Work— Part 1 Relatório

Sugestão: Cümleleri daha doğal ve akıcı hâle getirmek için gereksiz yinelemeleri kaldırın ve doğru artikeller ile meslek ifadelerini kullanın. Ayrıca zaman ifadelerini (örn. "for one month") doğru biçimde yerleştirin. Örnek: kısa, net bir konu cümlesi kurun, ardından gerekli ise bir destekleyici cümle ekleyin.

Exemplo: I’m currently working at a bank as an assistant business analyst. I’ve been in this role for one month, and I mainly support data reporting and client meetings.

Sugestão: Yer isimlerini ve zamirleri doğru yazılış ve telaffuzla netleştirin; bağlantı ifadeleri kullanarak cümleleri düzenli yapın. Aynı zamanda çelişkili ifadeleri düzeltin (ör. "I have never been in Kojeli" ifadesi işe başladıktan sonra tutarsız). Kısa ve mantıklı iki cümle yeterli olacaktır.

Exemplo: I work at a bank in Gebze, Kocaeli. Next month I’ll be relocating to Gebze for my job, although I haven’t had much time to explore the area yet.

Sugestão: Gereksiz dolgu sözcüklerini (uh, umm) azaltın ve nedenleri açıkça verin. Bağlaçlar (because, and) ile sebep-sonuç ilişkisi kurun. Bir veya iki kısa destekleyici ayrıntı yeterlidir.

Exemplo: Yes, I think it’s a good place to work compared to other banks in Turkey because it offers a hybrid work model and good training opportunities for junior staff.

Sugestão: Düşüncenizi doğrudan ifade edin ve ardından spesifik bir sebep verin. Dilbilgisi hatalarını düzeltin (ör. "home prices are very expensive") ve gereksiz tekrarları çıkarın. Bağlaçlarla akışı düzeltin.

Exemplo: Actually, I don’t like the location because it’s far from the city center and housing prices in Istanbul are very expensive, which makes commuting and renting difficult.

Sugestão: Zaman ifadelerini netleştirin ve planlarınızı mantıklı sırayla verin. Gereksiz duraklamaları azaltın. "In one to three years" gibi doğal zaman ifadeleri kullanın ve nedenlerinizi veya hedeflerinizi kısaca ekleyin.

Exemplo: I plan to stay in this job for one to three years. After that, I’d like to move to Izmir for work and ideally switch to a remote position to have more flexibility.

× I'm. Working now I'm working at a bank as a assistant business analyst.

✓ I'm working now; I'm working at a bank as an assistant business analyst.

The original contains a sentence fragment ('I'm.') and incorrect article 'a' before a vowel sound 'assistant' requiring 'an'. Combine fragments and fix the article to form a correct sentence. Suggestion: remove the fragment 'I'm.' or join clauses with a comma/semicolon and use 'an' before 'assistant'.

× I have been working here for one month.

✓ I have been working here for one month.

This sentence is grammatically correct and uses the present perfect continuous appropriately to describe an action that started in the past and continues to the present. No change needed.

× I work uh, at bank and it is in Gepze Kojeli, uh, I will move to Gabza uh, next, uh, month for my job.

✓ I work at a bank and it is in Gepze Kojeli. I will move to Gabza next month for my job.

Missing indefinite article 'a' before 'bank' is incorrect in English. Also the original is a run-on with commas; split into two sentences for clarity and natural phrasing. Remove filler words and extra commas.

× Uh, I have never been in Kojeli.

✓ I have never been to Kojeli.

English uses 'been to' when referring to having visited a place. 'Been in' can be used for being inside or staying in a place; here the correct idiom is 'been to'.

× I think it is a, it's a very good place to work, uh, among other banks in Turkey, uh, because it provides umm, hybrid work style and uh, he.

✓ I think it's a very good place to work compared with other banks in Turkey because it offers a hybrid work style.

The original has repetitions ('it is a, it's a'), awkward comparison phrasing, and an incomplete fragment 'and he.' Replace with concise comparative phrase 'compared with other banks' and use 'offers' for 'provides'. Remove the stray 'he' and filler words.

× Would you like the place where you work?

✓ Do you like the place where you work?

While the question from examiner used 'Would you like...', the student's intended response should match present preference: use 'Do you like...' rather than 'Would you like...'. This aligns with the immediate state rather than a hypothetical.

× Actually, I don't like the place where I work because it is umm. So outside in the city and in Istanbul, umm, home price, uh, are very expensive.

✓ Actually, I don't like the place where I work because it is outside the city, and in Istanbul housing prices are very expensive.

The original contains a sentence fragment ('because it is umm.') and incorrect phrase 'So outside in the city'. Use 'outside the city' and correct plural noun 'housing prices' or 'home prices' with plural agreement 'are'. Rearranged to one clear sentence and removed fillers.

× I'm planning to work in here about, uh, one or three years later.

✓ I'm planning to work here for about one to three years.

Use 'work here' (no 'in') and the preposition 'for' to indicate duration. 'One or three years later' is incorrect; use 'one to three years' to show a range. Move 'about' appropriately and remove filler words.

× After that I want to, uh, move to Izmir for job.

✓ After that, I want to move to Izmir for a job.

Add the article 'a' before 'job' and remove filler. Use a comma after introductory phrase for clarity.

× Umm, and I want to work remotely.

✓ I would like to work remotely.

Saying 'I want to work remotely' is acceptable, but in formal speech 'I would like to work remotely' is more polite and fits career plan context. If keeping direct desire, 'I want to work remotely' is also correct; choose 'would like' to be more formal.