Advertisement— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Make the response more fluent and grammatical: begin with a clear topic sentence, correct nouns and verb forms, reduce fillers, and add one specific detail (e.g., a scene or lyric) to support why it impressed you. Keep it under five sentences and use a linking word when adding detail.

예시: Yes. A Vietnamese milk commercial impressed me when I was a child because it had a very catchy melody and colorful cartoon characters. For example, there was a scene where a little cow danced and sang a simple jingle that I still remember. Because of the music and visuals, I always felt happy when I saw that ad.

제안: Improve accuracy and coherence: start with a direct topic sentence, remove hesitations, use correct prepositions and plural forms, and add a specific example of where you see ads. Use a linking word to connect observation and opinion.

예시: Yes, I do. I often see many advertisements on buses and trains, usually placed on seat backs or the sides of carriages. For instance, there is a large poster for a smartphone glued to the inside of my local bus, which is hard to miss. Therefore, I find transport advertising very eye-catching.

제안: Make your opinion clearer and grammatically correct: give a concise topic sentence stating your general view, then briefly explain what kinds of ads you like using linking words (e.g., "if" or "because"). Avoid repetition and filler sounds.

예시: It depends. I like advertisements that are creative or have memorable music because they make a strong impression on me. For example, a clever TV ad with a funny storyline or an original jingle will stay in my mind longer than a boring commercial.

제안: Clarify vocabulary and remove unclear words: use correct terms (e.g., "TV commercial" or "cinematography") and explain why you prefer that style. Give one concrete feature (lighting, music, storytelling) and link it to the effect on viewers.

예시: I prefer television commercials with strong cinematography because professional camera work and good lighting make them feel cinematic. For example, a commercial that uses slow-motion shots, a strong soundtrack, and a simple story will grab my attention and feel more memorable.

제안: Be more precise and concise: use correct nouns (e.g., "ads" or "campaigns"), avoid fillers, and explain briefly how frequent or annoying they are with a specific example. Use a linking word to conclude your feeling.

예시: Yes, definitely. I see many ads on social platforms like Facebook and TikTok, and some campaigns are repeated so often that they become annoying. For example, a single video ad for a game appears three or four times during one scrolling session, so I usually skip or block it.

× Yes, that's a worth a milk advertisement of Vietnam milk and this has a really catchy melodies and like cartoons characters that make me so happy whenever watching that advertisement.

✓ Yes, that's a worthwhile advertisement for Vietnam Milk, and it has really catchy melodies and cartoon characters that make me so happy whenever I watch that advertisement.

Errors: 'a worth a milk advertisement' uses incorrect article/phrase; should be 'a worthwhile advertisement for Vietnam Milk'. 'this has a really catchy melodies' mixes singular demonstrative with plural noun and article: 'it has really catchy melodies'. 'like cartoons characters' uses 'like' and plural noun form incorrectly; use 'cartoon characters'. 'whenever watching' lacks subject and proper verb form; use 'whenever I watch'. Suggestion: choose correct articles, match singular/plural, use appropriate noun forms and include subject for verb phrases.

× Yes, absolutely. Whenever I go on the street, I see a lot of advertisement that umm, stick in the bottom of the trains and the bus, which is really like catchy and easy to see.

✓ Yes, absolutely. Whenever I go out on the street, I see a lot of advertisements stuck on the bottom of trains and buses, which are really catchy and easy to see.

Errors: 'a lot of advertisement' should be plural 'a lot of advertisements' (quantifier + count noun). 'stick in the bottom of the trains and the bus' has wrong preposition and number agreement; use 'stuck on the bottom of trains and buses'. 'which is really like catchy' has subject-verb agreement and unnecessary 'like'; use 'which are really catchy'. Suggestion: match quantifier with plural nouns, use correct prepositions ('on' for surfaces) and ensure subject-verb agreement.

× So I think that a really interesting advertisement.

✓ So I think that is a really interesting advertisement.

Error: missing verb 'is' in present tense copular sentence. 'I think that a really interesting advertisement' is a sentence without a verb. Suggestion: include the correct form of 'to be' (is) to complete the clause.

× Well, for me it's depends on the contents that that, uh, advertisement made.

✓ Well, for me it depends on the content that the advertisement makes.

Errors: 'it's depends' is incorrect: modal contraction with depends is wrong; should be 'it depends' (subject-verb agreement). 'contents' is better singular 'content' in this context. 'that that, uh, advertisement made' mixes tenses; use present 'that the advertisement makes'. Suggestion: use simple present for general statements and correct subject-verb agreement.

× If it umm, catchy melodies, tunes or like with creative ways of advertising, I would say it's definitely impressed from for me.

✓ If it has catchy melodies or creative advertising methods, I would say it definitely impresses me.

Errors: missing verb 'has' before 'catchy melodies'; phrase 'like with creative ways' is awkward—use 'creative advertising methods'. 'it's definitely impressed from for me' uses passive and wrong preposition; choose active 'it definitely impresses me'. Also tense/modal: 'I would say' can remain conditional. Suggestion: use correct verb forms ('has') and prefer active voice when indicating feelings about something.

× I think it would be like a TVC with professional Cam caramel caramel which made the advertisement much more, uh, cinematic and catchy to people to customer.

✓ I think it would be a TV commercial with professional camerawork which makes the advertisement much more cinematic and catchy to customers.

Errors: 'TVC' acceptable but expand to 'TV commercial'; 'Cam caramel caramel' seems to be incorrect word—likely 'camerawork' or 'camera' repetition; correct to 'professional camerawork'. 'which made' should be present 'which makes' for general effect. 'catchy to people to customer' redundant—use 'catchy to customers'. Suggestion: use precise nouns, avoid repetitions, and keep tense consistent for general statements.

× Without a doubt, there's a lot of campaigned in VIP whenever I'm scrolling to some social platforms like Facebook or Tiktok, and sometimes uh, there's a lot of advertisement, uh, repeat, uh, really much often.

✓ Without a doubt, there are a lot of campaign ads on social platforms whenever I'm scrolling through sites like Facebook or TikTok, and sometimes the advertisements repeat very often.

Errors: 'there's a lot of campaigned in VIP' incorrect nouns and article; use 'there are a lot of campaign ads' (plural with 'there are'). 'in VIP' unclear—likely 'in the feed' or omit. 'scrolling to some social platforms' should be 'scrolling through social platforms'. 'there's a lot of advertisement, uh, repeat, uh, really much often' has many issues: use 'the advertisements repeat very often'. Suggestion: use correct 'there is/are' with countability, appropriate prepositions ('through'), and adverb placement ('repeat very often').

× So I don't like that.

✓ So I don't like it.

Error: 'that' is acceptable in speech but 'it' is the clearer direct object pronoun referring to repeating advertisements. Suggestion: use 'it' to refer to the situation/thing previously mentioned for clarity.