Dreams— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: 回答基本切题，也进行了过去与现在的对比，但结尾没有完成，且有较多重复、停顿和口语填充词。注意使用正确搭配：说“dreamed of becoming a teacher”，而不是“dreamed to be”；“an industrial designer”中的冠词应使用“an”。建议按照“过去的梦想—改变的原因—现在的梦想”的结构完整回答，并补充工业设计师的具体工作内容。

예시: When I was younger, I dreamed of becoming a teacher because I enjoyed helping other people learn. However, I no longer want to pursue that career because teachers often have heavy workloads and work long hours. These days, I would rather become an industrial designer, as I am interested in creating practical and attractive products.

제안: 观点明确，但“personal things”应改为“personal matters”或“private thoughts”，“I don't love sharing”不够自然，建议使用“I don't usually like sharing”。最后一句表达不完整，因果关系也不清楚。可以用连接词“because”解释原因，并具体说明中国文化中关于谈论梦想的观念。

예시: I don’t usually share my dreams with other people because I consider them private thoughts. Besides, in Chinese culture, some people believe that talking about a dream too early might prevent it from coming true. I normally discuss my plans only with my family or closest friends.

제안: 回答有明确观点，也提到了梦想能帮助人们专注和前进，但存在明显的语法错误和未完成句子，例如“dreams has”应为“dreams have”，“studies or works”应改为“studies or work”。建议区分“睡眠中的梦”和“人生目标”，并通过具体例子说明梦想如何激励自己。

예시: Yes, I think dreams can have special meanings, especially when we mean our hopes and ambitions. They give us a clear direction and motivate us to work harder. For example, my dream of becoming an industrial designer encourages me to improve my drawing and computer-design skills.

제안: 回答直接，但“be a rich person”和“have over my £1,000,000”表达不自然，且“because of if”造成语法错误。建议使用“become wealthy”和“have more than one million pounds”，并说明财富的具体用途，而不是重复“because”。结尾应完整，例如说明可以减轻经济压力、帮助家人或追求兴趣。

예시: Yes, definitely. I would like to become financially comfortable and earn more than one million pounds. With that money, I could support my family, travel more and pursue my interests without constantly worrying about expenses. However, I know I need to work hard and manage my money carefully to achieve this goal.

× When I was young, I dreamed to be a teacher for sure.

✓ When I was young, I dreamed of becoming a teacher for sure.

表示“梦想成为……”时，dream通常与介词of连用，后面接动名词（-ing形式），所以应使用dreamed of becoming，而不是dreamed to be。

× At present, I dream to be a industrial designer.

✓ At present, I dream of becoming an industrial designer.

industrial以元音音素开头，所以前面应使用an，而不是a。另外，dream of后面应接动名词becoming。

× At present, I dream to be a industrial designer and I want to.

✓ At present, I dream of becoming an industrial designer, and I want to become one.

dream of后面需要接动名词becoming。句末的“I want to”后面缺少明确内容；这里应补充become one，指代an industrial designer。

× Actually not, I don't love sharing my dreams with others cause, umm, because this is my personal things.

✓ Actually, no. I don't like sharing my dreams with others because these are my personal things.

my dreams和these指复数，因此不能使用单数代词this。复数名词things应搭配these。

× Actually, in Chinese culture, if I talk with others about my dream, it cannot be true every time when I because.

✓ Actually, in Chinese culture, people believe that if I talk to others about my dreams, they will not come true.

原句后半部分“every time when I because”结构不完整，缺少完整的主语和谓语，导致句子无法表达清楚。可以使用“if...will...”结构表达条件和结果。

× Yeah, dreams has have a lot of special meanings.

✓ Yeah, dreams have a lot of special meanings.

主语dreams是复数，谓语动词应使用have，不能使用单数形式has。原句中的has have也属于重复和错误搭配。

× First of all, because of dreams we can focus on our studies or works.

✓ First of all, because of our dreams, we can focus on our studies or work.

work表示“工作”时通常是不可数名词，不需要加-s。studies可以表示不同的学习内容，而work通常用单数形式表示整体工作。

× We tried our best to achieve our goals.

✓ We try our best to achieve our goals.

这段回答讨论梦想的一般意义和现在的情况，因此应使用一般现在时try，而不是表示过去的tried。

× We tried our best to achieve our goals and dreams also can help us to keep moving forward.

✓ We try our best to achieve our goals, and dreams can also help us keep moving forward.

also通常放在情态动词can之后、主要动词之前，因此应为can also help，而不是dreams also can help。

× We tried our best to achieve our goals and dreams also can help us to keep moving forward because I really.

✓ We try our best to achieve our goals, and dreams can also help us keep moving forward.

句末的“because I really”没有完成从句，缺少后续内容，因此形成残缺句。删除未完成的because从句后，句子结构完整。

× I hope I can have over my £1,000,000 uh, because of if I have, if I become a rich person, I can do a lot of my favorite things.

✓ I hope I can have over £1,000,000 because if I become a rich person, I can do a lot of my favorite things.

because of后面不能直接接完整的if从句；because of后面通常接名词或动名词。这里应使用because连接完整原因从句，并删除重复的if I have。金额前的over后面也不需要my。

× I don't need to consider a lot of uh.

✓ I won't need to worry about many things.

原句在a lot of后面缺少名词，句子没有完成。补充many things后意思完整；由于前文描述未来成为有钱人后的情况，使用won't need更符合语境。