Bike— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Answer the question directly at the beginning, then add one or two specific details. Avoid repetition such as “my mom” and “my mother,” and reduce fillers like “Umm” and “actually.” The sentence “I remember my mom, it was my mother who...” is grammatically awkward; use a relative clause or separate sentence instead. Use linking words such as “and” or “because” to make the answer flow more naturally.

예시: Yes, I did. My mother bought me a bicycle for my seventh birthday, and she taught me how to ride it in a park near our house. I was quite excited because it was my first bicycle, and I used to ride it there every weekend.

제안: Give a clear answer first: bikes are popular or not popular, and then explain why. Correct the unclear phrase “those who loved right up to ride a bike” to “people who love riding bikes,” and replace “did not like allow” with “does not allow.” Avoid repeating “you know” and “'cause,” and finish the sentence instead of ending with “it’s.” Add a specific comparison or example, such as the popularity of motorbikes in Hanoi or the effects of traffic, weather, and air pollution.

예시: Yes, bikes are fairly popular in my country, especially for exercise and short trips. However, they are not the main form of transport in Hanoi because the heavy traffic, hot weather, and air pollution can make cycling uncomfortable. Most people prefer motorbikes for their daily commute because they are faster and more convenient.

× I remember my mom, it was my mother who bought me a bicycle for my 7th birthday.

✓ I remember that my mother bought me a bicycle for my seventh birthday.

The original sentence incorrectly joins two independent structures: I remember my mom and it was my mother who bought me.... Use that to introduce the clause after remember. Also, mother is already clear, so mom and mother do not need to be repeated.

× I think it is only popular for those who loved right up to ride a bike.

✓ I think it is only popular among people who like riding bikes.

The question asks about bikes in general, so use the present-tense verb like, not the past-tense verb loved. The phrase loved right up to ride is also grammatically incorrect. Use like riding or like to ride. Among is more natural than for when referring to a group of people.

× The weather and the air pollution in Hanoi did not like allow people to ride a bike on a daily basis.

✓ The weather and air pollution in Hanoi do not allow people to ride bikes on a daily basis.

The answer discusses a current situation, so use the present tense do not allow. The verb like is unnecessary and cannot be placed before allow in this structure. Because weather and air pollution form a compound plural subject, use do, not does.

× 'Cause you know it's.

✓ You know, the weather is often unsuitable for cycling, and the air pollution can be quite bad.

The original expression is an incomplete sentence because it's has no complement. Complete the idea by stating what the weather or air pollution is like. Avoid ending a sentence with an unfinished contraction such as it's.