Part 1
시험관
Did you have a bike when you were a child?
수험생
Yes uh, obviously I had a buy when I was a child since I have been, you know, gifted by, uh, my mom's, you know, like that, such a good gift that you know, like that give me a lot of opportunity and a lot of motivation in order to ride bike. Firstly, I got many difficulty with this bike, but yeah.
시험관
Do you think bikes are popular in your country?
수험생
Yeah, I think mine is very necessary, especially in the elderly who got no, you know, like no, no motivation and no, and got some difficulties with, uh, writing a motorbike. So yeah, the proper situation is just ride a bike appropriately.
Did you have a bike when you were a child?
점수: 35.0제안: Answer directly and avoid fillers such as “you know” and “like that,” which make the response difficult to follow. Use “bike,” not “buy,” and say “I was given” rather than “I have been gifted by.” Keep the answer to a few clear sentences, and explain what difficulties you had or how you learned to ride.
예시: Yes, I had a bike when I was a child. My mother gave it to me as a present, and I was excited to learn to ride it. I found it difficult to balance at first, but I gradually improved with practice.
Do you think bikes are popular in your country?
점수: 30.0제안: Answer whether bikes are popular in your country, rather than whether they are necessary. Clarify what kind of bike you mean, and use accurate phrasing such as “older people” and “find it difficult to ride a motorbike.” Avoid repeated fillers and give one specific reason or example to support your opinion.
예시: Yes, bikes are quite popular in my country, especially in smaller towns. They are an affordable and convenient way to travel short distances, and some older people prefer cycling to riding a motorbike.
× since I have been gifted by, uh, my mom's, you know, like that, such a good gift
✓ because my mom gave me the bike as a gift
The answer refers to a gift received during childhood, so use the simple past gave to describe the completed event. Use my mom, not the possessive form my mom's, before the verb.
× such a good gift that you know, like that give me a lot of opportunity and a lot of motivation
✓ It was such a good gift that it gave me a lot of motivation and opportunities.
The gift and its effects are being described in a past-time context, so use gave rather than give. The correction also makes the clause complete by including the subject it.
× in order to ride bike
✓ in order to ride a bike
Bike is a singular countable noun, so it needs an article. Use a before bike when referring to one bike in general.
× Firstly, I got many difficulty with this bike
✓ Firstly, I had many difficulties with this bike.
Many is used with plural countable nouns. Change difficulty to difficulties. Had is also more appropriate than got when describing an experience in the past.
× especially in the elderly
✓ especially among elderly people
Use among when referring to a group of people. In does not express this meaning correctly in this sentence.
× especially in the elderly who got no, you know, like no, no motivation and no, and got some difficulties
✓ especially among elderly people who have little motivation and have some difficulties
The student is making a general statement about elderly people, so use the present tense have rather than the past-tense form got.
× the proper situation is just ride a bike appropriately
✓ the proper approach is just to ride a bike appropriately
The verb phrase after is needs an appropriate complement. Use the infinitive to ride rather than ride directly.