Bike— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Answer directly and avoid repeating words such as “I had.” Use the past tense consistently and connect the events clearly with “but” or “so.” Also, use a natural expression such as “I got a new one” instead of “I got the new one.”

예시: Yes, I had a red bike when I was a child, but it broke down after a few years. So, I got a new pink one, which I really liked.

제안: Give a clear opinion first, then support it with specific reasons or examples. Use linking words and accurate vocabulary: “In winter, it can be too slippery to ride,” “many people ride bikes,” and “cycling” instead of “thriving with pikes.” Avoid informal fillers such as “yeah” and make the final sentence easier to follow.

예시: Yes, bikes are quite popular in my country, especially in spring, summer, and autumn. Many people ride them to work or for exercise because cycling is convenient and inexpensive. However, fewer people cycle in winter because the roads can be slippery.

× Yes, I had I had one red and it broke down so I got the new one which was pink.

✓ Yes, I had a red one, but it broke down, so I got a new one, which was pink.

The phrase I had is unnecessarily repeated. In addition, the ideas need clearer punctuation and a conjunction. Use but to show the contrast between the bike breaking down and getting a new one.

× Yes, I had I had one red and it broke down so I got the new one which was pink.

✓ Yes, I had a red one, but it broke down, so I got a new one, which was pink.

Use the indefinite article a before a singular countable noun when mentioning one bike that has not been previously identified. Also, use a new one rather than the new one because this is the first time the new bike is mentioned.

× People use them in spring, in summer and in autumn in winter they can do it too slippery but yeah I can see very many people are thriving with pikes.

✓ People use them in spring, summer, and autumn. In winter, they can use them too, but it can be too slippery. However, I can still see many people riding bikes.

The original sentence is a run-on sentence because several complete ideas are joined without proper punctuation or suitable conjunctions. Divide the ideas into separate sentences and use but to connect contrasting information. The phrase can do it too slippery is also structurally incomplete; use it can be too slippery instead.

× People use them in spring, in summer and in autumn in winter they can do it too slippery but yeah I can see very many people are thriving with pikes.

✓ People use them in spring, summer, and autumn. In winter, they can use them too, but it can be too slippery. However, I can still see many people riding bikes.

The adjective slippery must describe a subject, such as it or the roads. The phrase do it too slippery is not grammatically correct. Use it can be too slippery or the roads can be too slippery.

× People use them in spring, in summer and in autumn in winter they can do it too slippery but yeah I can see very many people are thriving with pikes.

✓ People use them in spring, summer, and autumn. In winter, they can use them too, but it can be too slippery. However, I can still see many people riding bikes.

Many is the natural quantifier for people in this sentence. Very many is possible in some contexts, but it sounds unnatural here. Use many people instead.