Work— Part 1 Relatório

Sugestão: Be more concise and grammatically correct. Start with a clear topic sentence (“I’m a makeup artist.”), then briefly add relevant detail (currently on medical leave and typically busiest in summer). Avoid repetition and incorrect prepositions.

Exemplo: I’m a makeup artist. I’m currently on medical leave due to some health issues, but I usually work most during the summer months because bridal season is busiest then.

Sugestão: Provide a direct opening sentence and give clear reasons with linking words. Correct tense and word choice (sometimes, whenever). Be specific about the places you work and when you accept salon appointments.

Exemplo: I mainly work as a freelance makeup artist, but sometimes I accept appointments at a salon. For example, I go to salons whenever clients prefer an in‑salon service or when I need extra income.

Sugestão: Organize your answer: give one clear reason, then support it with specific examples. Use correct vocabulary and grammar (people know me, my behaviour is polite, fair salary, loyal colleagues, good clientele). Avoid long run‑on sentences.

Exemplo: Yes, it’s a good place to work. People know me there and I have polite, loyal colleagues. The salon pays a fair salary and attracts steady, high‑quality clients, which makes the job enjoyable.

Sugestão: Answer directly and explain why you like it with clear, relevant details. Avoid unclear or repeated phrases. If mentioning salon features, use correct names or describe them simply (clean, well‑equipped).

Exemplo: Yes, I like working there. The salon is well‑equipped and clean, my teammates are polite and supportive, and clients often praise my work, which makes me feel appreciated.

Sugestão: Start with a clear topic sentence stating your main plans, then give specifics and link ideas (for example, in order to / additionally). Use correct verb forms (launch, part‑time tutor). Mention timelines or steps if possible to show concreteness.

Exemplo: In the future I plan to launch my own makeup business and also work as a part‑time tutor to train new artists. To prepare, I’m saving money, developing a business plan, and gaining teaching experience by mentoring junior staff so I can offer high‑quality services and help the company grow.

× I am not student, I work as a makeup artist but I am currently on leave because of some health issues.

✓ I am not a student. I work as a makeup artist, but I am currently on leave because of some health issues.

Missing indefinite article 'a' before singular countable noun 'student'; run-on sentence needs separation with a period and comma before 'but' for clarity.

× I usually work in during in summer during the summer month.

✓ I usually work during the summer months.

Extra and incorrect prepositions 'in' and repeated phrase create redundancy; use 'during' with 'the summer months' to indicate time period and plural 'months' fits general statement.

× I work as a freelancer but sometime I go to salon when they give me appointments.

✓ I work as a freelancer, but sometimes I go to a salon when they give me appointments.

Missing article 'a' before 'salon'; 'sometime' should be plural 'sometimes' to mean occasionally; comma needed before 'but'.

× I usually take these appointments when I need extra money ever when clients prefer salon service.

✓ I usually take these appointments when I need extra money or when clients prefer salon service.

Incorrect use of 'ever' here; the conjunction 'or' correctly connects the two conditions; sentence needed rephrasing for clarity.

× It is a good place because everyone know me and my honour behaviour is so polite and they give me good salary and my colleagues are very loyal with me and their customer came very good.

✓ It is a good place because everyone knows me, my honorable behavior is polite, they give me a good salary, my colleagues are very loyal to me, and our customers treat me well.

Multiple errors: 'everyone' requires singular verb 'knows' (subject-verb agreement); 'honour behaviour' is incorrect collocation, use 'honorable behavior' or 'polite behavior'; 'give me good salary' needs article 'a' and adjective order; 'loyal with me' should be 'loyal to me'; 'their customer came very good' is ungrammatical — intended meaning expressed as 'our customers treat me well'.

× The salon has The Salon has Our Legs Please and Atoms Fair.

✓ The salon has 'Our Legs Please' and 'Atoms Fair'.

Repeated fragment 'The Salon has' duplicated and inconsistent capitalization; use quotes or italics for names (kept as single quotes here) and correct structure 'The salon has X and Y'.

× My teammates are very polite and clients often praise my work, which makes me feel appreciated.

✓ My teammates are very polite, and clients often praise my work, which makes me feel appreciated.

Original sentence is mostly correct; added comma before 'and' for compound sentence clarity. No pronoun change needed.

× My future work plans are the launch my own business and teach students as part time tutor.

✓ My future work plans are to launch my own business and to teach students as a part-time tutor.

Incorrect structure 'are the launch'; use infinitive 'to launch'; 'part time' should be hyphenated 'part-time' and needs article 'a' before 'part-time tutor'.

× I also plan to work hard, support my team and provide excellent service to our clients so the company can grow.

✓ I also plan to work hard, support my team, and provide excellent service to our clients so the company can grow.

List of actions should include commas for parallel structure and clarity; verb forms are correct (infinitives implied), only punctuation and parallelism adjusted.