Work— Part 1 Relatório

Sugestão: Be more concise and grammatically accurate. Start with a clear topic sentence, correct tense errors, avoid filler words (umm), and limit to 3–4 sentences. Use linking words to connect ideas and provide a specific example with clearer phrasing.

Exemplo: I am a dietitian and have worked in dietetics for almost ten years. My work is both rewarding and motivating because I educate patients about food and nutrition. For example, I design personalized diet plans to help patients manage metabolic disorders and improve their health.

Sugestão: Organize the reply with a clear topic sentence, reduce redundancy, fix grammatical mistakes (e.g., 'semi-rural', 'therapeutic'), and avoid fillers. Use one or two linking words to sequence information and a specific detail about the clinic's advantages.

Exemplo: I am self-employed and run my own clinic in a semi-rural area where I live. Because it is close to home, it is convenient to take my three children there, and the clinic has abundant green space which makes the environment calm and therapeutic.

Sugestão: Avoid exaggerated language and grammatical errors. Provide a clear topic sentence, then one or two supporting reasons with precise wording. Correct verbs and sentence structure, and finish your thought fully.

Exemplo: Yes, it is an excellent place to work because the environment is pleasant, quiet and therapeutic. Patients often enjoy spending time in the garden and sometimes stay for two to three hours, which helps with their recovery.

Sugestão: Make the answer more natural by using concise sentences and correct comparisons. Remove redundancy and improve cohesion with linking words like 'because' or 'so'. Give one specific reason why you want to stay.

Exemplo: Yes, I would like to continue working here because it is much more relaxing than my previous jobs and provides a pleasant environment for my children. It really feels like an ideal place for our family to live long-term.

Sugestão: Provide a clear topic sentence about your main plan, avoid fillers, and separate professional plans from personal hobbies. Use linking words (however, meanwhile) and finish the sentence about rejuvenation. Be specific about timeline or steps.

Exemplo: Professionally, I plan to finish the multiple projects I am currently managing before taking on new responsibilities. However, I also want to dedicate more time to my hobby, rifle shooting, to help me relax and stay mentally refreshed.

× I am a dietitian by profession and it has been almost a decade since I am working in dietetics.

✓ I am a dietitian by profession and it has been almost a decade since I started working in dietetics.

Use of 'since' requires a past reference point; 'since I am working' is incorrect because 'since' should be followed by a past tense or point in time. Replace with 'since I started working' to indicate when the action began. Suggestion: use 'since' + past simple ('started') or present perfect ('have been working since 2015').

× My field is both rewarding and motivating.

✓ My field is both rewarding and motivating.

Sentence is grammatically correct. No change needed. Suggestion: none.

× It not give me chance to educate my patient regarding food and nutrition.

✓ It does not give me a chance to educate my patients regarding food and nutrition.

Missing auxiliary 'does' for negative present simple and missing plural for 'patient' when referring generally. Also add article 'a' before 'chance'. Suggestion: use 'does not' + base verb for negatives in present simple and pluralize when speaking generally.

× For example, I construct their special diet chart to get umm cured from metabolic disorders and manage their.

✓ For example, I design special diet plans to help them recover from metabolic disorders and manage their conditions.

Verb choice and structure: 'construct' is unnatural for diets; use 'design' or 'create'. 'Get cured from' is incorrect; use 'help them recover from' or 'treat'. The sentence ended abruptly; complete with 'manage their conditions'. Suggestion: use clear verb-object structures and complete thoughts.

× Where do you work?>

✓ Where do you work?

Extraneous '>' character is not appropriate in transcript. Remove it. Suggestion: ensure punctuation is correct.

× I'm self-employed, moreover, I'm running my own clinic.

✓ I'm self-employed; moreover, I run my own clinic.

Using 'I'm running' suggests a temporary action; 'I run' is more natural for ongoing operation. Also use semicolon or separate sentences for clarity. Suggestion: choose simple present 'I run' for habitual actions.

× Over the past few years, uh, it has been incredibly convenient for me because I shifted my clinic in semi rural area where I'm also residing, so it is far more convenient to go there along with my three kids.

✓ Over the past few years, it has been incredibly convenient for me because I moved my clinic to a semi-rural area where I also live, so it is much more convenient to go there with my three kids.

Use 'moved' (or 'have moved') instead of 'shifted' and 'to' instead of 'in' for relocation. 'Semi-rural' needs a hyphen. 'Residing' is formal; 'live' is natural. 'Along with' is awkward here; use 'with'. Suggestion: use 'have moved' or 'moved' + correct prepositions.

× In addition to this, it has lots of green space and the environment is therapy.

✓ In addition to this, it has lots of green space and the environment is therapeutic.

Use adjective 'therapeutic' to describe the environment, not the noun 'therapy'. Suggestion: use appropriate adjective forms ('therapeutic').

× Definitely, it is incredibly amazing place to work I can ever dream of and moreover the environment is very pleasant, quiet as well as therapeutic.

✓ Definitely, it is the most amazing place to work that I could ever dream of; moreover, the environment is very pleasant, quiet, and therapeutic.

Missing definite article 'the' before 'most amazing place'. Add relative clause structure 'that I could ever dream of'. Use commas to separate adjectives and a semicolon or period to join clauses. Suggestion: use articles correctly and join clauses with proper punctuation.

× My patient really love to visiting my place every time they spend more than two or three hours by walking in the garden and.

✓ My patients really love visiting my place; often they spend two or three hours walking in the garden.

Pluralize 'patient' to 'patients' to match 'they'. 'Love to visiting' is incorrect; use 'love visiting' or 'love to visit'. The clause was incomplete; rephrase to complete thought. Suggestion: match subject and verb number and use correct verb forms after 'love'.

× Definitely, I would like to continue my work here only because it is far more relaxing as compared to my all other previous jobs and it is a kind of dream place where I can live for longer time and moreover my kids are enjoying and having the pleasant environment.

✓ Definitely, I would like to continue working here because it is much more relaxing compared to my previous jobs, and it is the kind of dream place where I can live for a long time; moreover, my kids are enjoying the pleasant environment.

Use 'continue working' instead of 'continue my work here only'. 'Far more' -> 'much more'; 'my all other previous jobs' is incorrect order -> 'my previous jobs'. 'For longer time' -> 'for a long time'. 'Enjoying and having the pleasant environment' should be 'enjoying the pleasant environment'. Suggestion: simplify phrases, fix word order, and use correct verb forms.

× What are your future work plans?

✓ What are your future work plans?

Sentence is correct. No change needed. Suggestion: none.

× I'm very ambitious person.

✓ I'm a very ambitious person.

Missing indefinite article 'a' before 'very ambitious person'. Suggestion: use 'a' before singular countable nouns with descriptions.

× I'm already wearing several hats and really want to complete all the, uh, initiated tasks before starting or taking on anything new.

✓ I'm already wearing several hats and really want to complete all the initiated tasks before starting or taking on anything new.

Sentence is mostly fine; remove filler comma. 'Initiated tasks' is awkward but acceptable. Ensure no unnecessary pauses in writing. Suggestion: streamline phrasing: 'all the tasks I have initiated' for clarity.

× But I'm also pursuing a little hobby which is rifle shooting and really want to invest much more time on that so that I keep myself mentally rejuvenated and.

✓ But I'm also pursuing a small hobby, which is rifle shooting, and I really want to invest much more time in it so that I can keep myself mentally rejuvenated.

Use 'small hobby' rather than 'little hobby' in this context. 'Invest time in' is correct preposition. Add 'I' before 'really' for clarity and complete the sentence removing trailing 'and'. Suggestion: use 'invest time in' and include subject for clarity.