inconsistent. If parents still live there, use present 'live'. Use 'since I was born' for natural expression.

× In the future I would like to live abroad in the Malaysia, because Malaysia, it's the like very country with very good.

✓ In the future I would like to live abroad in Malaysia, because Malaysia is a very good country.

Do not use 'the' before 'Malaysia'. Remove the filler 'it's the like' and use 'is a very good country'. Keep present simple 'is' for general statements.

× No, absolutely, because in Kentao you cannot, uh, travel to other some kind of things like a smalls that are only parks and the coffees and uh, uh, nothing to uh, go and seed.

✓ No, not really, because in Kintao you cannot do many activities; there are only small things like parks and cafes, and not much else to see or do.

'The coffees' is incorrect; use 'cafes'. 'Smalls' is not a noun; rephrase as 'small things'. 'Go and seed' is incorrect—use 'see' or 'do'. Restructure sentence for clarity and correct verb forms.