Work— Part 1 Relatório

Sugestão: Be more concise and correct grammar. Start with a clear topic sentence (e.g., "I recently graduated and I am currently looking for a job.") then add one brief supporting detail about what you are looking for. Avoid filler words and repetition.

Exemplo: I recently graduated and I am currently looking for a job. I hope to find a position related to my degree within the next few months, preferably in a professional office where I can gain practical experience.

Sugestão: Give a direct answer first and then one or two specific reasons. Use correct articles and reduce hesitations. Link your reason with a connector such as "because" or "so".

Exemplo: I don't work yet, but if I work I would like to be in an accounting department because it matches my major and I enjoy working with numbers. Also, it would help me build professional skills relevant to my career goals.

Sugestão: Give a clear opinion and support it with a concise, well-structured reason. Avoid long hesitations and repetition. Use conditional language correctly ("it depends on the person").

Exemplo: It depends on the person; accounting can be a good workplace for those who are careful and enjoy detail-oriented tasks. However, it can be stressful because small mistakes may have serious consequences and require responsibility.

Sugestão: Answer directly and give a specific reason. Fix grammar ("comfortable" with article) and avoid repetition. Mention one or two concrete aspects that make it comfortable.

Exemplo: Yes, I would like it because the workplace atmosphere is relaxed and my colleagues are friendly and helpful. For example, they often assist each other with tasks and create a supportive environment.

Sugestão: Provide a clearer plan or at least a tentative intention. Use correct tense and structure. Start with a topic sentence about your plans and add one specific step you might take (apply for higher positions, gain experience, continue studies).

Exemplo: I am still planning my future, but my immediate goal is to gain practical experience in accounting. If a better position becomes available, I will apply for it, and I also plan to take professional courses to improve my qualifications.

× So I have recently graduated and I do not work yet, but soon I hope I will get an appropriate a job.

✓ So I have recently graduated and I do not work yet, but soon I hope I will get an appropriate job.

The phrase 'an appropriate a job' contains an extra indefinite article 'a'. Use only one article: 'an' before a vowel sound or 'a' before a consonant sound. Here 'appropriate' begins with a vowel sound, so 'an appropriate job' or simply 'an appropriate job'. Remove the redundant 'a' to correct the sentence.

× Say, if I get a chance to work in in a company or an organization, I definitely prefer to work in a accounting section because that's my major and.

✓ Say, if I get a chance to work in a company or an organization, I would definitely prefer to work in an accounting section because that's my major.

The sentence has a repeated preposition 'in in' and incorrect article 'a accounting'. Remove the duplicate 'in'. Use 'an' before 'accounting' because it begins with a vowel sound. Also 'prefer' in conditional contexts is commonly 'would prefer' to express a hypothetical preference. Finally the sentence was incomplete; remove the trailing conjunction or finish the thought.

× I think it is neither good nor bad, but uh, it rely on the person's umm, because in accounting section, if there is a small, if there, if there is a small mistake, then you have to take all the responsibilities and uh, that's the reason.

✓ I think it is neither good nor bad, but it depends on the person, because in the accounting section, if there is a small mistake, then you have to take all the responsibilities, and that's the reason.

Multiple errors: 'it rely on' is incorrect verb form and requires 'it depends on' (present tense verb agreement). Use 'the accounting section' with the definite article. Remove redundant repetitions 'if there, if there'. 'Responsibilities' can stay plural. Clarify with commas for readability. These changes fix subject-verb agreement and article use and remove repetition.

× I think it is very comfortable place for me where I work because the atmosphere there and the nature, nature behavior of the of my mates, they are so friendly and very helpful now.

✓ I think it is a very comfortable place for me to work because the atmosphere and the behavior of my colleagues are friendly and very helpful.

Missing article before 'very comfortable place' — use 'a very comfortable place'. 'Nature, nature behavior of the of my mates' is redundant and ungrammatical; replace with 'the behavior of my colleagues'. Use 'colleagues' instead of informal 'mates'. Also simplify 'they are so friendly and very helpful now' to 'are friendly and very helpful' to match subject-verb agreement and avoid unnecessary words.

× So, yeah, I haven't think about the future. No, I think what goes on that's matter for me and uh, if there I got a better opportunity for my positions, I will definitely apply for it.

✓ So, yeah, I haven't thought about the future. No, I think what matters to me is what happens now, and if I get a better opportunity for my position, I will definitely apply for it.

'I haven't think' is incorrect; use the past participle 'thought' with present perfect: 'I haven't thought'. 'What goes on that's matter' is ungrammatical — use 'what happens now' and 'what matters to me'. 'If there I got' mixes tenses; use present conditional 'if I get' for a realistic future possibility. 'Positions' should be singular 'position' if referring to a specific role. These corrections fix verb tense, participle use, sentence structure, and agreement.