Sharing— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Cấu trúc câu lộn xộn, nhiều lỗi ngữ pháp và phát âm hạn chế sự rõ ràng. Bạn nên mở đầu bằng một câu chủ đề trực tiếp, dùng thì quá khứ đơn cho hành động đã xảy ra, tránh suy nghĩ lặp lại và giảm âm ừ (uh). Thêm một hoặc hai chi tiết cụ thể về cách họ dạy bạn chia sẻ (ví dụ: chia đồ chơi, chia đồ ăn) và kết luận ngắn gọn về tác dụng.

예시: Yes, my parents taught me to share when I was a child. For example, they always encouraged me to give toys and sweets to my classmates at school. Because of that, I learned to be more considerate and make friends easily.

제안: Nội dung mơ hồ, ý không rõ ràng và ngữ pháp yếu. Trả lời nên trực tiếp nêu loại đồ vật hoặc thông tin bạn chia sẻ (ví dụ: đồ ăn, kinh nghiệm, cảm xúc). Sử dụng liên từ phù hợp (for example, because, such as) để làm rõ lý do và tránh câu quá dài.

예시: I usually share personal experiences and small items with my friends and family. For example, I often share snacks and stories about my day because talking with them makes me feel understood and happy.

제안: Câu trả lời lủng củng, ý chính (thông tin riêng tư) không được diễn đạt rõ. Hãy nói trực tiếp rằng thông tin cá nhân, mật khẩu và tài sản giá trị không nên chia sẻ, và giải thích ngắn gọn tại sao (bảo mật, an toàn). Dùng các từ vựng phù hợp như "private information", "passwords", "valuable items".

예시: I believe private information should not be shared. For instance, passwords, bank details or personal addresses can be dangerous if given to others, so I keep them confidential.

제안: Câu trả lời bị lạc đề, nhiều từ không rõ nghĩa và thiếu cấu trúc. Trả lời cần nêu vật hoặc thông tin cụ thể bạn đã chia sẻ gần đây và bổ sung chi tiết ngắn gọn (ai, khi nào, vì sao). Nếu muốn hỏi về kết bạn, không nên xen vào câu trả lời; trả lời câu hỏi trực tiếp.

예시: Recently I shared my karate uniform with my mother because she helps me wash it. Also, I shared some study notes with a classmate last week to help them prepare for an exam.

제안: Ý rõ ràng nhưng có lỗi ngữ pháp và cấu trúc. Nên bắt đầu bằng câu chủ đề ngắn, dùng cấu trúc đúng (because + clause), và cung cấp một ví dụ cụ thể về một lần bạn chia sẻ tin vui. Tránh lỗi như "when I she" và dùng danh từ số ít/phù hợp.

예시: I usually share good news with my mother because she is very supportive. For example, when I passed an important exam last year, she congratulated me and encouraged me to aim higher.

제안: Ý tốt nhưng diễn đạt lặp từ và ngữ pháp kém. Nên nêu rõ loại tin (daily events, jokes, videos) và phương tiện (social media, TikTok). Dùng liên từ để liệt kê và một ví dụ ngắn để minh họa.

예시: With my friends, I usually share daily updates and funny videos. For instance, we often send each other short TikTok clips or talk about interesting things that happened at school.

× You are my parents taught me a lot when I was child.

✓ My parents taught me a lot when I was a child.

The sentence incorrectly uses 'You are' and omits the article before 'child'. Replace 'You are' with the correct subject 'My parents' and add the indefinite article 'a' before 'child' to form 'a child'. Use correct pronoun/possessive for clarity.

× they taught me about sharing toys, candies with others or uh, hardworking and although I don't like it, but they are helpful for me.

✓ They taught me about sharing toys and candies with others, and about being hardworking; although I don't like it, it is helpful to me.

Use 'and' to join items and 'sharing toys and candies' is the correct parallel structure. 'Hardworking' should be a noun phrase 'being hardworking'. Remove the redundant conjunction 'but' after 'although' and use 'helpful to me' rather than 'for me' for natural phrasing.

× I think I can share everything in the world around me to my parents or friends because from to positive thing to negative things because it helped me realize and happy when people listen to me.

✓ I think I can share everything around me with my parents or friends, from positive things to negative things, because it helps me reflect and feel happy when people listen to me.

Use 'share ... with' rather than 'to'. 'Around me' is more natural than 'in the world around me'. Correct parallel 'from positive things to negative things'. Use present tense 'helps' to match general statement. Replace 'realize and happy' with 'reflect and feel happy' for grammatical verbs and adjective use.

× I think I don't lie. It's hard to share info a private information because it can start a password because they can call dangerous.

✓ I think I don't lie. It's hard to share private information because it could expose passwords and become dangerous.

'Info a private information' is redundant; use 'private information'. 'Can start a password' is unclear; intended meaning is 'could expose passwords'. Use 'could' for possibility and 'become dangerous' for correct predicate.

× Tie up in a karate glass and I share to my mother.

✓ I tied up in a karate class and shared it with my mother.

The original has wrong verb forms and prepositions: 'Tie up in a karate glass' should be past tense 'I tied up in a karate class' (or better 'I participated in a karate class') and use 'shared it with' rather than 'share to'. Ensure consistent past tense for a recent past event.

× Uh, what? I think they teach me, teach me and how. How can I make friends in the in this class?

✓ I think they taught me how to make friends in this class.

Combine fragmented ideas into a single coherent past-tense sentence. Use past tense 'taught' to match earlier context. Remove duplicated words and unnecessary filler 'Uh, what?'. 'In the in this class' has extra preposition; use 'in this class'.

× I usually share good news with my mother because she is really kind and when I she can give me a positive comments and encourage me to in the future.

✓ I usually share good news with my mother because she is really kind; she gives me positive comments and encourages me for the future.

Remove the misplaced 'when I' and use consistent subject 'she'. 'A positive comments' is incorrect article/number — use 'positive comments' (plural) or 'a positive comment' (singular). Use 'encourages me for the future' or 'encourages me to keep going' for clarity.

× We often share a story about daily life to give give comment to Ecosia other and sometime is entertainment via Tiktok or social media.

✓ We often share stories about daily life to give comments to each other, and sometimes share entertainment via TikTok or other social media.

Use plural 'stories' and 'give comments to each other' is correct reciprocal phrase. Fix spelling 'sometime' to 'sometimes' and 'Tiktok' to 'TikTok'. Remove repeated 'give' and correct 'Ecosia other' to 'each other'.