Work— Part 1 Relatório

Sugestão: Make the answer more concise and structured: start with a direct topic sentence (I am currently working), then give one brief reason and one short plan. Avoid running sentences and repetitions. Use linking words like 'because' and 'so' correctly and keep it to 2–3 sentences.

Exemplo: I am currently working. I had to leave college because of financial difficulties, but I am saving money now so I can resume my studies in the future.

Sugestão: Provide a clear job title and location in one sentence, then give one specific reason why you work there. Remove repetitions and complete unfinished thoughts. Use linking words like 'because' or 'so' to connect ideas.

Exemplo: I work as a call center agent in Cebu City. I chose this job because it pays well and allows me to save money to go back to college.

Sugestão: Give a clear topic sentence (yes/no) then support it with two specific reasons (people, environment, training, etc.). Avoid vague phrases and redundancies. Use linking words like 'because' and 'also' to structure the response and correct grammar (e.g., 'I get along with many personalities').

Exemplo: Yes, it is a good place to work because my colleagues are friendly and we have a supportive team culture. Also, the training and community at work have helped me improve my communication skills.

Sugestão: Answer directly and finish the thought. If you want to add a concern, mention one specific issue and a brief reason. Keep it to 1–2 sentences and avoid trailing off.

Exemplo: Yes, I like my workplace because of the friendly atmosphere, but I would like more opportunities for promotion in the future.

Sugestão: State your main plan clearly (to become a Marine) in one sentence, then briefly explain how education fits with that plan and what steps you are taking. Avoid hesitations and repeated phrases; use linking words like 'however' or 'also'.

Exemplo: My long-term plan is to become a Marine. However, I still want to finish college, so I am saving money now and hoping to resume my studies before applying for the Marine program.

× I'm working at the moment, I had to leave college because of financial difficulties, but I am saving money now so I can resume my studies in the future.

✓ I'm working at the moment. I had to leave college because of financial difficulties, but I am saving money now so I can resume my studies in the future.

Sentence structure error (26): The original is a run-on with comma splice. Separate into two sentences or use a coordinating conjunction. Suggest using a period after 'moment' to improve clarity.

× I work as a goal center agent at Cebu City and because I I work there because I think that that can help me to proceed my to resume my college and I believe that it's a.

✓ I work as a call center agent in Cebu City because I think that will help me resume my college studies, and I believe it's a good opportunity.

Incorrect use of prepositions (11) and sentence structure (26): Use 'in Cebu City' not 'at Cebu City'. 'Goal center' seems to be incorrect word choice; 'call center' likely intended. Remove duplicate words and fix 'proceed my to resume my college' to 'help me resume my college studies'. Also the fragment 'I believe that it's a.' is incomplete; complete the idea with 'a good opportunity.'

× Yes, of course it it's a it's a good place and the the people, yes, it's so good.

✓ Yes, of course it's a good place, and the people are very nice.

Subject-verb agreement (27) and sentence structure (26): Remove repeated words and ensure subject 'the people' agrees with verb 'are'. Replace vague 'it's so good' with 'are very nice' for grammatical correctness.

× They're so fun and they're suitable for me because for me I'm a friendly person and I'm sit for every personalities they have and also the community.

✓ They're very fun and suitable for me because I'm a friendly person and I get along with different personalities and with the community.

Incorrect use of adjectives or adverbs (13) and sentence structure (26): 'So fun' is colloquial; 'very fun' or 'fun' is better. 'I'm sit for every personalities they have' is ungrammatical; use 'I get along with different personalities'. Clarify 'also the community' to 'and with the community.'

× The it's good and it helps me a lot.

✓ It's good and it helps me a lot.

Sentence structure error (26): Remove extra article 'The' and redundant pronoun. Correct form is 'It's good.'

× Yes, of course I I like the place where I work right now, but.

✓ Yes, of course I like the place where I work right now.

Sentence structure error (26): Remove duplicate 'I' and the trailing 'but' which creates an incomplete sentence. If intending contrast, finish the clause after 'but.'

× My future work plan is to is, is to become a, a Marine.

✓ My future work plan is to become a Marine.

Present tense / sentence structure (6,26): Remove repeated filler words 'is, is to' and extra commas and articles. Use a single clear infinitive 'to become.'

× But suddenly I, as I said, I can, I can continue my college because of the, uh, financial difficulties, but I'm trying on it.

✓ However, as I said, I cannot continue my college at the moment because of financial difficulties, but I'm working on it.

Past tense / modal and negation issue (5 and 4) and word choice (26): 'But suddenly' is awkward; use 'However'. The sentence as written is confusing: likely intended meaning is inability to continue college due to financial difficulties. Use 'cannot' instead of 'can' and 'working on it' instead of 'trying on it.'

× I hope I can resume my College in the future.

✓ I hope I can resume my college studies in the future.

Article errors (22) and word choice (26): 'College' should not be capitalized and needs a noun 'studies' after it for clarity. Use 'my college studies.'