Work— Part 1 Relatório

Sugestão: Be clearer and more concise. Start with a direct topic sentence, correct grammar (e.g., "I am a student"), and give one or two specific supporting details. Avoid repetition and unclear phrases like "for command". Use linking words if adding details.

Exemplo: I am a student. I am in Grade 12 and I study two languages: my native language and English. Currently I focus on improving my English for academic study, so I spend extra time on reading and speaking practice.

Sugestão: Answer directly, use correct verb forms and reduce hesitation. Say you don’t have a paid job if true, then briefly describe the unpaid work with a specific task. Use a linking phrase like "however" or "but".

Exemplo: I don't have a paid job at the moment, but I help my mother with her small shop. For example, I assist customers, handle cash, and manage simple stock records when I'm there.

Sugestão: Give a clear topic sentence and specific reasons linked logically. Reduce fillers (umm) and use linking words like "because" and "so" correctly. Mention concrete benefits (customer flow, convenience) and one brief example.

Exemplo: Yes, it's a good place to work because the shop is in front of our house and close to the main road, so many people pass by. As a result, we get steady customers and I often meet different people every day.

Sugestão: Be natural and concise. Start with a direct statement of liking the place, then give two clear, specific reasons. Avoid vague phrases like "share our word of wisdom" and correct grammar ("we share" not "we shares"). Provide a simple concrete example (e.g., shared meals or conversations).

Exemplo: Yes, I really like working there. I enjoy meeting new people and we often have friendly conversations where we exchange advice. Sometimes customers and my family share food during busy days, which creates a warm atmosphere.

Sugestão: Provide a clear career goal and give specific reasons with better grammar. Correct vocabulary (e.g., "my dad works as an accountant" or "in finance") and say why you admire the job (skills, opportunities, salary). Use linking words such as "because" and "also" to connect reasons.

Exemplo: In the future I would like to work in accounting or finance, aiming to become a financial manager. I chose this because my father works in finance and I have seen how his career improved his life financially and professionally. Also, accounting skills are useful in any business, so I believe it offers good job prospects.

× I am currently as a student.

✓ I am currently a student.

The preposition 'as' is unnecessary here; the correct phrase is 'be a student'. Remove 'as' to form 'I am currently a student.' This follows standard English use of the verb 'to be' with a noun phrase.

× I study 2 languages which are combined English and for command I study at grad 12 and also English.

✓ I study two languages: English and Khmer; I am in grade 12.

Numbers should be written consistently ('two'), and the original sentence mixes structures. Use a colon to list the languages, and 'am in grade 12' correctly expresses current educational level. 'For command' and duplicate 'also English' are unclear and removed for clarity.

× Umm, these nowadays I'm actually jobless, I don't have any work to do, but umm, I always help my mom for her own business and I always be there for her as a assistant.

✓ These days I'm actually unemployed; I don't have any work to do, but I always help my mother with her business and I am always there for her as an assistant.

Use 'these days' or 'nowadays' (not both), and 'unemployed' is preferred to 'jobless'. Use 'help my mother with her business' (correct preposition) and 'as an assistant' (use indefinite article 'an' before a vowel sound). Change 'I always be' to 'I am always' for correct verb form and tense.

× My mom is a seller and she opened a shop umm, in front of our house so it's a very good place to work because there are a lot of people live there and it's near the National Rd. so umm, there are a lot of people passing by and umm I'm I always meet new people there.

✓ My mom is a seller and she opened a shop in front of our house, so it's a very good place to work because many people live there and it's near the National Road, so many people pass by and I always meet new people there.

Use 'in front of' correctly and punctuation to separate clauses. 'A lot of people live there' should be 'many people live there' for formality; 'people pass by' is preferred to 'people passing by' in this structure. Remove filler words and correct 'National Rd.' to 'National Road.'

× Definitely I love the place where I work at because the I as I said, I meet a lot of new people so that we always share our word of wisdom. We always shares, umm, our own perspective and we keep rebuilding ourselves. Also, umm, I never heard there are there are good we we keep sharing food.

✓ Definitely I love the place where I work because, as I said, I meet a lot of new people and we share words of wisdom. We always share our own perspectives and encourage each other. Also, I often hear good things and we keep sharing food.

Remove incorrect preposition 'work at' after 'where I work'. Fix pronoun and article issues ('the I' -> 'as I said'), subject-verb agreement ('We always share' not 'shares'), and plural forms ('perspectives'). Clarify unclear phrases: 'never heard there are there are good' is incorrect; replace with 'I often hear good things'.

× In my future I would love to work as accounting and financial manager because umm my dad work acid and I saw the improvement of him and I saw the salary of him and it made me want to follow his steps. Uh, also I think it is a job that every, every umm business.

✓ In the future I would love to work as an accounting and financial manager because my dad works in accounting and I have seen his progress and salary, which made me want to follow in his footsteps. Also, I think every business needs this role.

Use 'in the future' or 'in my future' consistently. Use the article 'an' before 'accounting', and 'my dad works' (third person singular present). Use present perfect 'have seen' to indicate experience up to now. Replace awkward 'work acid' with 'works in accounting'. 'Follow his steps' should be 'follow in his footsteps'. Clarify the final clause: 'every business needs this role.'