Advertisement— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Focus on giving a clear, direct topic sentence about one memorable advertisement, then add 1–2 specific supporting details (what the ad showed, why it impressed you) using linking words (for example, because, so, when). Keep to under five sentences and avoid repetition.

예시: One advertisement that impressed me as a child was a colorful toy commercial on TV. It showed a group of children playing with a transforming robot, which looked very exciting and fun. Because the robot could change shape and light up, I really wanted to have it. As a result, I asked my parents for that toy several times.

제안: Start with a direct answer (Yes/No) then give one clear example with a linking phrase (for example, once/when). Be specific about where and what the ad promoted. Correct simple grammar (e.g., tense, articles) and avoid repeating words.

예시: No, I don't usually see many ads on public transport. However, when I visited Peshawar recently, I noticed large posters promoting the new BRT system on buses and at bus stations. These advertisements showed route maps and colorful images of the buses, which helped me recognize the new service.

제안: Give a clear opinion sentence (I don't like ads) and follow with one or two concrete reasons using linking words (for example, because, for instance). Provide a specific example of a disappointing purchase to support your view and keep sentences concise.

예시: I don't like many advertisements because they often make products look better than they are. For instance, I once ordered a jacket shown in an Instagram ad, but when it arrived the fabric was thin and the color was different, so I felt misled.

제안: Answer directly and, if possible, offer a contrast or qualification (e.g., I generally dislike ads, but I like honest reviews). Use specific vocabulary related to advertising (e.g., misleading, exaggerated, honest) and give one clear example. Keep to 2–3 sentences.

예시: Generally, I don't like most advertisements because they often exaggerate product quality. However, I do appreciate honest ads or customer reviews that show real photos and details, because they help me decide whether to buy something.

제안: Start with a clear yes/no and give one or two specific details about where ads appear (apps, websites, email). Use linking words (for example, because, so) to explain how ads affect you and avoid vague phrases. Keep to under five clear sentences.

예시: Yes, I see a lot of advertisements on my phone and computer, especially on social media apps like Instagram and TikTok. Because these apps show many sponsored posts and pop-ups, my notifications and email are often full of promotional messages, which I find annoying.

× There are a lot of advertisement impression on me when I was a child.

✓ There were a lot of advertising impressions on me when I was a child.

The noun 'advertisement' should be plural or changed to 'advertising' as an uncountable noun; 'a lot of' requires a plural count noun or uncountable noun. Also 'are' should match past time 'was' so use 'were'. Suggest using 'advertising impressions' or 'advertisements' for clarity.

× So for instance, when I go to shop, so there were when I scroll Instagram and many thing they are going to show up.

✓ For instance, when I went shopping or when I scrolled Instagram, many things would show up.

Tense must be consistent. The student mixes present ('go','scroll') with past ('were'). Use past tense 'went' and 'scrolled' to match 'when I was a child'. Also use plural 'things' and correct verb forms; 'go to shop' should be 'went shopping'.

× So, uh, I'll see a lot of advertisement picture.

✓ I would see a lot of advertisement pictures.

Use plural 'pictures' after 'a lot of'. Also modal 'I'll' (I will) is inappropriate for past recollection; 'I would' or 'I saw' fits better. Remove unnecessary article before plural noun.

× I would say that I when I will younger, I will buy this.

✓ I would say that when I was younger, I would buy these.

'When I will younger' is incorrect; use past 'was younger'. For habitual past action use 'would' or 'used to'. 'This' should match plural 'these' if referring to items seen in ads, otherwise keep 'this' with singular.

× And moreover, I, uh, I was very impressed from advertisement.

✓ Moreover, I was very impressed by the advertisements.

Use preposition 'impressed by' not 'impressed from'. Also make 'advertisement' plural or use 'advertising' and match past tense 'was'.

× No, I don't see a lot of advertisement on trains or other transport.

✓ No, I didn't see a lot of advertising on trains or other transport when I was a child.

Context refers to past ('when I was a child'), so use past tense 'didn't see'. Use 'advertising' or plural 'advertisements' and 'transport' is fine but adding 'vehicles' or 'public transport' can be clearer.

× But yeah, when I was went to Peshawar and I think the recently BRT was BRT was introduced and the advertisement of debt.

✓ But when I went to Peshawar recently, I think the BRT was introduced and I noticed its advertisements.

Do not use 'was went' — use simple past 'went'. 'Recently' should be placed before reference and 'notice' in past is 'noticed'. 'Advertisement of debt' seems wrong; likely 'advertisements' of the BRT.

× So I recognized it that BRT advertisement and moreover the transport.

✓ So I recognized the BRT advertisement, and I also noticed the transport.

Use 'recognized' with direct object without 'it that'. Improve clarity: 'recognized the BRT advertisement' and 'noticed the transport' or 'noticed the advertisements on the transport'.

× I don't like advertisement because, uh, advertisement they see in a requirement when we see the things.

✓ I don't like advertisements because they often show things that seem perfect in ads but are different in reality.

Avoid repeating 'advertisement' then 'they'. Use pronoun correctly: 'advertisements often show...'. Rephrase for clarity and correct subject-pronoun agreement.

× So it is very actually seem bright and more pretty, but in real it not seem that type.

✓ They often seem very bright and pretty in advertisements, but in reality they do not look like that.

Word order and choice: 'very actually seem' is incorrect; use 'seem very bright'. 'In real' should be 'in reality'. Use 'do not look like that' for negative present meaning.

× So I don't like it advertisement because, uh, the thing when, uh, for instance, when I order address from date, so the quality is very bad and I don't like it.

✓ So I don't like those advertisements because, for instance, when I order something from a site, the quality is very bad and I don't like it.

Use 'those advertisements' or 'that advertisement'; 'order address from date' is unclear — likely 'order something online' or 'from a website'. Correct article use and replace vague words.

× Actually, I do not like any of advertisement because in advertisement dish, the thing that are really pretty in advertisement, but when they arrive, the material was so cheap and so I would trusting aids now and moreover, like I would say that, uh, in advertisement.

✓ Actually, I do not like any advertisements because things look very pretty in adverts, but when they arrive the materials are cheap, so I no longer trust ads.

Numerous errors: 'any of advertisement' should be 'any advertisements'; 'in advertisement dish' is incorrect phrase; 'when they arrive' matches plural 'materials are cheap'. Use present/past consistently and clear verbs: 'no longer trust'.

× Yes, I open see a lot of advertisement when I watch uh **** and for instance, when I scored in technology, there are a lot of advertisement that came in.

✓ Yes, I often see a lot of advertisements when I watch videos, and for instance, when I use social media there are many ads that appear.

'open see' is wrong; likely 'often see'. 'Scored in technology' unclear; use 'use social media' or 'browse technology apps'. Match plural 'advertisements' and use present tense for habitual action.

× It is very annoying and uh sometime I want to delete my tiktok because uh my notifications and my Gmail are full of advertisement on and also on Instagram.

✓ It is very annoying and sometimes I want to delete my TikTok because my notifications and Gmail are full of advertisements, and the same goes for Instagram.

Use 'sometimes' and capitalize 'TikTok'. 'Full of advertisement' should be 'full of advertisements'. Remove extraneous 'on' and improve parallel structure.

× I would say that the people said that this is good and.

✓ I would say that people say these ads are good, but I disagree.

Sentence is incomplete and awkward. Provide a complete clause: 'people say this is good' and contrast with student's opinion. Fix tense consistency and remove trailing conjunction.